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Seventy now-adult children of divorce give their candid and often heart-wrenching answers to eight questions (arranged in eight chapters, by question), including: What were the main effects of your parents' divorce on your life? What do you say to those who claim that "children are resilient" and "children are happy when their parents are happy"? What would you like to tell your parents then and now? What do you want adults in our culture to know about divorce? What role has your faith played in your healing? Their simple and poignant responses are difficult to read and yet not without hope. Most of the contributors--women and men, young and old, single and married--have never spoken of the pain and consequences of their parents' divorce until now. They have often never been asked, and they believe that no one really wants to know. Despite vastly different circumstances and details, the similarities in their testimonies are striking; as the reader will discover, the death of a child's family impacts the human heart in universal ways.
An internationally renowned authority on children and divorce reveals the latest research-based strategies for helping children survive and thrive before, during, and long after their parents divorce. The breakup of a family can have an enduring impact on children. But as Dr. JoAnne Pedro-Carroll explains with clarity and compassion in this powerful book, parents can positively alter the immediate and long-term effects of divorce on their children. The key is proven, emotionally intelligent parenting strategies that promote children's emotional health, resilience, and ability to lead satisfying lives. Over the past three decades, Pedro-Carroll has worked with families in transition, conducted research, and developed and directed award- winning, court-endorsed programs that have helped thousands of families navigate divorce and its aftermath. Now she shares practical, research-based advice that helps parents: -gain a deeper understanding of what their children are experiencing -develop emotionally intelligent parenting strategies with the critical combination of boundless love and appropriate limits on behavior -reduce conflict with a former spouse and protect children from conflict's damaging effects -learn what recent brain research reveals about stress and children's developing capabilities Filled with the voices and drawings of children and the stories of families, Putting Children First delivers a positive vision for a future of hope and healing.
Emery reviews the psychological, social, economic, and legal consequences of divorce, and examines how children's risk or resilience is predicted by interparental conflict, relationships with both parents, financial strain, legal/physical custody, and other factors."--BOOK JACKET.
When a marriage ends, the most important thing divorcing parents can do is to help their children through this difficult transition and remain united as parents even if they are no longer united as a couple. In Parenting Apart divorce coach Christina McGhee offers practical advice on how to help children adjust and thrive during and after separation and divorce. She looks at all the different issues parents may face with their children of different ages, offering immediate solutions to the most critical parenting problems divorce brings, including: ·When to tell your children about the divorce and what to say ·How to create a loving, secure home if your child doesn't live with you full time ·What to do if your child is angry or sad ·How to manage the legal system, including information on family law and issues of custody ·How to deal with a difficult ex This is an invaluable resource that offers parents quick access to the information you most need at a time when you need it most.
When an adult child's marriage ends, lots of folks are hurt. The divorcing couple, of course, and their children. Until now, however, little attention has been paid to the parents of the divorcees. Temlock's examination of this sensitive topic offers parents a friendly guidebook packed with helpful information and suggestions from parents who've "been there." Her five-stage model of the divorce process for parents (Accepting the News, Rescuing Your Child, Responding to Changes, Stabilizing the Family, Refocusing and Rebuilding) will help readers stay grounded through the emotional upheavals they'll share with their children and grandchildren. This practical manual puts an arm around the shoulder of parents of divorcing adults and supports them through the difficult days of the divorce process and its aftermath.
An age appropriate story that navigates the concept of having a Mom's house and a Dad's house. This book takes the negative emotion out of the equation and assures the reader that living in two homes does not make them an outcast. The story emphasizes that a child with two homes is loved by both Mom and Dad no matter what, and that love is what makes each family special.
A paradigm-shifting model of parenting children in two homes from an internationally recognized expert. A researcher, therapist, and mediator, Robert Emery, Ph.D., details a new approach to sharing custody with children in two homes. Huge numbers of children are affected by separation, divorce, cohabitation breakups, and childbearing outside of marriage. These children have two homes. But their parents have only one chance to protect their childhood. Building on his 2004 book The Truth About Children and Divorce and a strong evidence base, including his own research, Emery explains that a parenting plan that lasts a lifetime is one that grows and changes along with children’s—and families’—developing needs. Parents can and should work together to renegotiate schedules to best meet the changing needs of children from infancy through young adult life. Divided into chapters that address the specific needs of children as they grow up, Emery: • Introduces his Hierarchy of Children’s Needs in Divorce • Provides specific advice for successful parenting, starting with infancy and reaching into emerging adulthood • Advocates for joint custody but notes that children do not count minutes and neither should parents • Highlights that there is only one “side” for parents to take in divorce: the children’s side Himself the father of five children, one from his first marriage, Emery brings a rare combination of personal and professional insight and guidance for every parent raising a child in two homes.
In many Western societies, there has been a tremendous increase in family diversity over the course of the past few decades, resulting in a considerable prevalence of non-traditional family forms. The increased instability of marital and non-marital unions entails new challenges for both parents and children. In this special issue, family studies scholars from different disciplines examine from a life course perspective how re-partnering processes work and how family relationships are rearranged in order to adapt to the altered needs and requirements of post-separation family life.
Packed with research, insights, and illuminating (and often funny) examples from Paris’s own divorce experience, this book is a “practical and reassuring guide to parting well.” —Gretchen Rubin, author of The Happiness Project Engaging and revolutionary, filled with wit, searing honesty, and intimate interviews, Splitopia is a call for a saner, more civil kind of divorce. As Paris reveals, divorce has improved dramatically in recent decades due to changes in laws and family structures, advances in psychology and child development, and a new understanding of the importance of the father. Positive psychology expert and author of Happier, Tal Ben-Shahar, writes that Paris’s “personal insights, stories, and research” create “a smart and interesting guide that can be extremely helpful for those going through divorce.” Reading this book can be the difference between an expensive, ugly battle and a decent divorce, between children sucked under by conflict or happy, healthy kids. This is “a compelling case that it’s high time for a new definition of Happily Ever After—for everyone” (Brigid Schulte, author of Overwhelmed: Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the Time).
A young boy, Ivan, experiences the early stages of his parents’ separation and finds hope in the beauty and music of nature. This tale of personal growth will provide a much-needed mirror for children in times of change -- and an important reminder for all that there’s beauty everywhere you look.