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In Radical Relations, Daniel Winunwe Rivers offers a previously untold story of the American family: the first history of lesbian and gay parents and their children in the United States. Beginning in the postwar era, a period marked by both intense repression and dynamic change for lesbians and gay men, Rivers argues that by forging new kinds of family and childrearing relations, gay and lesbian parents have successfully challenged legal and cultural definitions of family as heterosexual. These efforts have paved the way for the contemporary focus on family and domestic rights in lesbian and gay political movements. Based on extensive archival research and 130 interviews conducted nationwide, Radical Relations includes the stories of lesbian mothers and gay fathers in the 1950s, lesbian and gay parental activist networks and custody battles, families struggling with the AIDS epidemic, and children growing up in lesbian feminist communities. Rivers also addresses changes in gay and lesbian parenthood in the 1980s and 1990s brought about by increased awareness of insemination technologies and changes in custody and adoption law.
Within a society that long considered "lesbian motherhood" a contradiction in terms, what were the experiences of lesbian mothers at the end of the twentieth century? In this illuminating book, lesbian mothers tell their stories of how they became mothers; how they see their relationships with their children, relatives, lovers, and friends and with their children’s fathers and sperm donors; how they manage child-care arrangements and financial difficulties; and how they deal with threats to custody. Ellen Lewin’s unprecedented research on lesbian mothers in the San Francisco area captured a vivid portrait of the moment before gay and lesbian parenting moved into the mainstream of U.S. culture. Drawing on interviews with 135 women, Lewin provided her readers with a new understanding of the attitudes of individual women, the choices they made, and the texture of their daily lives.
A unique practical application of poststructuralist theory to lesbian mothers' narratives, Lesbian Motherhood: Stories of Becoming analyzes the personal stories of 40 lesbian mothers to discover the complex ways their sense of self is constructed in the current legal, political, and social climate. These intimate narratives are examined by using Gilles Deleuze and Felix Guattari's conceptual framework to understand subjectivities by focusing on the many flexible lines of movement that constitute subjectivities, or 'becomings.' This unique source reveals deep insight into a lesbian's construction of self through her stories about her own sexuality, parenting, and other experiences in becoming a mother. Lesbian Motherhood: Stories of Becoming challenges the assimilation/resistance perspective typically expressed by scholars of lesbian motherhood. Qualitative interviews reveal startling new perspectives to lesbian mother subjectivities viewed within the context of the legal, political, and social areas that seek to define and regulate contemporary family life. This powerful source explores in detail the discursive strategies through which lesbian subjectivities are created and recreated. Deleuze and Guattari's concept of 'becoming' provides a valuable framework for analyzing the discursive strategies employed by those participating in this study. Lesbian Motherhood: Stories of Becoming offers insightful, powerful information that is indispensable to GLBT scholars, and social theorists.
Looks at the daily realities of parenting and living as a lesbian in the United States
"This book will help your mom understand. Give it to her."—Betty DeGeneres Coming out to mom is a lesbian rite of passage. In Different Daughters, thirty mothers of lesbians come together to trace their journeys towards acceptance of their daughters. Facing their fears and confusion, prejudice and misunderstandings, they speak honesty and bravely about the difficulties and joys of life with their "different daughters." Writing about families, community, religion, grandchildren, bisexuality, transgender issues, and coming out, the authors of Different Daughters raise questions shared by all mothers: How can we accept our children for who they are? How can we love our children even when they are different from us? This updated and expanded third edition of Louise Rafkin's landmark anthology includes new stories by mothers of bisexual women and young lesbians, a sister of a lesbian, and the brave testimony of one mother whose lesbian daughter is in the process of redefining her gender.
This book studies the growing number of lesbian women embarking on parenthood after coming out. Theoretical debates about lesbian motherhood often consider its assimilative or transgressive dimensions. This book offers a different approach, contextualising lesbian motherhood in relation to sexual citizenship and hegemonic discourses of kinship
A unique practical application of poststructuralist theory to lesbian mothers’ narratives, Lesbian Motherhood: Stories of Becoming analyzes the personal stories of 40 lesbian mothers to discover the complex ways their sense of self is constructed in the current legal, political, and social climate. These intimate narratives are examined by using Gilles Deleuze and Felix Guattari’s conceptual framework to understand subjectivities by focusing on the many flexible lines of movement that constitute subjectivities, or ‘becomings.’ This unique source reveals deep insight into a lesbian's construction of self through her stories about her own sexuality, parenting, and other experiences in becoming a mother. Lesbian Motherhood: Stories of Becoming challenges the assimilation/resistance perspective typically expressed by scholars of lesbian motherhood. Qualitative interviews reveal startling new perspectives to lesbian mother subjectivities viewed within the context of the legal, political, and social areas that seek to define and regulate contemporary family life. This powerful source explores in detail the discursive strategies through which lesbian subjectivities are created and recreated. Deleuze and Guattari’s concept of ‘becoming’ provides a valuable framework for analyzing the discursive strategies employed by those participating in this study. Lesbian Motherhood: Stories of Becoming offers insightful, powerful information that is indispensable to GLBT scholars, and social theorists.
After ten years of talking about having children, two years of trying (and failing) to conceive, and one shot of donor sperm for her partner, Amie Miller was about to become a mother. Or something like that. Over the next nine months, as her partner became the biological mom-to-be, Miller became . . . what? Mommy’s little helper? A faux dad? As a midwestern, station wagon–driving, stay-at-home mom—and as a nonbiological lesbian mother—Miller both defines and defies the norm. Like new parents everywhere, she wrestled with the anxieties and challenges of first-time parenthood but experienced pregnancy and birth only vicariously. Part love story, part comedy, part quest, Miller’s candid and often humorous memoir is a much-needed cultural roadmap for becoming a parent, even when the usual categories do not fit.
A story of fertility, feminism, and family Jenn Berney was one of those people who knew she was destined for motherhood—it wasn't a question of if, but when. So when she and her wife Kelly decided to start building their family, they took the next logical step: they went to a fertility clinic. But they soon found themselves entrenched in a medical establishment that didn't know what to do with people like them. With no man factoring into their relationship, doctors were at best embarrassed and at worst disparaging of the couple. Soon Jenn found herself stepping outside of the system determined to disregard her. Looking into the history of fertility and the LGBTQ+ community, she saw echoes of her own struggle. For decades queer people have defied the patriarchy and redefined the nuclear family—and Jenn was walking in their footsteps. Through the ups-and-downs of her own journey, Jenn reflects on a turbulent past that has led her to this point and a bright future worth fighting for. With clarity, determination, and hope, The Other Mothers gives us a wonderful glimpse into the many ways we can become family.
One of the few books to explore lesbian parenting, these “hilarious, heart-wrenching, painfully honest tales of mommyhood” celebrate the ups and downs of being an LGBTQIA+ parent in the 21st century (Joey Solloway, creator of Transparent). After author Harlyn Aizley gave birth to her daughter, she watched in unanticipated horror as her partner scooped up the baby and said, “I'm your new mommy!” While they both had worked to find the perfect sperm donor, Aizley had spent nine months carrying the baby and hours in labor, so how could her partner claim to be their child's mommy? Many diapers later, Aizley began to appreciate the complexity of her partner’s new role as the other mother. Together, they searched for stories about families like their own, in which a woman has chosen to forgo her own birth experience so that she might support her partner in hers. They found very few. Now, in Confessions of the Other Mother, Aizley has put together an exciting collection of personal stories by women like her partner who are creating new parenting roles, redefining motherhood, and reshaping our view of two-parent families. Contributors include Hillary Goodridge, who was one of the lead plaintiffs in the case for same-sex marriage in Massachusetts, stand-up comedian Judy Gold, and psychologist and author Suzanne M. Johnson. This candid peek into a previously unexamined side of lesbian parenting is full of stories that are sometimes humorous, sometimes moving, but at all times celebratory. Each parenting tale sheds light on the many facets of motherhood, offering gay and straight readers alike a deeper understanding of what it means to love and parent in the twenty-first century.