Turney Hall
Published: 2014-05-27
Total Pages: 0
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A man without a little gamble in him isn’t worth a damn. That is why Turney Hall has decided to bare his soul -- and his scalp -- in An Eagle Soars: One Man’s Journey to Baldness in a heroic attempt to make the world a better place for bald men. An Eagle Soars is a hilarious account of Turney’s experience with and musings on male pattern baldness as he learns to accept his own hair loss. In An Eagle Soars, Turney searches for the meaning of male pattern baldness. He takes a trip to the public library for some insight on many of its aspects, such as scientific (how this genetic condition is a bigot that hates whites more than any other race), psychological (why young bald men may not have any hope with cheerleaders, but still have a shot with cougars), religious (how God thinks bald men are better than lepers, and won’t hesitate to unleash a sleuth of bears on anyone who dares taunt the bald), legal (how the amount of hair on your head could mean the difference between acquittal and a guilty verdict, and if your boss ever says to you, “Let’s take it outside, you bald pussy,” you better take it outside and show him who the real pussy is), and much more! While there is a stereotype that bald men are less likeable, successful, happy, and confident than their non-balding counterparts, that doesn’t mean they should just give up on life. Instead, An Eagle Soars exhorts those who are losing their hair to accept their destiny and do their damnedest to reverse the stereotypes that plague their kind.