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This accessible guide introduces systemic mirroring, an innovative approach to understanding and managing the disruptive presence of shame in family therapy. Shame is analyzed in individual and interpersonal contexts, and in two basic problematic states—experiencing too much or too little shame—often found at the root of serious problems between children and their parents. The author offers potent conversation-based strategies for working with children, adolescents, and their families, and for working with parents to resolve their own shame issues so they can improve their relationships with their children. The author also illustrates how shame regulation can improve the bond between client and therapist and produce lasting effects as clients learn to disengage from shame. This practical resource: Offers an innovative approach to dealing with shame in therapy Integrates practical methods for use with children, adolescents, and parents Discusses how shame derails interpersonal communication Provides interventions for shame management and dealing with the state of shamelessness Shows how parents can regulate their own shame at the couple level Applies these methods to school settings Shame Regulation Therapy for Families aides the work of professionals such as psychologists, psychiatrists, social workers, and school psychologists who work with children and their families on shame management.
Chronic shame is painful, corrosive, and elusive. It resists self-help and undermines even intensive psychoanalysis. Patricia A. DeYoung’s cutting-edge book gives chronic shame the serious attention it deserves, integrating new brain science with an inclusive tradition of relational psychotherapy. She looks behind the myriad symptoms of shame to its relational essence. As DeYoung describes how chronic shame is wired into the brain and developed in personality, she clarifies complex concepts and makes them available for everyday therapy practice. Grounded in clinical experience and alive with case examples, Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame is highly readable and immediately helpful. Patricia A. DeYoung’s clear, engaging writing helps readers recognize the presence of shame in the therapy room, think through its origins and effects in their clients’ lives, and decide how best to work with those clients. Therapists will find that Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame enhances the scope of their practice and efficacy with this client group, which comprises a large part of most therapy practices. Challenging, enlightening, and nourishing, this book belongs in the library of every shame-aware therapist.
Excessive shame can be associated with poor psychological adjustment, interpersonal difficulties, and overall poor life functioning. Consequently, shame is prevalent among individuals undergoing psychotherapy. Yet, there is limited guidance for clinicians trying to help their clients deal with shame-related concerns. This book explores the manifestations of shame and presents several approaches for treatment. It brings together the insights of master clinicians from different theoretical and practice orientations, such as psychodynamics, object relations, emotion-focused therapy, functional analysis, group therapy, family therapy, and couples therapy. The chapters address all aspects of shame, including how it develops, how it relates to psychological difficulties, how to recognize it, and how to help clients resolve it. Strategies for dealing with therapist shame are also provided, since therapist shame can be triggered during sessions and can complicate the therapeutic alliance. With rich, detailed case studies in almost every chapter, this book will be a practical resource for clinicians working with a broad range of populations and clinical problems.
Fascinating patient stories and dynamic exercises help you connect to healing emotions, ease anxiety and depression, and discover your authentic self. Sara suffered a debilitating fear of asserting herself. Spencer experienced crippling social anxiety. Bonnie was shut down, disconnected from her feelings. These patients all came to psychotherapist Hilary Jacobs Hendel seeking treatment for depression, but in fact none of them were chemically depressed. Rather, Jacobs Hendel found that they’d all experienced traumas in their youth that caused them to put up emotional defenses that masqueraded as symptoms of depression. Jacobs Hendel led these patients and others toward lives newly capable of joy and fulfillment through an empathic and effective therapeutic approach that draws on the latest science about the healing power of our emotions. Whereas conventional therapy encourages patients to talk through past events that may trigger anxiety and depression, accelerated experiential dynamic psychotherapy (AEDP), the method practiced by Jacobs Hendel and pioneered by Diana Fosha, PhD, teaches us to identify the defenses and inhibitory emotions (shame, guilt, and anxiety) that block core emotions (anger, sadness, fear, disgust, joy, excitement, and sexual excitement). Fully experiencing core emotions allows us to enter an openhearted state where we are calm, curious, connected, compassionate, confident, courageous, and clear. In It’s Not Always Depression, Jacobs Hendel shares a unique and pragmatic tool called the Change Triangle—a guide to carry you from a place of disconnection back to your true self. In these pages, she teaches lay readers and helping professionals alike • why all emotions—even the most painful—have value. • how to identify emotions and the defenses we put up against them. • how to get to the root of anxiety—the most common mental illness of our time. • how to have compassion for the child you were and the adult you are. Jacobs Hendel provides navigational tools, body and thought exercises, candid personal anecdotes, and profound insights gleaned from her patients’ remarkable breakthroughs. She shows us how to work the Change Triangle in our everyday lives and chart a deeply personal, powerful, and hopeful course to psychological well-being and emotional engagement.
Informed by the principles and practices of dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), this book presents skills training guidelines specifically designed for participants with cognitive challenges. Clinicians learn how to teach core emotion regulation and adaptive coping skills in a framework that promotes motivation and mastery for all learners, and that helps clients apply what they have learned in daily life. The book features ideas for scaffolding learning, a sample 12-week group curriculum that can also be used in individual skills training, and numerous practical tools, including 150 reproducible handouts and worksheets. The large-size format facilitates photocopying. Purchasers also get access to a Web page where they can download and print the reproducible materials.
A book for psychotherapists and their clients - and for anyone who wants to make the journey from shame to unshame. Carolyn Spring, author of 'Recovery is my best revenge: my experience of trauma, abuse and dissociative identity disorder', documents in this, her second book, her journey through psychotherapy to heal and resolve trauma-based shame, which had resulted in a catastrophic mental breakdown in her early thirties and an eventual diagnosis of dissociative identity disorder (DID). She then embarked on a nearly ten year journey of psychotherapy through which she came to realise that shame had actually saved her life. However, the cost to this protective function is a life lived dissociated from feelings of joy, connection, love and belonging. This book explores Carolyn's pathway towards 'Unshame'. Suitable for both professionals and survivors alike, it is a fascinating insight into that most private and mysterious of places - the therapy room, and the mind. About the author Carolyn Spring helps people recover from trauma and to reverse adversity. She is author of numerous books and articles and has delivered extensive training throughout the UK for both dissociative survivors and professionals working with them. She set up PODS (Positive Outcomes for Dissociative Survivors) in 2010 to promote recovery from dissociative disorders. She now works more widely in the field of mental health and adversity and combines a wealth of personal experience with research in her writing and training, bringing a rare positivity and the belief that no matter what people have experienced, recovery is possible. For more information go to www.carolynspring.com.
This volume reports on the growing body of knowledge on shame and guilt, integrating findings from the authors' original research program with other data emerging from social, clinical, personality, and developmental psychology. Evidence is presented to demonstrate that these universally experienced affective phenomena have significant implications for many aspects of human functioning, with particular relevance for interpersonal relationships. --From publisher's description.
Despite the burgeoning literature on the role of the father in child development and on fathering as a developmental stage, surprisingly little has been written about the psychiatrically impaired father. In Fathers Who Fail, Melvin Lansky remedies this glaring lacuna in the literature. Drawing on contemporary psychoanalysis, family systems theory, and the sociology of conflict, he delineates the spectrum of psychopathological predicaments that undermine the ability of the father to be a father. Out of his sensitive integration of the intrapsychic and intrafamilial contexts of paternal failure emerges a richly textured portrait of psychiatrically impaired fathers, of fathers who fail. Lansky's probing discussion of narcissistic equilibrium in the family system enables him to chart the natural history common to the symptomatic impulsive actions of impaired fathers. He then considers specific manifestations of paternal dysfunction within this shared framework of heightened familial conflict and the failure of intrafamilial defenses to common shame. Domestic violence, suicide, the intensification of trauma, posttraumatic nightmares, catastrophic reactions in organic brain syndrome, and the murder of a spouse are among the major "symptoms" that he explores. In each instance, Lansky carefully sketches the progression of vulnerability and turbulence from the father's personality, to the family system, and thence to the symptomatic eruption in question. In his concluding chapter, he comments tellingly on the unconscious obstacles - on the part of both patients and therapists - to treating impaired fathers. The obstacles cut across different clinical modalities, underscoring the need for multimodal responses to fathers who fail.
This book presents Nonviolent Resistance (NVR) for trauma‐focused care, adopting a systemic and trauma‐orientated approach to aggressive and self‐destructive behaviours in young people. Based on systemic therapy methods and principles in socio‐political NVR, NVR targets aggressive and self‐destructive child behaviours in a relational way to help parents develop self‐efficacy in responding to the problematic behaviour and grow a supportive community around the family. In this book, Peter Jakob integrates the original NVR model with aspects of trauma and attachment theory, solution‐focused therapy and narrative therapy, in order to expand the efficacy of NVR in trauma‐focused work. Grounded in Jakob’s extensive clinical experience and research, the book will help the reader navigate the complexity of working across various systems in family therapy and counselling, particularly within challenging contexts such as multi‐stressed families, adoptive families, foster‐ and residential care. Method descriptions and illustrative case examples are featured throughout the chapters to ultimately help readers contribute to their clients’ (re)discovery of their internal and interpersonal resources and ultimately promote healing from trauma for everyone involved. This text is an essential resource for a wide variety of mental health professionals, social workers and family workers, as well as caregivers and managers in residential care.