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Just as Masters and Johnson were pioneers in the study of human sexuality, so Dr. John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage. As a professor of psychology at the University of Washington and the founder and director of the Seattle Marital and Family Institute, he has studied the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over the course of many years. His findings, and his heavily attended workshops, have already turned around thousands of faltering marriages. This book is the culmination of his life's work: the seven principles that guide couples on the path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward in their approach, yet profound in their effect, these principles teach partners new and startling strategies for making their marriage work. Gottman helps couples focus on each other, on paying attention to the small day-to-day moments that, strung together, make up the heart and soul of any relationship. Being thoughtful about ordinary matters provides spouses with a solid foundation for resolving conflict when it does occur and finding strategies for living with those issues that cannot be resolved. Packed with questionnaires and exercises whose effectiveness has been proven in Dr. Gottman's workshops, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the result of Dr. John Gottman's many years of closely observing thousands of marriages. This kind of longitudinal research has never been done before. Based on his findings, he has culled seven principles essential to the success of any marriage. Maintain a love map. Foster fondness and admiration. Turn toward instead of away. Accept influence. Solve solvable conflicts. Cope with conflicts you can't resolve. Create shared meaning. Dr. Gottman's unique questionnaires and exercises will guide couples on the road to revitalizing their marriage, or making a strong one even better.
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Over a million copies sold! “An eminently practical guide to an emotionally intelligent—and long-lasting—marriage.”—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work has revolutionized the way we understand, repair, and strengthen marriages. John Gottman’s unprecedented study of couples over a period of years has allowed him to observe the habits that can make—and break—a marriage. Here is the culmination of that work: the seven principles that guide couples on a path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward yet profound, these principles teach partners new approaches for resolving conflicts, creating new common ground, and achieving greater levels of intimacy. Gottman offers strategies and resources to help couples collaborate more effectively to resolve any problem, whether dealing with issues related to sex, money, religion, work, family, or anything else. Packed with new exercises and the latest research out of the esteemed Gottman Institute, this revised edition of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.
Staying happily married has become a difficult proposition in recent times. Although the institution is still firmly embedded in our culture, divorce rates have steadily climbed since the 1960s. While some marriages are truly divorce-worthy, many other broken marriages can be saved. Recent emphasis on personal needs and greater social acceptance of divorce and alternative lifestyles may have weakened the resolve of partners to work through their problems. Furthermore, many couples may not realize that problems in their current marriages are likely to surface in other relationships. Consequently, while they may consider divorce a solution, it may in fact only be a stepping stone to the next relationship where patterns may repeat. Solving marital differences can be difficult. They tend to be linked to or caused by other problems, and that can make it hard to identify the real reasons for conflicts. Without knowing the true nature of their problems, couples cannot arrive at solutions that actually work. To understand the underlying issues that plague many marriages, the authors look to the research conducted on the subject over the past fifty years and to real life stories of success and failure to outline the major issues that detract from marital stability. Drawing on Louis Primavera’s twenty-five years in private practice as a marriage counselor, each chapter is peppered with anecdotes that every married person can relate to, and that help bring issues to life. The authors also propose frank and honest solutions that can help couples have more satisfying relationships. Anyone looking to improve their marriage will find suggestions for sussing out the underlying problems they may be experiencing and guidance for addressing those problems.
“After years of debate and inquiry, the key to a great marriage remained shrouded in mystery. Until now...”—Carol Dweck, author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success Eli J. Finkel's insightful and ground-breaking investigation of marriage clearly shows that the best marriages today are better than the best marriages of earlier eras. Indeed, they are the best marriages the world has ever known. He presents his findings here for the first time in this lucid, inspiring guide to modern marital bliss. The All-or-Nothing Marriage reverse engineers fulfilling marriages—from the “traditional” to the utterly nontraditional—and shows how any marriage can be better. The primary function of marriage from 1620 to 1850 was food, shelter, and protection from violence; from 1850 to 1965, the purpose revolved around love and companionship. But today, a new kind of marriage has emerged, one oriented toward self-discover, self-esteem, and personal growth. Finkel combines cutting-edge scientific research with practical advice; he considers paths to better communication and responsiveness; he offers guidance on when to recalibrate our expectations; and he even introduces a set of must-try “lovehacks.” This is a book for the newlywed to the empty nester, for those thinking about getting married or remarried, and for anyone looking for illuminating advice that will make a real difference to getting the most out of marriage today.
In the long-awaited follow-up to her groundbreaking, million-copy bestseller The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, Dr. Laura now focuses on how men and women need to understand and appreciate the uniqueness of masculinity and femininity; what the best ways to relate, caretake, and nurture each other are; and how to bring a marriage back from the brink of disaster. Dr. Laura asserts that in order to produce and sustain a wonderfully satisfying marriage, spouses must recognize and appreciate the polarity between the masculine and the feminine. Both husband and wife have power in the relationship, and each needs to realize this in order to ensure personal satisfaction. Using real-life examples from her call-in radio show, and giving real-life solutions, Dr. Laura focuses on the typical mistakes made by men and women in their relationships and shows how marriages can not only survive but thrive.
In Keys for Marriage, Dr. Munroe provides wisdom for building and renewing your most vital relationship on earth. Understanding the inherent, God-given design for men and women will enlighten your perspective on your spouse and help you to build a healthy, dynamic marriage. As you understand how marriage is designed to function, you will experience a changed heart, a stronger relationship, and a more joyful and fulfilling life.
“My husband and I can't seem to agree on anything!” “You spent how much!?!” “My wife's parents are driving me crazy!” ”You never listen to me!” Let's face it—even the best of marriages hit an occasional bump in the road now and then. The secret to marital bliss lies in how you and your spouse handle those bumps. In Happily Ever After, Gary Chapman, the man “who wrote the book” on how to communicate with your spouse, shows couples how to successfully navigate the six most common problems that couples face: fighting fair, negotiating change, managing money, getting along with your in-laws, raising kids, and maintaining a healthy sex life. Drawing on more than 30 years of counseling experience, Dr. Chapman provides real-world examples and practical, battle-tested advice that will help you and your spouse better understand and communicate with each other as well as grow as a couple for many years to come.
Happily Ever After—The Second Time Around! Are the scars from an unsuccessful first marriage keeping you from marrying a second time? Are you afraid of committing again—even if you think you've found the right person? Then this book is meant for you. Husband-and-wife therapists Doug and Naomi Moseley show you how to get past the disappointment of a broken marriage and take positive control of your romantic life. You'll learn to identify what went wrong the first time, overcome any lingering doubts or insecurities, and embrace the joys and rewards that only a successful marriage can offer. The second time around also brings with it the complications of past histories. Here, you'll learn the best ways to deal with: ex-spouses and in-laws, stepchildren, finances, prenuptial agreements, and much more! With the help of this book, you can let go of the past and enter into your marriage of a lifetime! "This book offers anyone seeking a healthy relationship words of hope and wisdom. It is a wonderful guide to learning how to be a good partner and how to recognize who might be appropriate for you." —Caroline Myss, Ph.D., author of the bestseller Anatomy of the Spirit "With incredible clarity, uncompromising truth, and rare, refreshing wisdom, the Moseleys have written a life-changing book that will help couples create profoundly intimate relationships." —Krysta Kavenaugh, managing editor, Marriage magazine "Changing partners without changing oneself is the chief reason for continued relationship failure. The Moseleys understand how to make the necessary changes that will ensure relational happiness." —Jon Carlson, Ph.D., Ed.D. "Through devastating honesty and open hearts, the Moseleys present very powerful, penetrating, and personal material that will help couples commit more deeply to each other and develop more fulfilling relationships." —W. Brugh Joy, M.D., F.A.C.P., author of Joy's Way and Avalanche From the Trade Paperback edition.
Today's society mocks marriage, giving a false impression that marriage can only bring dissatisfaction. Many Christians have succumbed to the teaching of the world, resulting in a higher divorce rate among Christians than secular society. However, God designed marriage to be the completion of a man and woman, and by following God's design, marriage can be joyful, satisfying and lasting. In this book, Raul Ries gives seven biblical steps that both the man and women need to take in order to have this satisfying marriage relationship.