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This book, Are You A Dickhead?, asks the reader 100 simple questions and provides the reader with a choice of 5 circle the letter style simple answers. By answering all of the questions, the reader can create a DH Score. This enables the reader to determine whether he or she is:* A Dickhead.* Close to being a Dickhead, and if so, how close to becoming an indisputable Dickhead.* Isn't a Dickhead.Are You A Dickhead? takes a humorous but also educational look at manners and lack of manners. It looks at things that people do and don't do in Public, when Getting Around, in Relationships, and in their Brain that make them Dickheads.
This book is an ideal novelty gift for the dickhead in your life. Contains inspirational quotes to remind them that they are a dickhead.
If you have ever strived to be a dickhead, then this is the ultimate guide.We will instruct you on the intricacies of being a nob job. How can you strive to become a better or more complete 'dick head'. This book is a testimony to the fine art of being the ultimate 'dick head'.Some dickheads are just stupid, but some are real dickheads. There are lots of ways to be better at it.So fasten your belts, and prepare to master the 'dickheadness' of your inner dickhead.
Ever get the feeling that you're destined for great things, but you don't quite know how to get started? Perhaps you're stuck in a rut with life passing you by and a fear that you will die wondering what you could have achieved? If so this book is for you. Average 70kg D**khead tracks key life events of Dr Dan Pronk from his beginnings as an average chubby kid, through his failed attempt at professional triathlon, onto becoming a doctor, joining army Special Forces, being decorated for his conduct in action in Afghanistan, and then onto his post-army career as a medical executive and co-owner of a multimillion dollar business. Throughout the book Dan shares his motivational philosophies and key lessons learned from his journey. He breaks down the goal setting process and provides examples of how seemingly impossible goals can be deconstructed into smaller and smaller achievable sub-goals, creating a clear pathway to getting started and moving towards your ambitious objectives. Dan highlights the crucial factor of persistence in goal attainment and uses case studies from the Special Forces selection process to illustrate that average people with above-average persistence will beat stronger, smarter, faster, and more educated people who are not as willing to persist every time. This book will inspire you to do more. Be it to get off the couch and get started, or double down on your existing goals and supercharge your commitment to them. You only get one go at this life, so what are you waiting for? Give it a read and get going!
A compact, comprehensive, and very silly field guide featuring more than 200 of the rudest birds on earth—from the creator of the Webby Award–winning hit Instagram account! Effin’ Birds is the most eagerly anticipated new volume in the grand and noble profession of nature writing and bird identification. Sitting proudly alongside Sibley, Kaufman, and Peterson, this book contains more than 150 pages crammed full of classic, monochrome plumage art paired with the delightful but dirty aphorisms (think “I’m going to need more booze to deal with this week”) that made the Effin’ Birds feed a household name. Also included in its full, Technicolor glory is John James Audubon’s most beautiful work matched with modern life advice. Including never-before-seen birds, insults, and field notes, this guide is a must-have for any effin’ fan or birder.
The definitive guide to working with -- and surviving -- bullies, creeps, jerks, tyrants, tormentors, despots, backstabbers, egomaniacs, and all the other assholes who do their best to destroy you at work. "What an asshole!" How many times have you said that about someone at work? You're not alone! In this groundbreaking book, Stanford University professor Robert I. Sutton builds on his acclaimed Harvard Business Review article to show you the best ways to deal with assholes...and why they can be so destructive to your company. Practical, compassionate, and in places downright funny, this guide offers: Strategies on how to pinpoint and eliminate negative influences for good Illuminating case histories from major organizations A self-diagnostic test and a program to identify and keep your own "inner jerk" from coming out The No Asshole Rule is a New York Times, Wall Street Journal, USA Today and Business Week bestseller.
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • NATIONAL BOOK CRITICS CIRCLE AWARD FINALIST NAMED ONE OF THE TEN BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY MICHIKO KAKUTANI, THE NEW YORK TIMES • NAMED ONE OF THE TEN BEST NONFICTION BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY TIME NAMED ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY MORE THAN 45 PUBLICATIONS, INCLUDING The New York Times Book Review • The Washington Post • NPR • The New Yorker • San Francisco Chronicle • The Economist • The Atlantic • Newsday • Salon • St. Louis Post-Dispatch • The Guardian • Esquire (UK) • GQ (UK) After three acclaimed novels, Gary Shteyngart turns to memoir in a candid, witty, deeply poignant account of his life so far. Shteyngart shares his American immigrant experience, moving back and forth through time and memory with self-deprecating humor, moving insights, and literary bravado. The result is a resonant story of family and belonging that feels epic and intimate and distinctly his own. Born Igor Shteyngart in Leningrad during the twilight of the Soviet Union, the curious, diminutive, asthmatic boy grew up with a persistent sense of yearning—for food, for acceptance, for words—desires that would follow him into adulthood. At five, Igor wrote his first novel, Lenin and His Magical Goose, and his grandmother paid him a slice of cheese for every page. In the late 1970s, world events changed Igor’s life. Jimmy Carter and Leonid Brezhnev made a deal: exchange grain for the safe passage of Soviet Jews to America—a country Igor viewed as the enemy. Along the way, Igor became Gary so that he would suffer one or two fewer beatings from other kids. Coming to the United States from the Soviet Union was equivalent to stumbling off a monochromatic cliff and landing in a pool of pure Technicolor. Shteyngart’s loving but mismatched parents dreamed that he would become a lawyer or at least a “conscientious toiler” on Wall Street, something their distracted son was simply not cut out to do. Fusing English and Russian, his mother created the term Failurchka—Little Failure—which she applied to her son. With love. Mostly. As a result, Shteyngart operated on a theory that he would fail at everything he tried. At being a writer, at being a boyfriend, and, most important, at being a worthwhile human being. Swinging between a Soviet home life and American aspirations, Shteyngart found himself living in two contradictory worlds, all the while wishing that he could find a real home in one. And somebody to love him. And somebody to lend him sixty-nine cents for a McDonald’s hamburger. Provocative, hilarious, and inventive, Little Failure reveals a deeper vein of emotion in Gary Shteyngart’s prose. It is a memoir of an immigrant family coming to America, as told by a lifelong misfit who forged from his imagination an essential literary voice and, against all odds, a place in the world. Praise for Little Failure “Hilarious and moving . . . The army of readers who love Gary Shteyngart is about to get bigger.”—The New York Times Book Review “A memoir for the ages . . . brilliant and unflinching.”—Mary Karr “Dazzling . . . a rich, nuanced memoir . . . It’s an immigrant story, a coming-of-age story, a becoming-a-writer story, and a becoming-a-mensch story, and in all these ways it is, unambivalently, a success.”—Meg Wolitzer, NPR “Literary gold . . . bruisingly funny.”—Vogue “A giant success.”—Entertainment Weekly
Are you looking for a hilarious hen party gift, white elephant gift, or funny gag birthday present? Then Look no further than this so rude DICKHEAD coloring book for adults! This has hyper details hand drawing 25 sweary word pages that is totally obnoxious, but also hilarious in designs to help you color away any stress you may have. These are featured all ridiculously rude words you can think of from Cunt to Fuck, also rare words you may not think of like Beef curtain or Blue Waffle! Fan of the curse, offensive and swear words, this coloring book is a must-have for your collection! Product Details Printed single-sided on bright white paper Premium matte-finish cover design Perfect for all coloring mediums Large format 8.5"x11.0" (22x28cm) pages This swearing coloring book for adults is absolutely perfect for chilling and relaxing at-home activity for open-minded people. It is a great for adults who like coloring books with hysterically awful content. SCROLL UP AND GRAB YOUR BOOK TODAY!
EXHILARATING! A PARODY OF GINORMOUS PROPORTIONS! Moby Dick: or, the White Whale, was written by Herman Melville in 1851. Now considered a great American novel, it's ripe for zombification. The adventures of Fishpail aboard the randy sailing vessel P-God, commanded by a fellow called Captain Ascab, are heretofore set down as never before as the crew chases the big, fat, stinky, blubbery, white zombie whale that bit off Ascab's leg-and still hungers for his brain. Ascab is bent on revenge. Even zombie hermit crabs, undead sharks, too much Spaghetto, a sea of bad puns, foul language, and urbandictionary.com slang, cruel fart jokes, exploding gallbladders, cannibals, and parking tickets will not deter him. He will find Moby Dickhead and destroy him, because Moby Dickhead's a really big, undead dickhead. So quit your blubbering and read this classic tale. You know you've had it on your chum bucket list forever. So just do it. Now. Rated T.I., for Totally Immature
The most ordinary life can be compelling when you are a miserable sod with a bizarre world view. Especially when you have close brushes with some of the most impactful global events of the last few decades. This collection of diary entries is both delightful and perplexing as we see the world of the author from birth to death as he unwittingly offends, ponders and attempts to make sense of the idiots that surround him.At moments he is unwittingly sweet as his journey into adulthood sees his high aspirations falling short and he begins to learn to appreciate what he has rather than long for what he desires.This secret account of the author's inner-most thoughts becomes living proof that even a dickhead can be loveable.