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Don't be angry all the time! Sage advice for an Angry Man. Has uncontrollable rage driven away your children, led to your divorce, and left you alone, filled with remorse? Do you wonder if you will ever cope with your explosive rage, get through your pain, lead a physically healthy, emotionally positive, spiritual life? Like many middle-aged men who experienced alienation from their children or bitter divorce, Troy Alfeo shows that his personal tragedies could have been avoided if he had seen the patterns of his explosive rage and uncontrollable anger beforehand. He shows how years of such behavior eventually left him totally isolated, alone, and cut off from the ones he loved. He speaks frankly about the violence that he visited upon his loved ones and friends. This a book about anger so destructive that those he loved were forced to stay away from him out of fear. It is also a story about redemption and the attempts to repair these broken relationships. The author provides a road map back to normalcy, some cognitive behavioral therapy, as well as a number of positive steps you can incorporate in your life right now that will help you come to terms with your own inner Angry Man. The author recognizes the damage one's angry behavior causes to relationships and that it may not be repairable. The author maintains there are tools for dealing with this specific challenge, too, especially estrangement from one's own children. He provides practical, concise guidance on how to deal with this particular problem and notes that if you have suffered from it, the most difficult part of your journey back to normalcy may be that you might not ever see or hear from your children ever again. The author posits, "What are you going to do when that happens?" Troy Alfeo provides a solution that works for him. The author freely admits that although he is still a very Angry Man by temperament, it is now a beast under his control, not controlling him. He has successfully started on the road to anger management and has slowly begun to rekindle lost relationships with his estranged children. Succinct and to the point, Troy Alfeo discusses the following topics: Life has no "do-overs." If you have screwed up your family relationships, you are stuck with it. Own it and embrace it. Your life will be better for it. Angry emotions make you stupid. Don't believe it? Read what happened to Troy Alfeo when he interacted with his children under a dark cloud of rage. Your anger will alienate you from everyone. Put simply, people will not want to be around you, and they may even eventually come around to hate you. You might even get fired from your job. That happened to Troy Alfeo too. Did you even love your wife? No? Is that why you were angry? When did the emotional distance between you and your spouse begin? Do you know? Do your children hate you now? How do you fix and change that? Why divorce is the worst thing that could ever happen to your children. So avoid it! Coping strategies, to include developing a life of meaning and finding love again. Solutions for today that you wished you had known about yesterday. 118
Buddhism has been applied to everything from parenting to golf, but until now no one has offered Buddhist principles as a healing path through divorce. In Storms Can't Hurt the Sky, Gabriel Cohen bravely delves into his personal experience-along with insights from Buddhist masters, parables, humor, social science studies, and interviews with other divorces-to provide a practical and very helpful guide to surviving the pain of any break-up. Focusing on the emotions most common in the dissolution of a relationship-anger, resentment, loss, and grief -- Storms Can't Hurt the Sky shows how thinking about these feelings in surprisingly different ways can lead to a radically better experience. This compulsively readable book offers sound advice and much-needed empathy for anyone dealing with a break-up.
When an adult child's marriage ends, lots of folks are hurt. The divorcing couple, of course, and their children. Until now, however, little attention has been paid to the parents of the divorcees. Temlock's examination of this sensitive topic offers parents a friendly guidebook packed with helpful information and suggestions from parents who've "been there." Her five-stage model of the divorce process for parents (Accepting the News, Rescuing Your Child, Responding to Changes, Stabilizing the Family, Refocusing and Rebuilding) will help readers stay grounded through the emotional upheavals they'll share with their children and grandchildren. This practical manual puts an arm around the shoulder of parents of divorcing adults and supports them through the difficult days of the divorce process and its aftermath.
Grief overload is what you feel when you experience too many significant losses all at once, in a relatively short period of time, or cumulatively. In addition to the deaths of loved ones, such losses can also include divorce, estrangement, illness, relocation, job changes, and more. Our minds and hearts have enough trouble coping with a single loss, so when the losses pile up, the grief often seems especially chaotic and defeating. The good news is that through intentional, active mourning, you can and will find your way back to hope and healing. This compassionate guide will show you how.
A compassionate, shame-free guide for your darkest days “A one-of-a-kind book . . . to read for yourself or give to a struggling friend or loved one without the fear that depression and suicidal thoughts will be minimized, medicalized or over-spiritualized.”—Kay Warren, cofounder of Saddleback Church What happens when loving Jesus doesn’t cure you of depression, anxiety, or suicidal thoughts? You might be crushed by shame over your mental illness, only to be told by well-meaning Christians to “choose joy” and “pray more.” So you beg God to take away the pain, but nothing eases the ache inside. As darkness lingers and color drains from your world, you’re left wondering if God has abandoned you. You just want a way out. But there’s hope. In I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die, Sarah J. Robinson offers a healthy, practical, and shame-free guide for Christians struggling with mental illness. With unflinching honesty, Sarah shares her story of battling depression and fighting to stay alive despite toxic theology that made her afraid to seek help outside the church. Pairing her own story with scriptural insights, mental health research, and simple practices, Sarah helps you reconnect with the God who is present in our deepest anguish and discover that you are worth everything it takes to get better. Beautifully written and full of hard-won wisdom, I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die offers a path toward a rich, hope-filled life in Christ, even when healing doesn’t look like what you expect.
Pull away from the things that pull you down and find lasting encouragement for today. The women at Proverbs 31 Ministries offer 100 devotions of wit, wisdom, and encouragement for women. For twenty years the P31 team has equipped and encouraged nearly a million women to live in the power of God’s truths that apply to their everyday life. Written by women from every walk of life, you will find inspiration to live authentically and fully grounded in the Word of God. The P31 Team shares from the realities of everyday life including highs and lows, humorous stories and tender moments. You will be drawn toward the truths God offers and enabled to rise above and become all God created you to be.
Smile! It's not just the end of your marriage, it's the beginning of your second chance!Missy Benson has a two and a half carat diamond engagement ring with color grade H, VS2 clarity and a value of $36,000. It's absolutely gorgeous, practically flawless, and let's be honest, really big!But what the successful Chicago realtor doesn't have anymore is a husband. After 12 years of marriage, her husband, Paul, a handsome, wealthy attorney has devastated her by breaking up their marriage for Priscilla Sommerfeld, a young, personal trainer, who according to Missy's sassy assistant, J.J., looks more like a Las Vegas stripper than a fitness expert.Not sure what to do with her ring, and with no financial issues to worry about, Missy decides to put it up for sale on Craigslist. The price: 99 cents! The catch: She gets to pick the buyer. In essence, she's looking for the perfect guy, but not for herself. Her hope is to regain faith that good men do exist, and that marriages can last forever.Now referring to herself as "the divorced girl," Missy interviews dozens of young men who are vying for the huge ring. It's a contest that includes outrageous characters, hilarious and sentimental stories, and two finalists, both of whom Missy adores and who she must choose between. Then there's Parker Missoni, the sexiest contestant by far, who drives her crazy with his brutal honesty, and at the same time stops her heart with his deep brown eyes.Divorced Girl Smiling is the story of a woman's journey to do whatever it takes to heal herself from divorce. It's about acceptance, reflection, taking accountability for mistakes, and appreciating all of life's wonderful gifts. In other words, if you have the guts to put the past behind, admit your mistakes, embrace your future, and give love another chance, you will surely be a divorced girl smiling.
When a loved one dies we mourn our loss. We take comfort in the rituals that mark the passing, and we turn to those around us for support. But what happens when there is no closure, when a family member or a friend who may be still alive is lost to us nonetheless? How, for example, does the mother whose soldier son is missing in action, or the family of an Alzheimer's patient who is suffering from severe dementia, deal with the uncertainty surrounding this kind of loss? In this sensitive and lucid account, Pauline Boss explains that, all too often, those confronted with such ambiguous loss fluctuate between hope and hopelessness. Suffered too long, these emotions can deaden feeling and make it impossible for people to move on with their lives. Yet the central message of this book is that they can move on. Drawing on her research and clinical experience, Boss suggests strategies that can cushion the pain and help families come to terms with their grief. Her work features the heartening narratives of those who cope with ambiguous loss and manage to leave their sadness behind, including those who have lost family members to divorce, immigration, adoption, chronic mental illness, and brain injury. With its message of hope, this eloquent book offers guidance and understanding to those struggling to regain their lives. Table of Contents: 1. Frozen Grief 2. Leaving without Goodbye 3. Goodbye without Leaving 4. Mixed Emotions 5. Ups and Downs 6. The Family Gamble 7. The Turning Point 8. Making Sense out of Ambiguity 9. The Benefit of a Doubt Notes Acknowledgments Reviews of this book: You will find yourself thinking about the issues discussed in this book long after you put it down and perhaps wishing you had extra copies for friends and family members who might benefit from knowing that their sorrows are not unique...This book's value lies in its giving a name to a force many of us will confront--sadly, more than once--and providing personal stories based on 20 years of interviews and research. --Pamela Gerhardt, Washington Post Reviews of this book: A compassionate exploration of the effects of ambiguous loss and how those experiencing it handle this most devastating of losses ... Boss's approach is to encourage families to talk together, to reach a consensus about how to mourn that which has been lost and how to celebrate that which remains. Her simple stories of families doing just that contain lessons for all. Insightful, practical, and refreshingly free of psychobabble. --Kirkus Review Reviews of this book: Engagingly written and richly rewarding, this title presents what Boss has learned from many years of treating individuals and families suffering from uncertain or incomplete loss...The obvious depth of the author's understanding of sufferers of ambiguous loss and the facility with which she communicates that understanding make this a book to be recommended. --R. R. Cornellius, Choice Reviews of this book: Written for a wide readership, the concepts of ambiguous loss take immediate form through the many provocative examples and stories Boss includes, All readers will find stories with which they will relate...Sensitive, grounded and practical, this book should, in my estimation, be required reading for family practitioners. --Ted Bowman, Family Forum Reviews of this book: Dr. Boss describes [the] all-too-common phenomenon [of unresolved grief] as resulting from either of two circumstances: when the lost person is still physically present but emotionally absent or when the lost person is physically absent but still emotionally present. In addition to senility, physical presence but psychological absence may result, for example, when a person is suffering from a serious mental disorder like schizophrenia or depression or debilitating neurological damage from an accident or severe stroke, when a person abuses drugs or alcohol, when a child is autistic or when a spouse is a workaholic who is not really 'there' even when he or she is at home...Cases of physical absence with continuing psychological presence typically occur when a soldier is missing in action, when a child disappears and is not found, when a former lover or spouse is still very much missed, when a child 'loses' a parent to divorce or when people are separated from their loved ones by immigration...Professionals familiar with Dr. Boss's work emphasised that people suffering from ambiguous loss were not mentally ill, but were just stuck and needed help getting past the barrier or unresolved grief so that they could get on with their lives. --Asian Age Combining her talents as a compassionate family therapist and a creative researcher, Pauline Boss eloquently shows the many and complex ways that people can cope with the inevitable losses in contemporary family life. A wise book, and certain to become a classic. --Constance R. Ahrons, author of The Good Divorce A powerful and healing book. Families experiencing ambiguous loss will find strategies for seeing what aspects of their loved ones remain, and for understanding and grieving what they have lost. Pauline Boss offers us both insight and clarity. --Kathy Weingarten, Ph.D, The Family Institute of Cambridge, Harvard Medical School
"The only self-help book you'll ever need, from a psychiatrist who will help you put aside your unrealistic wishes, stop trying to change things you can't change, and do the best with what you can control--the first steps to solving all of life's impossible problems"--
Pastor John Piper shows how to sever the clinging roots of sin that ensnare us, including anxiety, pride, shame, impatience, covetousness, bitterness, despondency, and lust in Battling Unbelief. When faith flickers, stoke the fire. No one sins out of duty. We sin because it offers some promise of happiness. That promise enslaves us, until we believe that God is more desirable than life itself (Psalm 63:3). Only the power of God’s superior promises in the gospel can emancipate our hearts from servitude to the shallow promises and fleeting pleasures of sin. Delighting in the bounty of God’s glorious gospel promises will free us for a less sin-encumbered life, to the glory of Christ. Rooted in solid biblical reflection, this book aims to help guide you through the battles to the joys of victory by the power of the gospel and its superior pleasure.