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WARNING: This book contains laugh-out-loud jokes about fake tans, vajazzles and all fings Essex Forget the Rolex or the flash car, what you really need in your life to make your friends well jel is The Essex Joke Book. It’s packed full of bling-tastic banter, racy rib-ticklers and gob-smackingly good gags all about Essex Girls and Boys, their tans and tribulations, conquests and cock-ups, and more. How can you tell an Essex Girl has been using her iPad? There’s Tipp-Ex on the screen. What do you call the skeleton of an Essex Boy in a wardrobe? Last year’s hide-and-seek champion. What goes blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette? An Essex Girl doing naked cartwheels. An Essex Girl gets a job as a teacher. She notices a boy in the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun. She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him. ‘You can go and play with the other kids, you know,’ she says. ‘It’s best I stay here,’ he says. ‘Why?’ asks the Essex Girl. The boy says: ‘Because I’m the f**king goalkeeper.’
'Not all Essex girls are party girls. They can be sages, martyrs, leaders. In her neat and provocative little book, Sarah Perry celebrates their courage and vivacity.' Hilary Mantel A defence and celebration of the Essex Girl by the best-selling author of The Essex Serpent Essex Girls are disreputable, disrespectful and disobedient. They speak out of turn, too loudly and too often, in an accent irritating to the ruling classes. Their bodies are hyper-sexualised and irredeemably vulgar. They are given to intricate and voluble squabbling. They do not apologise for any of this. And why should they? In this exhilarating feminist defence of the Essex girl, Sarah Perry re-examines her relationship with her much maligned home county. She summons its most unquiet spirits, from Protestant martyr Rose Allin to the indomitable Abolitionist Anne Knight, sitting them alongside Audre Lorde, Kim Kardashian and Harriet Martineau, and showing us that the Essex girl is not bound by geography. She is a type, representing a very particular kind of female agency, and a very particular kind of disdain: she contains a multitude of women, and it is time to celebrate them.
What is the difference between a dog and a fox? About 9 pints What do you call a man with a 2 inch penis? Justin What's pink and hard in the morning? The Financial Times crossword Did you hear about the consignment of Viagra pills stolen from a warehouse? Police are on the lookout for hardened criminals An aeroplane is about to crash, when a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, 'If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman.' She removes all her clothing and asks, 'Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?' A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, 'Here, iron this!' The greatest ever collection of dirty jokes guaranteed to offend and outrage the prudish. Full of hilarious gags, it's totally politically incorrect, unashamedly x-rated and downright filthy. Definitely one to keep well out of the way of the mother-in-law...
If you've ever heard a Jewish, Italian, Irish, Libyan, Catholic, Mexican, Polish, Norwegian, or an Essex Girl, Newfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of Fencing jokes is for you. In this not-so-original book, The Best Ever Book of Fencing Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who, Mark Young takes a whole lot of tired, worn out jokes and makes them funny again. The Best Ever Book of Fencing Jokes is so unoriginal, it's original. And, if you don't burst out laughing from at least one Fencing joke in this book, there's something wrong with you. This book has so many Fencing jokes, you won't know where to start. For example: Why do Fencers wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace. *** An evil genie captured a Fencer and her two friends and banished them to the desert for a week. The genie allowed each person to bring one thing. The first friend brought a canteen so he wouldn't die of thirst. The second friend brought an umbrella to keep the sun off. The Fencer brought a car door, because if it got too hot she could just roll down the window! *** Did you hear about the Fencer who wore two jackets when she painted the house? The instructions on the can said: "Put on two coats." *** Why do Fencers laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it. ***
The Farming Joke Book brings together around 500 jokes, amusing stories, and anecdotes about farmers, farm animals, and life on the farm in general. So, whether one has been farming for 'donkey's years' or is new to it, and whether these farming two-liners make the reader laugh, cry, or just groan out loud, there will definitely be something in this collection that will tickle anyone's farming funny bones. Divided into 16 categories, and with 32 specially commissioned illustrations by Rory Walker, this pocket sized book will provide hours of enjoyment and is the perfect tool for the farmer wanting to entertain friends, family, and colleagues, no matter his or her age. [Subject: Humor, Agriculture]
Translation studies and humour studies are disciplines that have been long-established but seldom looked at in conjunction. This volume uses literature as the common ground and examines issues of translating humour within a range of different literary traditions. It begins with an analysis of humour and translation in every day life, including jokes and cross-cultural humour, and then moves on to looking at humour and translation in literature through the ages. Despite growing interest and a history of collaborative study, there has been little translation studies scholarship published in this area. This collection features a comprehensive introduction by the editor, which covers strategies and techniques for translating humour as well as the pragmatics involved. The book will appeal to scholars and postgraduates in translation and interpreting studies and humour studies.
The book is intended to provide a definitive view of the field of humor research for both beginning and established scholars in a variety of fields who are developing an interest in humor and need to familiarize themselves with the available body of knowledge. Each chapter of the book is devoted to an important aspect of humor research or to a disciplinary approach to the field, and each is written by the leading expert or emerging scholar in that area. There are two primary motivations for the book. The positive one is to collect and summarize the impressive body of knowledge accumulated in humor research in and around Humor: The International Journal of Humor Research. The negative motivation is to prevent the embarrassment to and from the "first-timers," often established experts in their own field, who venture into humor research without any notion that there already exists a body of knowledge they need to acquire before publishing anything on the subject-unless they are in the business of reinventing the wheel and have serious doubts about its being round! The organization of the book reflects the main groups of scholars participating in the increasingly popular and high-powered humor research movement throughout the world, an 800 to 1,000-strong contingent, and growing. The chapters are organized along the same lines: History, Research Issues, Main Directions, Current Situation, Possible Future, Bibliography-and use the authors' definitive credentials not to promote an individual view, but rather to give the reader a good comprehensive and condensed view of the area.
A witty collection that celebrates the strength to find humor even in the most challenging circumstances—with proceeds benefiting veterans. Britain’s armed forces have a legendary sense of humor, dating back over generations of servicemen and women. The Laughing Soldier, aiding the veterans’ charity Project 65, is a collection of jokes, along with messages of support for the troops, sent in by people all over the world. Contributors include serving personnel, veterans and their families, the general public, celebrities such as Alan Titchmarsh, comedian Milton Jones, and public officials including George Osborne, all inspired by the Armed Forces’ strength and capacity for finding humor in the toughest of situations. With forewords by satirist Al Murray, a.k.a. the Pub Landlord, and ex-marine Mark Ormrod, the Afghanistan hero who lost three limbs to a landmine and bestselling author of Man Down, and illustrated with cartoons by The Comic Stripper, The Laughing Soldier’s collection of jokes will lift the spirits of servicemembers and their families—and those who care about them. A donation is made to Project 65 from the sale of every book.