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Sloth is a lazy and overweight dragon taking up space atop of a hoard of gold and jewels within a mountain inhabited by dwarves. One dwarf helps Sloth lose weight through diet and exercise. The grateful dragon, now able to fly, leaves the dwarf and his people a special gift. Suggested age range for readers: 4-7
Horror/comedy. The novelization of the play by the same name and Book 3 in the "Trilogy of Horrifically Half-Baked Ham". Grad student Fanny Punn is studying an antiquated town called Terror Creek. She hopes to unearth the reasons why all surrounding villages have failed over the centuries, while Terror Creek thrives. At the Athame Inn in the centre of town, Fanny meets a peculiar cast of characters. The innkeeper, Ligeia, is also a Satanic High Priestess. Dr. Audley Salmon is the resident mad scientist toiling in his mysterious lab in the basement. The inn's maid is mute and its bellboy speaks like a poor man's Poe. It is here, among this motley coven of curious eccentrics, that Fanny stumbles onto a series of startling secrets, sealing not only her fate but the fate of her friends...forevermore.
Horror/comedy. The novelization of the screenplay by the same name and Book 2 in the "Trilogy of Horrifically Half-Baked Ham". Are you looking for a hilariously gory and inappropriately explicit tale involving a man and the obsessively tidy woman he loves, his army of beloved (and talking) animal friends, a sexually timid and immature comic book shop owner, his zombie-crazed psychiatrist and a grotesque strain of mutated vampires wantonly attacking the unsuspecting citizens of Toronto? How oddly specific of you--but you're in luck! Join Robert Spavor as he wages war against these silly vampires to save the body and soul of the woman he loves in one of the goriest, most blood-stained, vulgar and ridiculous epic battles ever!
Praise for You Gonna Finish That Dragon? "Parham is at the very top echelon of American humorists, equal to Dave Barry or David Sedaris on their best day." Linton Robinson (award-winning author of Bailin') In his seventh critically-acclaimed collection, humorist Barry Parham points his Pardon Me?-o-meter at American culture, science, men & women, ferret owners, and why Paul Revere was a lousy dentist.
The attitude of a person measures the altitude of his or her success and happiness. Success, and as a resultant happiness, is not determined by how much you earn or what is your status in society. It is determined by whether or not you achieve your chosen goals in life and how you view them. Each person's goals are different. Therefore it is essential for every individual to crystallize his or her vision in order to develop his/her own paradigm and path to success. And this book presents a practical guide to achieve success and happiness in life. Much of what is written is based on the author's own experiences and the philosophy which he has developed by active interaction with others as well as the study of the writings and experiences of great personalities across the world.
Oscar is not like all the other sloths in his tropical rainforest, who are called Osos Perezosos, or Lazy Bears. Oscar is adventurous, and with the help of remarkable friends like a blue butterfly, a green lizard, a vegetarian ocelot and a clumsy anteater, he sets out on a Quest to find his long-lost Uncle Francisco, and bring him home. Oscar stows away on a sailboat run by scientists who protect Nature. With them he has many adventures and meets the Arenal Dragon, Maritza Macaw and the Spice Monkeys, a fabulous Quetzal bird, and a new best friend, a valiant sloth named Olivia. The two sloths learn about dangers which threaten the rainforest, and how children around the world are helping to protect it and all the wildlife in it. The Stowaway Sloth offers youngsters a magical adventure, fascinating wildlife lore, and hope for the future.
Annotation. An original imagination full of surprises from Beowulf to Bangladesh.
The WINGS OF FIRE saga continues! Deep in the rain forest, danger awaits...Glory knows the dragon world is wrong about her tribe. After all, she isn't "as lazy as a RainWing" -- she isn't lazy at all! Maybe she wasn't meant to be one of the dragonets of destiny, as the older dragons constantly remind her, but Glory is sharp and her venom is deadly... except, of course, no one knows it.When the dragonets seek shelter in the rain forest, Glory is devastated to find that the treetops are full of RainWings that no dragon could ever call dangerous. They nap all day and know nothing of the rest of Pyrrhia. Worst of all, they don't realize -- or care -- that RainWings are going missing from their beautiful forest. But Glory and the dragonets are determined to find the missing dragons, even if it drags the peaceful RainWing kingdom where they never wanted to be -- in the middle of the war.
The novelette based on the B-movie parody feature film "Space Zombies: 13 Months of Brain-Spinning Mayhem!" by Kevin Risk and Regan W. H. Macaulay, now available on iTunes and on DVD. This is Book 1 of the "Trilogy of Horrifically Half-Baked Ham". Even the sanest and kindest of men goes mad. But what is it that drives him to insanity? Zombies from space seeking human brains for snacks? Human-to-cat, cat-to-human thought essence switches? Monster toad beasts or starfish mutations? Duelling heads? What you are about to read is a description of the circumstances under which one man, veterinarian Dr. Vic McNaughton, goes horribly, horribly - and almost irretrievably - insane.