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Governor Bill Hoeksma of Michigan is a simple, gun-loving son of a billionaire who idolises George W. Bush. When a mysterious illness afflicts members of his inner circle, his conspiring advisors point to a rumoured viral weapons attack – via monkeypox-carrying prairie dogs – launched by the Wisconsin government. Governor Bill decides the Michigan militia should lead the military response, chaos ensues, and he falls unwittingly into a scheme of his powerful father’s making. That scheme begins with cheese research and a Hollywood movie star. How it will end all depends on two unlikely heroes: an aging lesbian state senator, and a high-school teacher born and raised in the Michigan militia. When the conspiracy runs out of road, and guns are drawn in a showdown outside a Cracker Barrel, will anyone emerge victorious from the Great American Cheese War? What readers are saying about The Great American Cheese War: "A rollicking riot of insanity and I mean that in the most wonderful sense! I laughed my way through this story." "Highly recommended!! This book was a lot of fun, I laughed out loud, and it's a clever satire book. It's well written, engrossing and entertaining." "Enjoy your summer, read this book!" "Satire at its finest. The whole book had me rolling on floor laughing!"
Patrick Elephant is scared of lots of things, like the dark and the fluff under the sofa. His daddy isn't scared of anything - except mice! So when a mouse posing as a cheese inspector tries to steal the elephants' cheese, Daddy is too terrified to stop him! Can little Patrick Elephant save the cheese - and his father? A hilarious new tale from Tim Warnes (Dangerous!, Monty and Milli - The Totally Amazing Magic Trick). The Great Cheese Robbery is the perfect book for kids dealing with phobias. Warnes' fresh and quirky illustrations and mischievous mice will captivate young readers. A fantastically funny story that parents won't mind reading again and again . . . and again!
One father-son duo make a pizza so delicious, and so over-the-top with toppings, that it destroys the universe—and will surely melt readers' minds and hearts, like warm mozzarella. It's a tale as old as time: a kid wants to make a pizza with his dad, but not just any pizza . . . he wants a pizza with everything on it. That's right, everything. But as the toppings pile on, this father-son duo accidentally create a pizza so delicious, so extravagant, so over-the-top, that it destroys the universe—and the cosmos go as dark as burnt crust. Will anyone enjoy pizza ever again? At turns heartwarming, hilarious, and completely out of this world, Kyle Scheele and Andy J. Pizza deliver a riotous adventure that will melt readers minds and hearts and leave them calling for a second helping. • FATHER'S DAY GIFTING: This heartwarming and hilarious portrait of a memorable father-son bonding experience is the perfect way to show appreciation to the tough-to-buy-for dad all year round, and especially on Father's Day! • FOOD-THEMED HILARITY: A mouthwatering and laugh-out-loud funny story of culinary catastrophe! This book is for fans of food-themed classics like Green Eggs and Ham, If You Give a Mouse a Cookie, and Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs. • ELEMENT OF CHAOS: Starting with something as relatable as pizza toppings, and culminating in the destruction of the universe, the escalating silliness is literally out of this world. For anyone who loves books that celebrate the absurd and chaotic, like Dragons Love Tacos or Llama Destroys the World. • TIMELESS QUALITY: A classic family-bonding moment—making pizza—leads to memorable father-son adventure, with a heartwarming and satisfying ending ensuring countless rereads. • PIZZA: Universal and delicious. Perfect for: • Anyone who likes pizza • Fathers looking for a lighthearted book to share with their kids • Fans of the absurd, chaotic, and hilarious • Foodies and their children • Anyone looking for wholesome family stories about family bonding • Fans of Dragons Love Tacos and Llama Destroys the World
Does one need four fully grown foxgloves for decorating a dinner table for six guests? Or is it six foxgloves to kill four fully grown guests? Sophronia's first year at Mademoiselle Geraldine's Finishing Academy for Young Ladies of Quality has certainly been rousing! For one thing, finishing school is training her to be a spy (and won't Mumsy be surprised?). Furthermore, Sophronia got mixed up in an intrigue over a stolen device and had a cheese pie thrown at her in a most horrid display of poor manners. Now, as she sneaks around the dirigible school, eavesdropping on the teachers' quarters and making clandestine climbs to the ship's boiler room, she learns that there may be more to a field trip to London than is apparent at first. A conspiracy is afoot--one with dire implications for both supernaturals and humans. Sophronia must rely on her training to discover who is behind the dangerous plot-and survive the London Season with a full dance card. In this bestselling sequel to New York Times bestselling Etiquette & Espionage, class is back in session with more petticoats and poison, tea trays and treason. Gail Carriger's distinctive voice, signature humor, and lush steampunk setting are sure to be the height of fashion this season.
**Wine and Spirits Book of the Year 2017** A fascinating look into the world of cheese and its creators. In little more than a century, the drive towards industrial and intensive farming has altered every aspect of the cheesemaking process, from the bodies of the animals that provide the milk to the science behind the microbial strains that ferment it. Reinventing the Wheel explores what has been lost as expressive, artisanal cheeses that convey a sense of place have given way to the juggernaut of homogeneous factory production. While Bronwen and Francis Percival lament the decline of farmhouse cheese and reject the consequences of industrialisation, this book's message is one of optimism. Scientists have only recently begun to reveal the significance of the healthy microbial communities that contribute to the flavour and safety of cheese, while local producers are returning to the cheese-making methods of their parents and grandparents. This smart, engaging book sheds light on the surprising truths and science behind the dairy industry. Discover how, one experiment at a time, these dynamic communities of researchers and cheesemakers are reinventing the wheel.
When the daughter of the Queen of the Mischief Monsters runs away from home, it is up to Edward, Moongobble, Urk, and Fireball to return her to Monster Mountain--then start a new quest.
When their regular teacher is sick, Andy's fourth-grade class gets a substitute teacher, providing lots of opportunities for Andy and his friends to get in trouble.
Before there was Lois Lowry’s The Giver or M. T. Anderson’s Feed, there was Robert Cormier’s I Am the Cheese, a subversive classic that broke new ground for YA literature. A boy’s search for his father becomes a desperate journey to unlock a secret past. But the past must not be remembered if the boy is to survive. As he searches for the truth that hovers at the edge of his mind, the boy—and readers—arrive at a shattering conclusion. “An absorbing, even brilliant job. The book is assembled in mosaic fashion: a tiny chip here, a chip there. . . . Everything is related to something else; everything builds and builds to a fearsome climax. . . . [Cormier] has the knack of making horror out of the ordinary, as the masters of suspense know how to do.”—The New York Times Book Review “A horrifying tale of government corruption, espionage, and counter espionage told by an innocent young victim. . . . The buildup of suspense is terrific.”—School Library Journal, starred review An ALA Notable Children’s Book A School Library Journal Best Book of the Year A Horn Book Fanfare A Library of Congress Children’s Book of the Year A Colorado Blue Spruce Young Adult Book Award Nominee
Jimmy McGee is a tiny, leprechaun-like man whose peaceful life is disrupted when he rescues Amy's doll Little Lydia from a monstrous wave that sweeps her off the beach. Can Jimmy find a way to restore Little Lydia to her original state as a "do-nothing doll" before he returns her to her rightful owner? From the bestselling author of Ginger Pye comes the quirky story of a little man who saves the day in a big way.
Tired of gangster movies and a steady diet of candy wrappers, three theater mice decide to rob a cheese shop.