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She reads people, and he reads manuals. He doesn't ask for directions, and she doesn't appreciate his advice. She is so mysterious, and he is so practical. He does not seem to listen, and she seems so emotional. The list goes on and on . . . In a world where men and women are constantly told they are not different, His Brain, Her Brain shows couples what they instinctively know--men and women are different, and these divinely designed differences, when understood, make a marriage stronger and happier. Combining the latest brain research along with their experiences in over three decades of marriage and counseling, Dr. Walt and Barb Larimore explain how the unique design of each sex, particularly the unique brain and hormones of each, results in different habits, tendencies, and nuances of thought and action.
What separates happy marriages from miserable ones? Surprisingly, it’s not healthy communication. It’s not conflict resolution skills. It’s actually the size of the marriage’s joy gap . Joy Gap/joi gap/ (n.)-1. The length of time between moments of shared joy When the joy gap gets bigger, problems are more likely to overwhelm you, resentment creeps in, and you start to feel distant and alone in your marriage. When the joy gap is smaller, you regularly feel connected and happy, problems feel manageable, and your marriage becomes a reliable source of joy. But how do you ensure that you’re experiencing joy regularly? Marcus Warner and Chris Coursey have studied relationships (and neuroscience) and discovered four habits that keep joy regular and problems small. Some couples do them naturally, but anyone can learn. That’s why each chapter includes 15-minute exercises that boost joy and re-train your brain to make joy your default setting. You’ll learn new skills including how to: return to joy more quickly after disconnection create stronger bonds and elongate times of happiness boost your enjoyment of physical and emotional intimacy Find out what your marriage looks like after a little work and a whole lot of joy.
Abby Maslin shares an inspiring story of resilience and commitment in a deeply affecting new memoir. After her husband suffered a traumatic brain injury, the couple worked together as he recovered—and they learned to love again. When Abby Maslin's husband, TC, didn't make it home on August 18, 2012, she knew something was terribly wrong. Her fears were confirmed when she learned that her husband had been beaten by three men and left for dead mere blocks from home, all for his cell phone and debit card. The days and months that followed were a grueling test of faith. As TC recovered from a severe traumatic brain injury that left him unable to speak and walk, Abby faced the challenge of caring for—and loving—a husband who now resembled a stranger. Love You Hard is the raw, unflinchingly honest story of a young love left broken, and the resilience required to mend a life and remake a marriage. Told from the caregiver's perspective, this book is a daring exploration of true love: what it means to love beyond language, beyond abilities, and into the place that reveals who we really are. At the heart of Abby and TC's unique and captivating story are the universal truths that bind us all. This is a tale of living and loving wholeheartedly, learning to heal after profound grief, and choosing joy in the wake of tragedy.
What do lion attacks and fights with your spouse have in common? The brain reads both as a threat to survival and triggers a fight-or-flight stress alarm. Energy is needed: your heart beats faster, your blood pressure and breathing increase, and your body is prepared to make a run for it or battle it out. Both can damage brain cells if you're not careful! Solving conflict in marriage in a constructive, cooperative way is an essential skill. Your Marriage and Your Brain takes the danger out of this challenging event. This book highlights thirteen positive skills that move couples from conflict to resolution, drawing from four research fields: neuroscience, attachment theory, love lab psychology, and interpersonal neurobiology. You'll learn: —Why anger causes brain damage in the sender and receiver. —How to give negative feedback in a positive way. —How to solve problems in writing rather than verbally. — How affection and touch create a friendly climate for problem-solving. — How childhood abuse stops positive problem-solving in marriage. —Why the criticism-rejection link is stressful to the brain. —How to not be a 'symbolic predator' to your mate.
"Invaluable for so many partners looking to reconnect and grow closer together." —Gwyneth Paltrow, founder and CEO of goop "Stan Tatkin can be entirely followed into the towering infernos of our most painful relationship challenges." —Alanis Morissette, artist, activist, and wholeness advocate The complete “insider’s guide” to understanding your partner’s brain, sparking lasting connection, and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust—now with more than 170,000 copies sold. “What the heck is my partner thinking?” “Why do they always react like this?” “How can we get back that connection we had in the beginning?” If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, you aren’t alone, and it doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed. Every person is wired for love differently—with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people’s minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and routines, making it possible to neurologically prime the brain for greater love and connection and fewer conflicts. This go-to guide will show you how. Drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this highly anticipated second edition of Wired for Love presents cutting-edge research on how and why love lasts, and offers ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship. This fully revised and updated edition also includes new guidance on how to manage disagreements, as well as new exercises to help you create a sense of safety and security, establish healthy conflict ground rules, and deal with the threat of the third—any outside source which threatens the harmony in your relationship, including in-laws, alcohol, children, and affairs. You’ll find proven-effective strategies to help you strengthen your relationship by: Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening routines to stay connected Learning how to see your partner’s point of view Meeting each other halfway in a fight Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By using simple gestures and words, you’ll learn to put out emotional fires and help your partner feel appreciated and loved. You’ll also discover how to move past a “warring brain” mentality and toward a more cooperative “loving brain.” Most importantly, you’ll gain a better understanding of the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships. While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you understand how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences, and create a lasting intimate connection.
From the New York Times bestselling author of Getting the Love You Want and Keeping the Love You Find comes illuminating and inspiring advice on one of the most complicated issues facing couples today: receiving love. Many people know how to give love, but many more undermine their relationships by never having learned how to accept it. We don't always realize the ways in which we reject appreciation, affection, help, and guidance from our romantic partners. According to Hendrix and Hunt, until we are able to understand the meaning behind our behavior, our relationships stand to suffer. Receiving Love prompts questions such as: -Are you reluctant to tell your partner what you really want or need? -When you do get what you've asked for, do you still feel dissatisfied? -Is it difficult for you to accept kind gestures, gifts, or compliments from your partner? With Receiving Love, you can learn how to break the shackles of self-rejection and embrace real intimacy. Drawing on their renowned expertise, the wide clinical experience of Imago therapists, and their own personal experience as a married couple, the authors offer detailed, sensitive advice on how to turn a relationship between two well-meaning yet misunderstood individuals into a true, everlasting partnership.
God calls women to influence and move their husbands in positive ways. Applying the concepts from his bestseller, Sacred Marriage, Gary Thomas offers a view through a man’s eyes. Here’s the inside scoop on what men find motivating—with inspiring real-life stories of women who are employing this knowledge to transform their marriages. Sacred Influence doesn’t flinch from difficult marital problems. But by using this faith-focused approach, you’ll see how to help your husband become the man God intends him to be. At the same time, God will shape you to be the woman he designed you to be. God has given godly women a wonderful power to influence and encourage their husbands. What’s the secret? This book will provide challenges, examples, and hope to women who want to love their husbands well and be loved well in return. --Dennis Rainey, President of Family Life
Over 900,000 copies sold! According to researchers, the vast majority--a whopping 75-98 percent--of the illnesses that plague us today are a direct result of our thought life. What we think about truly affects us both physically and emotionally. In fact, fear alone triggers more than 1,400 known physical and chemical responses in our bodies, activating more than thirty different hormones! Today our culture is undergoing an epidemic of toxic thoughts that, left unchecked, create ideal conditions for illnesses. Supported by current scientific and medical research, Dr. Caroline Leaf gives readers a prescription for better health and wholeness through correct thinking patterns, declaring that we are not victims of our biology. She shares with readers the "switch" in our brains that enables us to live happier, healthier, more enjoyable lives where we achieve our goals, maintain our weight, and even become more intelligent. She shows us how to choose life, get our minds under control, and reap the benefits of a detoxed thought life.
A couples therapist and relationship expert explains why conflicts between partners often result in a lack of self-control and compassion. This guide shows how to overcome destructive impulses and nurture loving and rational qualities.