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Why LGBTQ adults don’t end troubled ties with parents and why (perhaps) they should Families We Keep is a surprising look at the life-long bonds between LGBTQ adults and their parents. Alongside the importance of “chosen families” in the queer community, Rin Reczek and Emma Bosley-Smith found that very few LGBTQ people choose to become estranged from their parents, even if those parent refuse to support their gender identity, sexuality, or both. Drawing on interviews with over seventy-five LGBTQ people and their parents, Reczek and Bosley-Smith explore the powerful ties that bind families together, for better or worse. They show us why many feel obliged to maintain even troubled—and sometimes outright toxic—relationships with their parents. They argue that this relationship persists because what we think of as the “natural” and inevitable connection between parents and adult children is actually created and sustained by the sociocultural power of compulsory kinship. After revealing what holds even the most troubled intergenerational ties together, Families We Keep gives us permission to break free of those family bonds that are not in our best interests. Reczek and Bosley-Smith challenge our deep-rooted conviction that family—and specifically, our relationships with our parents—should be maintained at any cost. Families We Keep shines a light on the shifting importance of family in America, and how LGBTQ people navigate its complexities as adults.
"There is no "'till death do us part" vow between parents and children. And yet, parent-child relationships are far more enduring than the marital relationships that made this phrase famous. The life-long parent-child tie is so ubiquitous and taken-for-granted that it doesn't need an oath. This unspoken pledge is our birthright; in times of good and bad, sickness and health, parents and their children are bound for life. But, not every parent-child tie is healthy and helpful. And what's remarkable is this imperative persists even when these relationships are unsatisfactory or even deeply damaging. Why do we stay in these parent-adult child relationships? And how do we stay bonded amidst rejection and pain? This book answers these questions. Drawing on interviews with 76 LGBTQ adults and 44 of their parents, the authors explain that conflictual, rejecting, and even abusive ties with parents endure because of what they call compulsory kinship: the overarching socio-cultural forces that tell us we have to stay in this bond, no matter what. That is, what we think of as the "natural" and inevitable connection between parents and adult children is actually created and sustained by sociocultural forces of compulsory kinship. With their empirical data the authors show why LGBTQ people justify their adherence to the specific compulsory kinship, using the rationales of love and closeness, parental growth, and the uniqueness of the parent-child tie. Further, they reveal how LGBTQ people stay in difficult relationships with parents through a new type of family work called "conflict work.""--
If These Ovaries Could Talk: The Things We've Learned About Making An LGBTQ Family by JAIMIE KELTON and ROBIN HOPKINS is equal parts funny, serious, happy, sad, celebratory, cautionary, and powerful. You'll learn a lot and laugh even more along the way! Who knew making a baby could be this much fun?
Discover simple habits and easy-to-implement daily rhythms that will help you find meaning beyond the chaos of family life as you create a home where kids and parents alike practice how to love God and each other. You long for tender moments with your children--but do you ever find yourself too busy to stop, make eye contact, and say something you really mean? Daily habits are powerful ways to shape the heart--but do you find yourself giving in to screen time just to get through the day? You want to parent with purpose--but do you know how to start? Award-winning author and father of four Justin Whitmel Earley understands the tension between how you long to parent and what your daily life actually looks like. In Habits of the Household, Earley gives you the tools you need to create structure--from mealtimes to bedtimes--that free you to parent toddlers, kids, and teens with purpose. Learn how to: Develop a bedtime liturgy to settle your little ones and ground them in God's love Discover a new framework for discipline as discipleship Acquire simple practices for more regular and meaningful family mealtimes Open your eyes to the spirituality of parenting, seeing small moments as big opportunities for spiritual formation Develop a custom age chart for your family to more intentionally plan your shared years under the same roof Each chapter in Habits of the Household ends with practical patterns, prayers, or liturgies that your family can put into practice right away. As you create liberating rhythms around your everyday routines, you will find your family has a greater sense of peace and purpose as your home becomes a place where, above all, you learn how to love.
PAPERBACK ORIGINAL A stunning new photobook featuring more than fifty portraits of children brought up by gay parents in America, sixth in a groundbreaking series that looks at LGBTQ communities around the world Judges, academics, and activists keep wondering how children are impacted by having gay parents. Maybe it’s time to ask the kids. For the past four years, award-winning photographer Gabriela Herman, whose mother came out when Herman was in high school and was married in one of Massachusetts’ first legal same-sex unions, has been photographing and interviewing children and young adults with one or more parent who identify as lesbian, gay, trans, or queer. Building on images featured in a major article for the New York Times Sunday Review and The Guardian and working with the Colage organization, the only national organization focusing on children with LGBTQ parents, The Kids brings a vibrant energy and sensitivity to a wide range of experiences. Some of the children Herman photographed were adopted, some conceived by artificial insemination. Many are children of divorce. Some were raised in urban areas, other in the rural Midwest and all over the map. These parents and children juggled silence and solitude with a need to defend their families on the playground, at church, and at holiday gatherings. This is their story. The Kids was designed by Emerson, Wajdowicz Studios (EWS).
WINNER OF THE SCHNEIDER FAMILY BOOK AWARD FOR TEENS! A beautifully realistic, relatable story about mental health—anxiety, perfectionism, depression—and the healing powers of art—perfect for fans of Girl in Pieces and How it Feels to Float. Whatever you struggle with, you are not alone and you are already enough—just the way you are. It's been three months since The Night on the Bathroom Floor--when Lily found her older sister Alice hurting herself. Ever since then, Lily has been desperately trying to keep things together, for herself and for her family. But now Alice is coming home from her treatment program and it is becoming harder for Lily to ignore all of the feelings she's been trying to outrun. Enter Micah, a new student at school with a past of his own. He was in treatment with Alice and seems determined to get Lily to process not only Alice's experience, but her own. Because Lily has secrets, too. Compulsions she can't seem to let go of and thoughts she can't drown out. When Lily and Micah embark on an art project for school involving finding poetry in unexpected places, she realizes that it's the words she's been swallowing that desperately want to break through. "A tender, heartfelt, and realistic look at mental illness, familial love, and finding your voice."—Kathleen Glasgow, New York Times bestselling author of Girl in Pieces
'BRILLIANT . . . I LOVE THIS BOOK' LEMN SISSAY 'A MUST-READ BOOK' JACQUELINE WILSON 'EXTRAORDINARY' OLIVER BULLOUGH 'EVERYONE SHOULD READ THIS BOOK' HILARY COTTAM Meet the mother whose children were taken away, and the father who fought for his son. Listen to the radical social worker, the judge, the lawyer. See inside the homes of foster carers, adoptive parents and children in care. Because behind closed doors, a scandal is ongoing. We now remove more children from their parents than ever before, more than any other western country. Not because of a rise in physical or sexual abuse, but because of complex factors that are overlooked and misunderstood. Children's Care is a system where fathers are ignored, and mothers are punished for experiencing abuse. Rife with prejudices about race, ableism and class, determined by a postcode lottery. Blind to poverty and its effects on family life. And, at its very worst, an exercise in social engineering that can never replace parental love. This is not a soft issue. Not a 'women and children' problem. It is a prism through which we can understand the deepest issues at play in politics, economics and society today, and it is happening behind closed doors. Because of legal restrictions against reporting in family courts, the uneasy work of social care and the shame poured on parents, these problems remain out of our sight. They are the subject of horror headlines or stale statistics. But family life is at the heart of who we are as people, and it is they who can help us understand. From North to South, rich and poor, Black and white, these are the people who know, first-hand, what is going wrong - and how we can fix it. These are their stories. 'IMPORTANT' IAN BIRRELL 'VITAL' HANNAH JANE PARKINSON 'ONE OF BRITAIN'S BEST JOURNALISTS WRITING ABOUT SOCIAL JUSTICE' MARIANA MAZZUCATO
In 1971, Lee Myonghi, aged five, was taken from her family and placed in a Korean orphanage. Six months later, she was flown to the United States, where she and two other Korean girls were adopted by a Minnesota couple. They renamed her Kelly Jean. Eleven years later, Kelly found herself at the doorstep of a Minnesota agency, although this time as a teen mother giving her own child up for adoption. Kelly later married and had two more children. Then, in 2007, Kelly's husband found her original, Korean family, and so began a journey that reunited Kelly with the family whom she thought had abandoned her, and brought her face to face with the daughter she herself had lost twenty-five years before. Told with refreshing honesty, Songs of My Families is a moving story of two generations of women forced to make agonizing choices as they coped with harsh economic realities and personal crises. It is also an affirmation of the strength of family, the importance of one's cultural heritage, and the enduring power of love.
"There is no "'till death do us part" vow between parents and children. And yet, parent-child relationships are far more enduring than the marital relationships that made this phrase famous. The life-long parent-child tie is so ubiquitous and taken-for-granted that it doesn't need an oath. This unspoken pledge is our birthright; in times of good and bad, sickness and health, parents and their children are bound for life. But, not every parent-child tie is healthy and helpful. And what's remarkable is this imperative persists even when these relationships are unsatisfactory or even deeply damaging. Why do we stay in these parent-adult child relationships? And how do we stay bonded amidst rejection and pain? This book answers these questions. Drawing on interviews with 76 LGBTQ adults and 44 of their parents, the authors explain that conflictual, rejecting, and even abusive ties with parents endure because of what they call compulsory kinship: the overarching socio-cultural forces that tell us we have to stay in this bond, no matter what. That is, what we think of as the "natural" and inevitable connection between parents and adult children is actually created and sustained by sociocultural forces of compulsory kinship. With their empirical data the authors show why LGBTQ people justify their adherence to the specific compulsory kinship, using the rationales of love and closeness, parental growth, and the uniqueness of the parent-child tie. Further, they reveal how LGBTQ people stay in difficult relationships with parents through a new type of family work called "conflict work.""--
Don’t Leave Your Friends Behind is a collection of concrete tips, suggestions, and narratives on ways that non-parents can support parents, children, and caregivers in their communities, social movements, and collective processes. Don’t Leave Your Friends Behind focuses on issues affecting children and caregivers within the larger framework of social justice, mutual aid, and collective liberation. How do we create new, nonhierarchical structures of support and mutual aid, and include all ages in the struggle for social justice? There are many books on parenting, but few on being a good community member and a good ally to parents, caregivers, and children as we collectively build a strong all-ages culture of resistance. Any group of parents will tell you how hard their struggles are and how they are left out, but no book focuses on how allies can address issues of caretakers’ and children’s oppression. Many well-intentioned childless activists don’t interact with young people on a regular basis and don’t know how. Don’t Leave Your Friends Behind provides them with the resources and support to get started. Contributors include: The Bay Area Childcare Collective, Ramsey Beyer, Rozalinda Borcilă, Mariah Boone, Marianne Bullock, Lindsey Campbell, Briana Cavanaugh, CRAP! Collective, a de la maza pérez tamayo, Ingrid DeLeon, Clayton Dewey, David Gilbert, A.S. Givens, Jason Gonzales, Tiny (aka Lisa Gray-Garcia), Jessica Hoffman, Heather Jackson, Rahula Janowski, Sine Hwang Jensen, Agnes Johnson, Simon Knaphus, Victoria Law, London Pro-Feminist Men’s Group, Amariah Love, Oluko Lumumba, mama raccoon, Mamas of Color Rising/Young Women United, China Martens, Noemi Martinez, Kathleen McIntyre, Stacey Milbern, Jessica Mills, Tomas Moniz, Coleen Murphy, Maegan ‘la Mamita Mala’ Ortiz, Traci Picard, Amanda Rich, Fabiola Sandoval, Cynthia Ann Schemmer, Mikaela Shafer, Mustafa Shakur, Kate Shapiro, Jennifer Silverman, Harriet Moon Smith, Mariahadessa Ekere Tallie, Darran White Tilghman, Jessica Trimbath, Max Ventura, and Mari Villaluna.