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From the characterological struggle that leads to the breakup through the difficult adjustments that come after the marriage is over, this volume examines the emotional process of divorce. Illustrated throughout with evocative case examples, this book explores why marriages fail, the feelings and reactions of both the rejecting and the rejected partners, the psychodynamics of jealousy, the possibility of reconciliation, and the impact of divorce on children.
Seventy now-adult children of divorce give their candid and often heart-wrenching answers to eight questions (arranged in eight chapters, by question), including: What were the main effects of your parents' divorce on your life? What do you say to those who claim that "children are resilient" and "children are happy when their parents are happy"? What would you like to tell your parents then and now? What do you want adults in our culture to know about divorce? What role has your faith played in your healing? Their simple and poignant responses are difficult to read and yet not without hope. Most of the contributors--women and men, young and old, single and married--have never spoken of the pain and consequences of their parents' divorce until now. They have often never been asked, and they believe that no one really wants to know. Despite vastly different circumstances and details, the similarities in their testimonies are striking; as the reader will discover, the death of a child's family impacts the human heart in universal ways.
Packed with research, insights, and illuminating (and often funny) examples from Paris’s own divorce experience, this book is a “practical and reassuring guide to parting well.” —Gretchen Rubin, author of The Happiness Project Engaging and revolutionary, filled with wit, searing honesty, and intimate interviews, Splitopia is a call for a saner, more civil kind of divorce. As Paris reveals, divorce has improved dramatically in recent decades due to changes in laws and family structures, advances in psychology and child development, and a new understanding of the importance of the father. Positive psychology expert and author of Happier, Tal Ben-Shahar, writes that Paris’s “personal insights, stories, and research” create “a smart and interesting guide that can be extremely helpful for those going through divorce.” Reading this book can be the difference between an expensive, ugly battle and a decent divorce, between children sucked under by conflict or happy, healthy kids. This is “a compelling case that it’s high time for a new definition of Happily Ever After—for everyone” (Brigid Schulte, author of Overwhelmed: Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the Time).
This highly anticipated second edition of Splitting includes new chapters on abuse, alienation, and false allegations; as well as information about the four types of domestic violence, protective orders, and child custody disputes. Are you divorcing someone who’s making the process as difficult as possible? Are they sending you nasty emails, falsifying the truth, putting your children in the middle, abusing you, or abusing the system? Are they “persuasive blamers,” manipulating and fooling court personnel to get them on their side? If so, you need this book. For more than ten years, Splitting has served as the ultimate guide for people divorcing a high conflict person, one who often has borderline or narcissistic (or even antisocial) personality disorder. Among other things, it has saved readers thousands of dollars, helped them keep custody of their children, and effectively guided them through a difficult legal and emotional process. Written by a family law attorney and therapist, and the author of Stop Walking on Eggshells, Splitting is an essential legal and psychological guide for anyone divorcing a persuasive blamer: someone who suffers from borderline personality disorder (BPD), narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), and/or antisocial personality disorder (ASPD). This second edition includes new information about antisocial personalities; expanded information about domestic violence, child abuse, alienation, and false allegations; how to approach protective orders and deal with child custody disputes; and a new chapter on how to successfully present your case to decision makers. Turn to this guide to help you: Predict what your spouse may do or say in court Take control of your case with assertiveness and strategic thinking Choose a lawyer who understands your case Learn how e-mails and social networking can be used against you If you need help navigating a high-conflict divorce from a manipulative spouse, this book includes all of the critical information you need to work through the process of divorce in an emotionally balanced, productive way.
Romantic breakups inflict the greatest trauma of our lives-and their wounds can be felt for years to come. How we heal-or fail to heal-from romantic trauma has a profound effect on our future relationships: Will we act out of unresolved emotional patterns, triggered by painful memories and unhealthy reactions, or will we find healthy, healing relationships that build on the best of who we are? Healthy relationships develop from inner healing and self-acceptance. This brief, easy to read workbook-the first in a series of four teaching the reader how to engage healthy relationships-guides the reader through a five-step process of insight, healing, and recovery from breakups: Accept your need to let go. Understand how to let go. Take your emotional life seriously. Create a life without your partner. Work on your relationship with yourself. Based on the latest research, these steps help the reader identify dysfunctional relationship patterns, find internal peace, work through difficult emotions, break out of negative-thinking spirals, and find comfort and nurture in alone time. Once this work of self-nurture is accomplished, the next relationship is far more likely to be satisfying and intimate, life giving and joyful, and mutual and sustainable.
There are many books that promise to help you fix a bad relationship. This groundbreaking bestseller is the first one to help you choose whether you should even try—or if you need to go. Psychotherapist Mira Kirshenbaum draws on years of research and her work with real-life couples to help you make the right decision. She shows you how to diagnose your unique situation with self-analysis and questions like these, which get to the very heart of your problems: • What sins are forgivable and which ones are unpardonable? • Is your partner questioning your opinions to the point where you doubt yourself? • What is your sex life really like, and how important is it? • Is there real love left between you, and how does it stack up against all that you find unlovable? Mira Kirshenbaum provides expert guidelines that are the key to making all your choices, concrete steps that you can implement right now, and the ultimate way to determine your personal bottom line—what you need to be happy. This remarkably insightful and probing guide offers advice that lets you see the truth about your relationship—and with wisdom and compassion, it helps you act with the confidence of knowing that whether you decide to go or stay, you are doing the very best thing.
how do i file for divorce in india? how do i identify a good lawyer? what are the grounds on which i can file for divorce? what goes into deciding who gets custody of the children? how much alimony will i have to pay? how much does it cost? Divorce is usually painful and complex. Breaking Up: Your Guide to Getting Divorced answers every question you might have on the subject. Mrunalini Deshmukh is one of India’s top divorce lawyers, and she and her associates have handled some of the most high-profile cases in the country. Using their twenty years of experience and expertise, they have put together this book on understanding divorce law. Authoritative, simply written and easily accessible, Breaking Up will guide you through the entire process and help you get your life back on track.
When conducting parenting plan evaluations, mental health professionals need to be aware of a myriad of different factors. More so than in any other form of forensic evaluation, they must have an understanding of the most current findings in developmental research, behavioral psychology, attachment theory, and legal issues to substantiate their opinions. With a number of publications on child custody available, there is an essential need for a text focused on translating the research associated with the most important topics within the family court. This book addresses this gap in the literature by presenting an organized and in-depth analysis of the current research and offering specific recommendations for applying these findings to the evaluation process. Written by experts in the child custody arena, chapters cover issues associated with the most important and complex issues that arise in family court, such as attachment and overnight timesharing with very young children, dynamics between divorced parents and children's potential for resiliency, co-parenting children with chronic medical conditions and developmental disorders, domestic violence during separation and divorce, gay and lesbian co-parents, and relocation, among others. The scientific information provided in these chapters assists forensic mental health professionals to proffer empirically-based opinions, conclusions and recommendations. Parenting Plan Evaluations is a must-read for legal practitioners, family law judges and attorneys, and other professionals seeking to understand more about the science behind child custody evaluations.
Hey! I think you should know that there is nothing your parents are more proud of... than YOU!' This simple graphic story helps children whose parents are separating to feel better. The book says why some parents have to live in different places, reminds the child how special they are to both parents, and reassures them that both parents will keep looking after them, and love them just as before. Getting to the heart of what children need to hear in what can be a confusing time, the story lets your child know that they are loved and safe, and that this will not change. Ideal for children aged 3-7.