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Born into an extraordinarily talented family, 29-year-old Michael Van Allen is the gay son of a well-known concert pianist and an equally famous painter. All his life, he has yearned for the talent and creativity that should have been his birthright but have somehow been denied him. When he wakes up in a mental hospital, his memory gone, his former life erased, his doctor tells him of his screaming breakdown during one of his father's performances. Van Allen's Ecstasy is the story of Michael's journey in search of his former self. As he pieces together his forgotten life, Michael uncovers jealousy, obsession, and secret desires that threaten to destroy his sanity once again.
This unique collaboration between a musicologist and two pianists – all experts in Russian music – takes a fresh look at the supercharged music and polarizing reception of the Russian composer Alexander Scriabin. From his Chopin-inspired miniatures to his genre-bending symphonies and avant-garde late works, Scriabin left a unique mark on music history. Scriabin’s death centennial in 2015 brought wider exposure and renewed attention to this pioneering composer. Music lovers who are curious about Scriabin have been torn between specialized academic studies and popular sources that glamorize his interests and activities, often at the expense of historical accuracy. This book bridges the divide between these two branches of literature, and brings a modern perspective to his music and legacy. Drawing on archival materials, primary sources in Russian, and recently published books and articles, Part One details the reception and performance history of Scriabin’s solo piano and orchestral music. High quality recordings are recommended for each piece. Part Two explores four topics in Scriabin’s reception: the myths generated by Scriabin’s biographers, his claims to synaesthesia or “color-hearing,” his revival in 1960s America as a proto-Flower Child, and the charges of anti-Russianness leveled against his music. Part Three investigates stylistic context and performance practice in the piano music, and considers the domains of sound, rhythm, and harmony. It offers interpretive strategies for deciphering Scriabin’s challenging scores at the keyboard. Students, scholars, and music enthusiasts will benefit from the historical insights offered in this interdisciplinary book. Armed with this knowledge, readers will be able to better appreciate the stylistic innovations and colorful imagination of this extraordinary composer.
Gay men and lesbians present humorous and hard-hitting accounts of the need to belong . . . somewhere Why would a lesbian raised in a Jewish home have a sudden desire to be a tough-talking Catholic girl? And why would a gay man travel to Ireland in a desperate attempt to escape his “hillbilly” roots? Identity Envy—Wanting to Be Who We’re Not explores the connections gay men and lesbians have to religions, races, ethnicities, classes, families of origin, and genders not their own. This unique anthology takes both humorous and serious looks at the identities of others as queer writers explore their own identity envies in personal essays, memoirs, and other creative nonfiction. Gay men, lesbians, bisexuals, transgendered, intersex, and other sexual minorities often feel marginalized by mainstream culture and have a need to belong somewhere, to claim a group as their own. This surprising book presents stories of identity envy that are humorous and hard-hitting, poignant and provocative, written with energy, wit, and candor by many of your favorite writers-and some exciting newcomers. Identity Envy—Wanting to Be Who We’re Not includes: Gerard Wozek’s King Fu-infused “Chasing the Grasshopper” Max Pierce’s fantasy of being a “Child Star” that helped him through a troubled family life Lori Horvitz’s “Shiksa in my Living Room” D. Travers Scott's “EuroTex” Perry Brass's “A Serene Invisibility: Turning Myself into a Christian Girl” Jim Tushinski’s ode to Lost in Space, “The Perfect Space Family” Al Cho’s unlikely identification with Laura Ingalls Wilder characters, “Farmer Boy” Irish-American John Gilgun wishes he could be one of those “Italian-American Boys” Joan Annsfire rejects her Jewish heritage to become Catholic schoolgirl Corinne O'Donnell in “The Promise of Redemption” Andrew Ramer’s “Tales of a Male Lesbian” city slicker Mike McGinty’s life with the cattle folk, “You Picked a Fine Time to Leave Me, Helen” and much more! Identity Envy—Wanting to Be Who We’re Not is a must-read for anyone who appreciates good writing—especially gay and lesbian readers who know what it’s like to wish you were someone else.
Donald Strachey finds the grandson of the godfather of Albany's political machine dead--in Donald's car. When he finds a letter on the corpse specifically asking for his help, Donald, a gay P.I., does his best to fulfill the dead man's mission-even at the risk of his own life. From the author of Third Man Out.
A Perfect Scar and Other Stories is a whimsical, sly, and slightly crazy collection of short stories from award-winning novelist, poet, and songwriter Trebor Healey. These 12 tales cover a lot of ground, including AIDS, aging, death, eroticism, tattoos, and multiculturalism--all told with humor, insight, and Healey's rich, lyrical touch.
"'Jesus instructed us to forgive those who have wronged us seventy times seven times,' Brother Vito Fortunato teaches the boys in his high school religion class, but it's Vito himself who has the most trouble with forgiveness: trying to forgive the Church, the gay community, and most of all, himself. Just a few months from his final vows as a Brother in the Catholic Church, Vito finds himself at a crossroads, torn between his spirituality and his sexuality as a fully out and proud gay man. Will a summer of volunteer work at an AIDS center in San Francisco--and a love affair with Gabriel, a recently divorced landscaper--help Vito decide his calling--and his future?"--Page 4 of cover.
"Independent Queer Cinema collects 100 of Kramer’s reviews and interviews (from 1999 to 2004) that celebrate the latest “queer wave” of actors, writers, and directors. These are films and filmmakers to be discovered and discussed—from the independent American hit Kissing Jessica Stein and the provocative foreign gem Come Undone, to tantalizing insights from Stephen Fry and Tilda Swinton. Independent Queer Cinema is a valuable reference guide as well as an entertaining compilation of Kramer’s astute reviews and interviews."--pub. description.
A touching and darkly hilarious novel about a man granted a drug-based reprieve from his HIV death sentence. Ed Dell is gay, single and confidante to goddess Oprah Winfrey--at least in his fertile imagination. He writes for a Chicago newspaper, takes care of his ailing parents, and likes to annoy his snobbish sister. HIV-positive and very private, Ed has seen better days. With the new drugs working--and with his parental obligations miraculously vanished--he suddenly, surprisingly has the chance to live again. If only he could remember how...--From publisher description.
Smart, sassy, and full of surprises, Friends, Lovers, and Roses follows three gay African-American couples (and their Puerto Rican confidant) through the twists and turns of building (and sometimes, destroying) relationships. Their stories-funny one moment, frightening the next-reveal the hard truths about the journey from lust to love and about the choices we make along the way. This fast-moving romantic drama swings from intense to inspiring and back again in a heartbeat as David, Allen, Stephen, Jamal, Serafina, Dominique (and Damien) struggle.
This unique book celebrates a long-term, interracial relationship and details the everyday struggles of a surviving partner trying to carry on in a radically changed world. A Season of Grief chronicles the author's emotional descent after the violent death of his partner of 21 years. Bill Valentine's journal of fear, anger, denial, and loneliness captures the glimmers of hope, moments of serendipity, and mysterious coincidences that emerged from his full-time devotion to grief following the death of Joe Lopes. Lopes died along with 264 others when American Airlines Flight 587 crashed in November 2001 in route to the Dominican Republic. It was the second deadliest accident in U.S. aviation history. He is a word always on my lips as I try to work him into a conversation. He is a memory that I strive to keep alive. So yes, in this sense, he is not gone. But in reality, he is. He is gone as my lover. He is gone as my life partner. He is gone as my soul mate, the only person to whom I periodically bared my soul. He is gone as my best friend, the only person to whom I ever attached that label. So pardon me while I still hang on to the notion that he is not here with me. Pardon me while I cling stubbornly to the insistence that he is gone. Valentine's candid and thoughtful account of his heartbreaking efforts to make sense of his partner's deathand survive in a world without himis by turns, funny, frightening, sobering, and surprising. In the nine months following the tragedy of Flight 587, Valentine finds every waking moment of his life affected by his partner's absencefrom mundane household chores to major life decisions. A Season of Grief is a story told in darkness and light, of hurt and healing, love and loneliness, but mostly, of a man who learns to live with his partner's absence through the persistent, surprising evidence of his presence. Our job on earth is to live with uncertainty, ambiguity, and hope. We are given a limited tool set but one, in my opinion, that's sufficient for the job. Sufficient to allow us to be engaged in life-to love, grieve, work, play, celebrate, and despair. We have a remarkable ability to rebound and grow. We have been granted the capacity for wonder and laughterespecially at ourselves. These last two gifts were bestowed generously on Joe and he, in turn, taught me how vital they are. Making a strong case for gay marriage, A Season of Grief chronicles Valentine's struggles to be recognized as a surviving spouse, including a historic lawsuit with Lambda Legal Defense and Education fund against the New York State Workers Compensation Board. Valentine and Lopes took every conceivable step to formalize their relationship, including New York City Domestic Partnership, but the Workers Compensation Board and a New York State appeals court refused to recognize Valentine as a legal surviving spouse. Grief doesn't come with a set of instructions. But A Season of Grief can help guide you through the lonely journey that follows the death of a loved one. Valentine's memoir is a testament to the healing power of reality and the enduring nature of love.