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MachoPoni must rescue his girlfriend, Dust, from The Land of the Undead Ponies. Unfortunately, to do so, he must become one of the undead, himself. Along the way, he encounters a pony with a mohawk, the Chill-Aid Man (who’s filled with blood), and the CuddleBears, (who have porcupine quills and like to give deadly hugs). (The illustrations are included inside the book.) This first volume of the dementedly funny 80’s nostalgia series, The Poniworld Chronicles, introduces us to MachoPoni. He’s a purple pony who tries to act tough, but has a heart of gold. And his heart has a soft spot for a female pony named Dust. He’s loved her ever since they were children, though many would call him a fool for doing so. Because most ponies would call Dust cruel and manipulative. But the part of her that MachoPoni fell in love with, is a part deep inside that she doesn’t show to others. These books are darkly humorous, twisted parodies that maybe children shouldn’t be allowed to read. They’re truly “children’s books for adults and teens,” delivered with a twisted sense of humor. The Poniworld Chronicles MachoPoni: A Prance With Death Mein Poni-Kampf: A Biography of the Leader of the Nazi Ponies My Brootal Poni: A Very Butch Poni Tale Dust in Your Eyes: An Erotic Poni Tale Mötley Hüerd, the Pony Glam Metal Band Dust on the Wind: Journey to Redemption Octopony How the Alien Pony Princess Fell in Love
Meet Brogene, a very butch equine individual who enjoys wearing a sweater tied around his neck. He once had a very traumatic episode with a fire cheese doodle, so now he just wants to live a quiet undead life. But things are about to change for him. Yes, he must go on a quest for the Dark Princess. A quest for caulk. And so he sets off for Butch Valley, a mythical valley filled with mancaves where only the extremely butch are allowed. That means, no girls! When he gets there, he has to deal with blue creatures called the Funs and the only female in their village, an odd yellow guy named Cap-Man, and oh yeah, his greatest frenemy, Dust. And at one point he acquires a magical codpiece. But even though the codpiece is cool and all, Brogene doesn’t like adventures and quests. It reminds him of the incident with the Flaming Red Giant’s fire cheese doodle. It was how he died in the first place. And that was no fun. Maybe if he can get this quest over with, he can return to the loving arms of his Princess and go on being super-butch. If you want to, you can call him bro. He likes that. This book is not recommended for children. Guess why. Because this ain’t your little sister’s book about butch undead ponies! The events of this book overlap with Dust in Your Eyes: An Erotic Poni Tale. Keywords: My Little Pony parody book The Poniworld Chronicles MachoPoni: A Prance With Death Mein Poni-Kampf: A Biography of the Leader of the Nazi Ponies My Brootal Poni: A Very Butch Poni Tale Dust in Your Eyes: An Erotic Poni Tale Mötley Hüerd, the Pony Glam Metal Band Dust on the Wind: Journey to Redemption Octopony How the Alien Pony Princess Fell in Love
The Alien Pony Princess Alisson has never been kissed, which isn’t surprising since she doesn’t even have a boyfriend. But one day she finds a hunky caveponi frozen in ice and has him thawed out. Could he be the one to help her thaw out her heart as well? Because when she asks him, it turns out he has never kissed anypony either. . .
Dorothy (of Oz) and Alice (of Wonderland) used to be lovers. But that was in the past. Sometimes though, the past has a way of coming back to haunt you. In Alice’s case, that way is a tornado summoned to snatch her from the Outside World and bring her back to Munchkinland. Alice has absolutely no intention of getting back together with Dorothy. You see, Dorothy has changed…into a pervert, a sadistic chief of the munchkin tribes, and an all around unreasonable beast! She has the audacity to ask Alice to rule by her side, keeps talking about magical sexual powers that Alice possesses… Alice wants no part of it, demands to be sent back home, and that’s when the completely unreasonable Dorothy throws Alice into some sort of twisted game that’s designed to end in a duel to the death with the Scarecrow! You wouldn’t think that would be the way Dorothy would want to woo Alice, but it is. Dorothy seems to think it’ll somehow prove how much she loves Alice, in some sort of twisted logic. See, Dorothy thinks of it as a heartfelt sacrifice of one of her favorite servants to Alice and feels that as she and Alice go through the challenges of the game together, they’ll somehow end up bonding. Alice doesn’t want to be hurt by Dorothy again and really wants nothing more to do with her. But despite all her protestations, psycho Dorothy manipulates the situation so Alice has no choice but to go along with the game. Alice wonders what she ever saw in her. She hopes she won’t end up having to kill her former crush. Keywords: free Alice in Wonderland, Through the Looking Glass, Dorothy Must Die, Wizard of Oz, Cheshire Cat, Mad Hatter, Dorothy Gale, Baum, Wicked, Gregory Maguire
From the author of Dorothy vs. Alice comes this dementedly funny reimagining of the classic tale. Alice never left Wonderland. She's trapped. She's angry. And she wants revenge. The truth is not what you were led to believe. It wasn't all "just a dream." It's a nightmare. A nightmare she can't escape, where formerly pleasant characters throw her unhappy unbirthday parties to torment her, while others like to make her cry so they can lick her tears. But one day after years of this unpleasantness, she loses her heart. Literally. Well, technically someone steals it. And she has to get it back. By any means necessary. And it's a lot easier to be ruthless now that she's heartless. Alice is fed up with all the losers of Wonderland, from the goofy Mad Hatter to the bloodthirsty Cheshire Cat to the sadistic Queen of Hearts. And Alice is tired of being so sweet and innocent, with all her dimples. She used to be a preteen, but today is her 13th birthday, and she’ll be singing unhappy birthday loudly as she delivers violent justice! Yeah, she used to be so sweet you could die. Well, now they all shall die…literally. Yes, from now on, she shall deal death with two dimples and a giggled kill line. She’ll be a super cute Angel of Death! It may be 1865, but Alice is about to go medieval. She will have her heart returned to her even if she has to kill all the citizens of Wonderland one by one… Malice in Wonderland Saga Malice in Wonderland Prequel Malice in Wonderland #1: Alice the Assassin Malice in Wonderland #2: Alice the Angel of Death Malice In Wonderland #3: Alice the Girl Who Will Tear Your Heart Out and Show It To You Before You Die Malice Hates Fairy Tales Trilogy Jabberwocky Trilogy Dorothy vs. Alice Trilogy Keywords: free Alice in Wonderland, Through the Looking Glass, Lewis Carroll, Lewis Carol, Cheshire Cat, Mad Hatter, Humpty Dumpty, Gregory Maguire, Coraline, twisted fairy tales, fairy tale retellings, reboot, horror, paranormal,fantasy, coming of age, teen, Jabberwock, Jabberwocky, Caterpillar, Tweedledum, Tweedledee, Red Queen, Queen of Hearts, Tim Burton, Serena Valentino, Wicked Queen, knight, steampunk, victorian, british, period piece, Dorothy Must Die,parody, Through the Looking Glass, The Hunting of the Snark
In the fourth volume of the Malice in Wonderland Saga, the Brothers Grimm are trying to unleash twisted fairy tale beings into Wonderland. 15-year-old Queen Malice doesn’t want to deal with them. But then Malice’s dear friend, the Mad Hatter, is kidnapped. So to save him, she’s forced to work with Cinderella, and ends up getting sucked into Fairy Tale Land. If things keep going this way, the fairy tales might eventually cross over into the outside world, where her twin, Alice, lives. Malice struggles to do the right thing, but her heart keeps malfunctioning, sending her into fits of maliciousness. Killing Cinderella would be bad, right? By the author of Malice in Wonderland. Malice in Wonderland Saga Malice in Wonderland Prequel Malice in Wonderland #1: Alice the Assassin Malice in Wonderland #2: Alice the Angel of Death Malice In Wonderland #3: Alice the Girl Who Will Tear Your Heart Out and Show It To You Before You Die Malice Hates Fairy Tales Trilogy Jabberwocky Trilogy Dorothy vs. Alice Trilogy Keywords: teens young adult fantasy paranormal historical fairy tales myths, twisted Alice in Wonderland, gothic Alice in Wonderland, Mad Hatter, Cinderella, Cheshire Cat, madness returns, free Alice in Wonderland, twisted tales, twisted fairy tales, fairy tale retellings
This second stand-alone volume of the Poniworld Chronicles shifts its attention onto one of the most controversial figures in Poniworld history, Adolf Poni. Follow him as he goes from being a child with a love of dunking cookies in milk to being a murderous adult. Find out how a strawberry milk mustache led to mass murder. This account is humorous and horrific at the same time. For mature audiences. This ain't your little sister's book about Nazi ponies. The events of this book take place several decades before volume 1 of the Poniworld Chronicles, MachoPoni: A Prance with Death. Keywords: Hitler, Nazis The Poniworld Chronicles MachoPoni: A Prance With Death Mein Poni-Kampf: A Biography of the Leader of the Nazi Ponies My Brootal Poni: A Very Butch Poni Tale Dust in Your Eyes: An Erotic Poni Tale Mötley Hüerd, the Pony Glam Metal Band Dust on the Wind: Journey to Redemption Octopony How the Alien Pony Princess Fell in Love
Now that Ember is no longer a child actor, her fame is waning and she needs a publicity stunt to revive it. So she decides to auction her virginity. But things start going downhill when the cohost of a morning show kills herself after Ember makes her announcement. Days later, Maggy, Ember’s former costar, gets caught up in a sex tape scandal. And on top of that, Ember finds herself in fear of the billionaire who bid the highest in the auction. The stress causes her to struggle with her various addictions. But her greatest addiction is to fame. Is she willing to do what it takes to keep it? Gothic Lolita Series Gothic Lolita Gothic Lolita 2: Heirloom Gothic Lolita 3: Pageant
In this strange faerie tale, Princess Leila is intrigued by the arrival of the mysterious Prince Gabriel, who comes from a kingdom where the queen sits upon the throne with a headless teddy bear. An assassination attempt by a headless knight sends them on a journey to save the prince's kingdom. The journey is complicated by a mischievous demon, and by Blondy, a rival for the prince's affections. Leila finds herself falling deeper for the prince, but soon discovers that the prince has strange secrets...By the author of SinEaster, MachoPoni, and Faerie Brace-Face.
You can't stay young and innocent forever. Journey with Mary, the violet-haired girl, as she comes of age, exploring forbidden desires and searching for the love and beauty which eludes her. With wide-eyed innocence, she gazes at all the world has to offer and discovers a bizarre world of poetry and perversity. Three others are along on a journey of discovery, and find their destinies intertwined. There is Lotus, the long-haired pretty boy, a troubled young man with strange abilities; Jasmine, his twin sister, a raven-haired seductress; and the large-breasted Tina, Mary's best friend. Shall they remain innocent or shall they seek the corruption that beckons them? Now sprouts the tender violet, Now strains the heaving bust, Before the cruel corruption, The onset of lust, And the rose's dewy petals open, Yearning, tempting just Before that sweet corruption, The onslaught of lust.