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All the looniest, wackiest, zaniest grossest jokes, games, puzzles and pranks a kid could ever want in one fun book! Uncle John is back with another For Kids Only masterpiece! Book of Fun is stuffed with wacky facts, gross-out jokes, goofy games, magic tricks, puzzling puzzles, and hilarious pranks. Easy-to-read stories and gags are brought to life with silly illustrations and fun fonts (which research suggests actually help kids build reading and comprehension skills). A sample of the fun to be had: * How to make your own whoopee cushion * Simple calculator tricks to amaze your friends * Classic riddles and mind-boggling brain teasers * Tongue twisters and word games * One-minute mysteries * Silly science tricks * Optical illusions * Lots of jokes . . . like this one: Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils? A: Because they have big fingers. And much, much more!
Horror, history, science, mystery . . . and eerily twisted tales. Follow Uncle John into a world so frighteningly funny it could only come from the Bathroom Readers Institute. What do you get when you cross a classic scary story such as “The Tell-tale Heart” with Uncle John’s trademark sense of humor? You get “The Tell-tale Fart” (Pee-uw!). And that’s just one of many twisted classic and original tales of humor and horror you’ll find inside The Haunted Outhouse. You’ll also find a spine-tingling collection of facts about topics such as real-life mad scientists, history’s terrible tyrants, and the world’s deadliest weather. Uncle John’s scare-fest is packed with page after page of crafts, recipes, poems, jokes, tongue twisters, and experiments straight from Dr. Johnenstein’s Laboratory. Graphic novel-style tales add plenty of illustrated pages to the mix. This haunted book of horrors could only come from the Bathroom Readers Institute, and it’s “For Kids Only.” ENTER IF YOU DARE! You’ll find terrifying tales, including… - Revenge of the Meatloaf - The Legend of Peepee Hollow - The Creature from the Black Lagoon and the No Good, Very Bad Day - The Haunted Outhouse Frightening facts about… - The Curse of Amen-Ra - The Attack of the Cow Lady - Decay-causing Tooth Worms - The FBI’s Body Farm Horrifying things to do like… - Make a Bouncing Eyeball - Prank Your Friends with Caramel Onions - Craft a Barbie Zombie Hat - Serve Bloody Band-Aid Treats (Gag!)
This 34th annual edition of Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader offers an all-new collection of fascinating trivia, strange-but-true oddities, and the ever-popular stories of dumb crooks! Uncle John’s Hindsight Is 2020 Bathroom Reader is packed with tons of new articles from the worlds of pop culture, history, and science to help you get everything out of your system the next time you visit the throne room! Articles range in length from a single page to extended page-turners, each as entertaining as the last. From iconic television roles that almost weren’t to the origins of comic books, this 34th edition of fascinating trivia, hilarious lists, and notable quotes compiled by Uncle John and his team at the Bathroom Readers’ Institute will set your mind free to roam the world—and you won’t even need to leave the house!
Get ready to walk on the wild side! Once upon a time, Uncle John set his ghouls on a task to create three new For Kids Only! books: Strange & Scary, Wild & Woolly, and Under the Slimy Sea. But then a giant green creature oozed out of the muck and gobbled them all up! And what did that horrible thing spit out? This book--Creature Feature! It’s bubbling over with more than 400 pages of blood-curdling facts, gut-wrenching activities, cringe-inducing jokes, and head-spinning true stories--all made even more icky by all the freaky photographs and illustrations. Whether it walks, limps, gallops, flies, crawls, swims, or just sits there and makes fart noises--chances are you’ll encounter it in Creature Feature. So have a spooky good time checking out . . . * The World's Smelliest Sneaker * Dog-sized horses and horse-sized dogs * The great ball of snot * An armadillo invasion and a turtle traffic jam * Zombies, Bigfoot, and “the mothman” * How to make your own mummy * Why polar bears don't eat penguins * Vengeful ghosts and haunted castles * And much more! Don't say we didn't warn you.
It’s an actual fact—Uncle John is the most entertaining thing in the bathroom! Uncle John and his team of devoted researchers are back again with an all-new collection of weird news stories, odd historical events, dubious “scientific” theories, jaw-dropping lists, and more. This entertaining 31st anniversary edition contains 512 pages of all-new articles that will appeal to readers everywhere. Pop culture, history, dumb crooks, and other actual and factual tidbits are packed onto every page of this book. Inside, you’ll find . . . Dogs and cats who ran for political office The bizarre method people in Victorian England used to resuscitate drowning victims The man who met his future pet—a stray dog—while running across the Gobi Desert Searching for Planet X—the last unknown planet in our solar system Twantrums—strange Twitter rants that had disastrous effects The true story of Boaty McBoatface And much more!
From the USA TODAY bestselling author of Sweet Thing and Nowhere But Here comes a love story about a Craigslist “missed connection” post that gives two people a second chance at love fifteen years after they were separated in New York City. To the Green-eyed Lovebird: We met fifteen years ago, almost to the day, when I moved my stuff into the NYU dorm room next to yours at Senior House. You called us fast friends. I like to think it was more. We lived on nothing but the excitement of finding ourselves through music (you were obsessed with Jeff Buckley), photography (I couldn’t stop taking pictures of you), hanging out in Washington Square Park, and all the weird things we did to make money. I learned more about myself that year than any other. Yet, somehow, it all fell apart. We lost touch the summer after graduation when I went to South America to work for National Geographic. When I came back, you were gone. A part of me still wonders if I pushed you too hard after the wedding… I didn’t see you again until a month ago. It was a Wednesday. You were rocking back on your heels, balancing on that thick yellow line that runs along the subway platform, waiting for the F train. I didn’t know it was you until it was too late, and then you were gone. Again. You said my name; I saw it on your lips. I tried to will the train to stop, just so I could say hello. After seeing you, all of the youthful feelings and memories came flooding back to me, and now I’ve spent the better part of a month wondering what your life is like. I might be totally out of my mind, but would you like to get a drink with me and catch up on the last decade and a half? M
An exuberant infant is lifted high in the air by Mommy, kissed on the tummy by Daddy, and snuggled by a puppy.
In this deeply moving and life-affirming tale, a mother must nurture her five-year-old son through an unfathomable situation with only the power of their imagination and their boundless capacity to love. Written for the stage by Academy Award® nominee Emma Donoghue, this unique theatrical adaptation featuring songs and music by Kathryn Joseph and director Cora Bissett takes audiences on a richly emotional journey told through ingenious stagecraft, powerhouse performances, and heart-stopping storytelling. Room reaffirms our belief in humanity and the astounding resilience of the human spirit. This updated and revised edition was published to coincide with the Broadway premiere in Spring 2023.
A compassionate, shame-free guide for your darkest days “A one-of-a-kind book . . . to read for yourself or give to a struggling friend or loved one without the fear that depression and suicidal thoughts will be minimized, medicalized or over-spiritualized.”—Kay Warren, cofounder of Saddleback Church What happens when loving Jesus doesn’t cure you of depression, anxiety, or suicidal thoughts? You might be crushed by shame over your mental illness, only to be told by well-meaning Christians to “choose joy” and “pray more.” So you beg God to take away the pain, but nothing eases the ache inside. As darkness lingers and color drains from your world, you’re left wondering if God has abandoned you. You just want a way out. But there’s hope. In I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die, Sarah J. Robinson offers a healthy, practical, and shame-free guide for Christians struggling with mental illness. With unflinching honesty, Sarah shares her story of battling depression and fighting to stay alive despite toxic theology that made her afraid to seek help outside the church. Pairing her own story with scriptural insights, mental health research, and simple practices, Sarah helps you reconnect with the God who is present in our deepest anguish and discover that you are worth everything it takes to get better. Beautifully written and full of hard-won wisdom, I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die offers a path toward a rich, hope-filled life in Christ, even when healing doesn’t look like what you expect.
Engrossing historical fiction for readers of Bride of New France and The Birth House about one of Canada’s most inimitable pioneers and her struggles to survive in the wilderness, brought beautifully to life in this accomplished debut Teetering on the edge of genteel poverty, Englishwoman Susanna Moodie agrees to leave behind her growing career as a writer to follow her husband from her beloved Suffolk to the backwoods of Canada. John Moodie is an ebullient man with a weakness for money-making schemes, and he is convinced that riches await them in the New World. It is the 1830s, and despite their dreams, Susanna is woefully unprepared for life in the wilderness. Susanna Moodie’s true story of hardship and survival in a log cabin deep in the bush is part of our national mythology. Now, respected writer and editor Cecily Ross gives us an unprecedented fictional portrait of Susanna—the sister, the wife, the mother, the writer—a woman confronting both the wilds of Canada and the wilderness of her own heart. Told through imagined lost diaries, the novel explores Susanna’s complex inner life from childhood through to the worst challenges of pioneering in a harsh and unforgiving landscape with her devoted but hapless and often absent spouse. Part love story, part coming-of-age narrative, this captivating novel brings to vivid life Moodie’s courage, wit and strength, as well as her moments of despair. The Lost Diaries of Susanna Moodie shows how one woman, against all odds and adversity, prevails and makes this savage and beautiful land her own.