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Apologies soothes the soul and is an acknowledgment that one party has been wronged and where the offending party is trying to right the wrong committed. Apologies have been made in an effort to revive a relationship, to placate the offended party, or to ease one's conscience. Apologies must be genuine and acknowledge the wrong done by the one making the apology. Many apologies nowadays are done in the offices of public relations firms and lack substance and genuineness. These apologies are done merely to salvage a career without considering the offended party. This book will detail the many wrongs done and the effort or lack of effort made to right the wrongs. Nations, cities, towns, and individuals stand to accuse of these wrongs. 2
Renowned psychologist and bestselling author of The Dance of Anger sheds new light on the two most important words in the English language, "I'm sorry," and offers a unique perspective on the challenge of healing broken relationships and restoring trust. Dr. Harriet Lerner has been studying apologies for more than two decades, namely, why some people won't give them. Now she offers compelling stories and solid theory that demonstrates the transformative power of making amends and what is required for healing when the damage we've inflicted (or received) is far from simple. Readers will learn how to craft a meaningful apology and avoid signals of insincerity that only deepen suffering. In Why Won't You Apologize? Lerner challenges the popular notion that forgiveness is the only path to peace of mind and helps those who have been injured to resist pressure to forgive too easily. She explains what drives both the non-apologizer and the over-apologizer, and why the people who do the worst things are the least able to own their misdeeds. With her trademark humour and wit, Lerner offers a joyful and sanity-saving guide to setting things right.
From the bestselling author of The Vagina Monologues-a powerful, life-changing examination of abuse and atonement. “A triumph of artistry and empathy.” -Naomi Klein “A crucial step forward . . . This is an urgently needed book right now.” -Jane Fonda “Courageous, transformative, and yes-healing.” -Anne Lamott Like millions of women, Eve Ensler has been waiting much of her lifetime for an apology. Sexually and physically abused by her father, Eve has struggled her whole life from this betrayal, longing for an honest reckoning from a man who is long dead. After years of work as an anti-violence activist, she decided she would wait no longer; an apology could be imagined, by her, for her, to her. The Apology, written by Eve from her father's point of view in the words she longed to hear, attempts to transform the abuse she suffered with unflinching truthfulness, compassion, and an expansive vision for the future. Through The Apology Eve has set out to provide a new way for herself and a possible road for others, so that survivors of abuse may finally envision how to be free. She grapples with questions she has sought answers to since she first realized the impact of her father's abuse on her life: How do we offer a doorway rather than a locked cell? How do we move from humiliation to revelation, from curtailing behavior to changing it, from condemning perpetrators to calling them to reckoning? What will it take for abusers to genuinely apologize? Remarkable and original, The Apology is an acutely transformational look at how, from the wounds of sexual abuse, we can begin to re-emerge and heal. It is revolutionary, asking everything of each of us: courage, honesty, and forgiveness.
The Art of a Genuine Apology is all about three things Learning, Healing and Growing. It highlights where unhelpful and hurtful interactions start and describes how to address hurtful situations with confidence. You will learn about what is missing from inadequate apologies, what is standing in the way of you offering a Genuine Apology and most importantly how to move forward differently. It features an Apology Quiz, stories to illustrate the content as well as questions and suggestions for you to reflect on. 'The Art of A Genuine Apology' helps us to know ourselves deeply and be intentional about how we relate to others.
“I said I was sorry!” Even in the best of relationships, all of us make mistakes. We do and say things we later regret and hurt the people we love most. So we need to make things right. But simply saying you’re sorry is usually not enough. In this book, #1 New York Times bestselling author Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas unveil new ways to effectively approach and mend fractured relationships. Even better, you’ll discover how meaningful apologies provide the power to make your friendships, family, and marriage stronger than ever before. When Sorry Isn’t Enough will help you . . . Cool down heated arguments Offer apologies that are fully accepted Rekindle love that has been dimmed by pain Restore and strengthen valuable relationships Trade in tired excuses for honesty, trust, and joy *This book was previously published as The Five Languages of Apology. Content has been significantly revised and updated.
Apologies can be profoundly meaningful, yet many gestures of contrition - especially those in legal contexts - appear hollow and even deceptive. Discussing numerous examples from ancient and recent history, I Was Wrong argues that we suffer from considerable confusion about the moral meanings and social functions of these complex interactions. Rather than asking whether a speech act 'is or is not' an apology, Smith offers a highly nuanced theory of apologetic meaning. Smith leads us though a series of rich philosophical and interdisciplinary questions, explaining how apologies have evolved from a confluence of diverse cultural and religious practices that do not translate easily into secular discourse or gender stereotypes. After classifying several varieties of apologies between individuals, Smith turns to apologies from collectives. Although apologies from corporations, governments, and other groups can be quite meaningful in certain respects, we should be suspicious of those that supplant apologies from individual wrongdoers.
From the Theodor Seuss Geisel Award–winning creators of See the Cat: Three Stories About a Dog comes a funny and handy guide that explains just how (and how not!) to say “I’m sorry.” Wouldn’t the world be a better place if everyone knew how to apologize? Luckily, this humorous guidebook is full of practical tips about when, why, and how to say you’re sorry. From a porcupine who accidentally popped his friend’s balloon to a snail who was running so fast he stepped on a sloth’s toes, hilarious examples and sweet illustrations abound. For both listeners who are just learning and older readers who need a refresher, this book will come as a welcome reminder that even though apologizing can be hard, it doesn’t have to be complicated.
"Fresh and useful . . . excellent practical advice . . . thorough and lucid . . . will be welcomed by many who have struggled to ask forgiveness and to forgive." -Publishers Weekly A finalist in the Books for a Better Life Awards competition! Discover the healing power of apology and put its magic to work in your life Do you have a difficult time apologizing or are you involved with someone who does? Do you tend to overapologize and appear weak in others' eyes? Do you want to reconcile with someone but feel they owe you an apology first? Do you need to apologize or make amends to someone but don't know how to go about it? In this inspiring book from internationally acclaimed therapist and self-improvement author Beverly Engel, you will learn why some people have difficulty apologizing while others tend to overapologize. You'll learn how to give a meaningful apology, how to ask for one, and how to receive one. From making amends with those you have hurt to dealing with someone who refuses to apologize to teaching children responsibility and empathy, this life-changing book shows you how to bring a healing new element of renewal into every relationship in your life. "Beverly Engel has eloquently explained the power of apology in a remarkably insightful and perceptive manner. No one has been better able to explain what an apology means and its role in reconciliation." -Rabbi Charles A. Klein, author of How to Forgive When You Can't Forget: Healing Our Personal Relationships "Readers of this wise and lucid guide to the neglected art of authentic apology will acquire a powerful tool to help repair relationships with others and with themselves." -Jeanne Safer, Ph.D., author of Forgiving and Not Forgiving: A New Approach to Resolving Intimate Betrayal "An engaging and in-depth book on a subject that has rarely been addressed so intelligently and thoroughly. Ms. Engel offers the reader specific suggestions that can help you improve all your relationships." -Steven Farmer, M.F.T., author of Adult Children of Abusive Parents
The astonishing, powerful debut by the winner of a 2016 Whiting Writers' Award WHEREAS her birth signaled the responsibility as mother to teach what it is to be Lakota therein the question: What did I know about being Lakota? Signaled panic, blood rush my embarrassment. What did I know of our language but pieces? Would I teach her to be pieces? Until a friend comforted, Don’t worry, you and your daughter will learn together. Today she stood sunlight on her shoulders lean and straight to share a song in Diné, her father’s language. To sing she motions simultaneously with her hands; I watch her be in multiple musics. —from “WHEREAS Statements” WHEREAS confronts the coercive language of the United States government in its responses, treaties, and apologies to Native American peoples and tribes, and reflects that language in its officiousness and duplicity back on its perpetrators. Through a virtuosic array of short lyrics, prose poems, longer narrative sequences, resolutions, and disclaimers, Layli Long Soldier has created a brilliantly innovative text to examine histories, landscapes, her own writing, and her predicament inside national affiliations. “I am,” she writes, “a citizen of the United States and an enrolled member of the Oglala Sioux Tribe, meaning I am a citizen of the Oglala Lakota Nation—and in this dual citizenship I must work, I must eat, I must art, I must mother, I must friend, I must listen, I must observe, constantly I must live.” This strident, plaintive book introduces a major new voice in contemporary literature.
Since the 1990s we witness a rise in public apologies. Are we living in the ‘Age of Apology’? Interesting research questions can be raised about the opportunity, the form, the meaning, the effectiveness and the ethical implications of public apologies. Are they not merely a clever and easy device to escape real and tangible responsibility for mistakes or wrong done? Are they not at risk to become well-rehearsed rituals that claim to express regret but, in fact, avoid doing so? In a joint interdisciplinary effort, the contributors to this book, combining findings from their specific fields of research (legal, religious, political, linguistic, marketing and communication studies), attempt to articulate this tension between ritual and sincere regret, between the discourse and the content of apologies, between excuses that pretend and regret that seeks reconciliation.