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"When Joey is bitten by a rat, he goes from aspiring seventh-grader to three-inch tall rodent, and unwittingly unlocks the sword Ratscalibur"--
From the New York Times bestselling author of I Am A Genius of Unspeakable Evil and I Want to Be Your Class President “A witty mash-up of favorite fantasy motifs.”—New York Times Book Review “Ratscalibur is funny, it’s scary, and it’s sweet, like life. But it has talking rats and magic, so it’s better than life.”—Jimmy Fallon “Full of clever dialogue and hilarious puns...Don’t be surprised if this novel achieves best-seller status.” —Booklist “The only way I could’ve liked this more is if I were eleven.”—Ira Glass “A charming take on an old favorite.”—Publishers Weekly When Joey is bitten by an elderly rat, he goes from aspiring seventh-grader to three-inch tall rodent. At first, Joey is amazed by his new rat self. The city streets call to him at night. Smells that would have repelled him before are suddenly tantalizing. (A chicken bone? Yes! A squashed cockroach? Like perfume!) And wow, the freedom! But when a bout of hunger leads Joey to pull the spork from the scone, he finds himself at the center of a longtime rat prophecy. Joey has unwittingly unlocked the sword Ratscalibur; and now, it is up to him to protect his new rat friends from the evil crows who seek to destroy their peaceful kingdom. But what does an eleven-year-old know about actual swordplay? And what happens when Joey no longer wants to be a rat?
Family Guy meets Election in this hilarious young adult debut! Twelve-year-old Oliver Watson’s got the IQ of a grilled cheese sandwich. Or so everyone in Omaha thinks. In reality, Oliver’s a mad evil genius on his way to world domination, and he’s used his great brain to make himself the third-richest person on earth! Then Oliver’s father—and archnemesis—makes a crack about the upcoming middle school election, and Oliver takes it as a personal challenge. He’ll run, and he’ll win! Turns out, though, that overthrowing foreign dictators is actually way easier than getting kids to like you. . . Can this evil genius win the class presidency and keep his true identity a secret, all in time to impress his dad?
"Very few books are this entertaining to read. Even fewer are literally an active crime scene. Please help find Chapter 2. Without it, this book is nothing." -John Oliver, host of HBO's Last Week Tonight Chapter Two is Missing is a hilarious picture book mystery starring a hopelessly lost narrator, an unqualified detective, and a very sneaky janitor, who are all surprised to discover that second chapter of the very book of which they are a part is--gasp--missing! Do not be alarmed, but the second chapter of this book appears to be missing! It was here a minute ago, but now it seems to have simply walked off. Not only that, but some of the punctuation has gone topsy-turvy, a bunch of letter Ms are hiding in Chapter 5, and Chapter 45 appears to be from another book entirely! The narrator is going to need some assistance getting things in order, especially with the unhelpful detective who keeps butting in and that shifty janitor lurking about. Luckily he has you--the reader--to help! From Emmy winning comedy writer and producer Josh Lieb, Chapter Two is Missing is a hilarious whodunit, an irreverent look at storytelling, and perfect for fans of Snappsy the Alligator (Did Not Ask to Be in This Book) and The Book With No Pictures.
Newbery Awards.
Vikings meets Frostblood in this romantic historical fantasy stand-alone from author Jessica Leake. The ancient land of Éirinn is mired in war. Ciara, princess of Mide, has never known a time when Éirinn’s kingdoms were not battling for power, or Northmen were not plundering their shores. The people of Mide have always been safe because of Ciara’s unearthly ability to control her enemies’ minds and actions. But lately a mysterious crow has been appearing to Ciara, whispering warnings of an even darker threat. Although her clansmen dismiss her visions as pagan nonsense, Ciara fears this coming evil will destroy not just Éirinn but the entire world. Then the crow leads Ciara to Leif, a young Northman leader. Leif should be Ciara’s enemy, but when Ciara discovers that he, too, shares her prophetic visions, she knows he’s something more. Leif is mounting an impressive army, and with Ciara’s strength in battle, the two might have a chance to save their world. With evil rising around them, they’ll do what it takes to defend the land they love...even if it means making the greatest sacrifice of all.
Story, told in beautiful poetic prose, of the training of a present-day Navajo Indian boy who feels a vocation to become a medicine man.
The New York Times bestselling author of the Tradd Street novels delivers a gripping tale of family, fate, and forgiveness. When Piper Mills was twelve, she helped her grandfather bury a box that belonged to her grandmother in the backyard. For twelve years, it remained untouched. Now a near fatal riding accident has shattered Piper’s dreams of Olympic glory. After her grandfather’s death, she inherits the house and all its secrets, including a key to a room that doesn’t exist—or does it? And after her grandmother is sent away to a nursing home, she remembers the box buried in the backyard. In it are torn pages from a scrapbook, a charm necklace—and a newspaper article from 1939 about the body of an infant found floating in the Savannah River. The necklace’s charms tell the story of three friends during the 1930s— each charm added during the three months each friend had the necklace and recorded her life in the scrapbook. Piper always dismissed her grandmother as not having had a story to tell. And now, too late, Piper finds she might have been wrong.
In this "New York Times" bestseller, Iles probes the terrifying possibility that the next phase of human evolution may not be human at all. Alarming, believable, and utterly consuming.--Dan Brown. Now available in a tall Premium Edition. Reissue.
Ten years ago, Kate Braestrup and her husband Drew were enjoying the life they shared together. They had four young children, and Drew, a Maine state trooper, would soon begin training to become a minister as well. Then early one morning Drew left for work and everything changed. On the very roads that he protected every day, an oncoming driver lost control, and Kate lost her husband. Stunned and grieving, Kate decided to continue her husband's dream and became a minister herself. And in that capacity she found a most unusual mission: serving as the minister on search and rescue missions in the Maine woods, giving comfort to people whose loved ones are missing, and to the wardens who sometimes have to deal with awful outcomes. Whether she is with the parents of a 6-year-old girl who had wandered into the woods, with wardens as they search for a snowmobile rider trapped under the ice, or assisting a man whose sister left an infant seat and a suicide note in her car by the side of the road, Braestrup provides solace, understanding, and spiritual guidance when it's needed most. Here if You Need Me is the story of Kate Braestrup's remarkable journey from grief to faith to happiness. It is dramatic, funny, deeply moving, and simply unforgettable, an uplifting account about finding God through helping others, and the tale of the small miracles that occur every day when life and love are restored.