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This hilarious collection of humorous quotations, full of wisecracks and wit, snappy comments and inspired fantasy, has been specially compiled by the late broadcaster and raconteur Ned Sherrin, with a foreword by leading British satirist, Alistair Beaton. Now packed with even more quotes and covering more subjects than before, from Weddings to the Supernatural, Australia to Headlines. Find the best lines from your favourite jokesters and wordsmiths, add that extra something to a speech or presentation, or just enjoy a good laugh. 'A chair is a piece of furniture. I am not a chair because no one has ever sat on me.' Ann Widdecombe on the announcement that Parliamentary language will now be gender-neutral. 'No wonder Bob Geldof is such an expert on famine. He's been feeding off 'I don't like Mondays' for 30 years.' Russell Brand On deciding to run for governor of California: 'The most difficult decision I've ever made in my entire life, except for the one in 1978 when I decided to get a bikini wax.' Arnold Schwarzenegger 'Wanting to know an author because you like his work is like wanting to know a duck because you like p--acirc--;t--eacute--;.' Margaret Atwood 'I am so sorry. We have to stop there. I have just come to the end of my personality.' Quentin Crisp, closing down an interview
A stupendous collection of quotes, quips, epigrams, witticisms, and humorous comments. For personal enjoyment and ready reference.
A fine quotation is a diamond in the hand of a man of wit and a pebble in the hand of a fool. Joseph Roux This is a collection of the funniest quotes culled by the author from the thousands that are out there to save the reader the trouble of perusing the multitude of mediocre to find the best. This is a book which you can just pick up anytime and carry on where you left off last time. It is for those who want to pep up a speech, a presentation or an email and for those who just want to sit at home and enjoy the best humorous quotations for their own amusement. In the author's view the best humorous quotations are often those which contain an essence of truth viewed from an unexpected and quirky angle unseen previously.
From Oscar Wilde's witty observation in Lady Windermere's Fan that 'I can resist everything except temptation', to Zsa Zsa Gabor's admission that 'I know nothing about sex, because I was always married', and by way of Woody Allen's numerous bon mots to the anonymous definition of psychiatry as being 'the care of the id by the odd', Connie Robertson has woven together a hilarious, stimulating and thought-provoking collection of the best humorous quotations which will provide the reader with much to ponder over long after the book has been put aside.The Wordsworth Book of Humorous Quotations will delight the browser and the simply curious while also providing the student, journalist and after-dinner speaker with a wealth of valuable material.
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Award Winner in the Humor category of The USA "Best Books 2011" Awards, sponsored by USA Book News. Funny, facetious, droll, amusing, jocular, whimsical, silly, witty, hilarious, hysterical, and thought-provoking, The Little Book of Humorous Quotes is the perfect mental supplement in today's stressed-out world. Is your mind on information overload? Give yourself a break-and a laugh. This humorous collection is organized to provide laughter every day, year in and year out, to yourself and anyone you speak to. Quote it. Note It. Promote it. Or devote it. The book shares 365 exceptionally entertaining quotes from more than 100 authors- everyone from classic humorists such as Oscar Wilde, Mark Twain and George Bernard Shaw to modern wits like Woody Allen, Erma Bombeck and Phyllis Diller. These quotes put the "fun" in funny. If you believe that laughter is the best medicine, just take one book and call me in the morning.
This entertaining book presents hundreds of humorous jokes, quotations, and one-liners compiled from a variety of sources (medical literature, books, magazines, the internet, movies, television, remarks made at conferences or rounds, lectures, comic routines). The text is organized alphabetically allowing readers to browse through the book randomly, or focus on particular topics of interest. Sample subject headings include Academia, Aphorisms, Atrophy, Bedside Manner, Beepers, Case Reports, Chicken Soup, Dieting, Epitaphs, Fatigue, Health Food, Insanity, Jogging, Lab Tests, Lawyers, Middle Age, Motherhood, Night Calls, Obesity, Phobias, Quacks, Retirement, Snoring, Teenagers, Turfing, Ulcers, Vacations, Wellness, Zoonoses. There is cross-referencing throughout the book for easy location of additional topics of interest. Offers nuggets of wisdom within humorous one-liners Provides a quick laugh or pick-me-up at the end of a busy day Helps promote better communication among colleagues, students, and patients Material in this book can be used during lectures and hospital rounds, conferences, with office staff, and by speakers who need funny lines to spice up their presentations to medical professionals
Amusing, thought-provoking epigrams, aphorisms, and other jests from the plays, essays, and lively conversation of Oscar Wilde offer a feast of humorous and profound quips. Nearly 400 quotes.
"Politics is no laughing matter - unless you've got Fred Metcalf's Dictionary of Humorous Political Quotations. From the wit that made Boris a contender to the best of George W. Bush, this book will have you in stitches. Bankers to bin Laden, bumper stickers to Biden, and even a few topics that don't begin with B, Metcalf has them all covered. Churchill's gravitas meets Jon Stewart's modern parody - if you have a political (or a funny) bone in your body, you need this book. I loved it!" Louise Mensch. With this brilliant anthology of mieux mots used in the theatre of politics over the centuries, Fred Metcalf has conjured an indispensable tool for both the seasoned public speaker and the armchair quotation-collector alike. Combining politics with a liberal dose of sex, drugs and Frank Zappa, Metcalf has produced a hearty panoply of memorable political rhetoric to cover any occasion - a remedy for those improvising amid impassioned response as well as those polishing their argument with the choicest of truisms.