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A gloriously cringey collection of punny wordplay from the author of The Ultimate Book of Dad Jokes! • The pliers said to the wrench, “Get a grip. You're losing it!” • The marionette’s cardiologist warned him to change his lifestyle because he was too high-strung. • When the President’s family picnic was hit by a cold hard rain, the band struck up “Hail to The Chief.” • Q: How do vampires like their stakes? A: Rare. • Do dealers in Las Vegas casinos walk with a shuffle? • The young ear of corn was considered a rising star in the Marine Corps; he quickly rose to the rank of kernel. Make every day funny punny with this massive book of over 1,400 puns, arranged by category. Word nerds, class clowns, and dads everywhere never have to miss an opportunity to deliver a groan-inducing yet hilarious one-liner.
Jokes 101 is a new and different view of the best jokes and interesting observations on 107 separate topics from accountants to zombies. If you are looking for funny, clean jokes on a specific topic, just select the jokes that best suit your purpose. If you are required to say a few words or give a speech, a well-chosen joke or observation will put your audience in a more receptive mood and make your appearance unforgettable and unique. If you’re talking to a group of barbers, try, “I received an expensive comb as a gift. I thanked my girlfriend and said, ‘I’ll never part with it.’” When speaking to a group of doctors, what can you say? Knowing the current zombie craze, try, “When he told the ladies that he was Doctor Jekyll, they all wanted to Hyde.” When speaking about family, try, “Here’s a statement that breaks a mother’s heart: ‘Mommy, I missed the school bus.’” If singing is a topic, try, “My daughter sang a duet with our dog; it was a howling success.” That’s enough punishment for now. Will you be a hit, the proverbial life of the party, based on your singularly entertaining and informative discussions or speeches using the jokes or observations stolen from this, in all modesty, semibombastic, fantastic material in Jokes 101? PS: I don’t know anyone who can do me a bit of good, so no important person has endorsed this book; you’ll just have to think positive.
Dad jokes. They make you cringe, they make you groan but the one thing they have in common is they come from dad. Be it during a wedding toast or when introducing your dad to someone you want to impress, dad never fails to insert a dad joke wherever he can. This dad joke book makes a great gift for the dad who has everything and has heard everything. Or maybe you want to buy it for yourself and come prepared the next time dad wants to have a joke off. In any event, 101 So Bad, They're Good Dad Jokes will have your eyes rolling into the back of your head faster than dad can strip to his tighty-whities on a hot summer day!
This top-selling collection of pure fun (more than 295,000 copies sold) is back with a fresh and lively new cover to reach more readers eager to laugh. Puns, one-liners, jester-worthy jokes, and quirky quips will amaze and astound friends and family. Giggles are guaranteed as readers enjoy the crazy conversations and hilarious observations— “Daddy, the teacher was reading the Bible to us—all about the children of Israel building the temple, the children of Israel crossing the Red Sea, the children of Israel making sacrifices. Didn’t the grownups do anything?” “You’re the laziest fellow I have seen. Don’t you do anything quickly?” “Yes, I get tired fast.” “I haven’t slept for days.” “How come?” “I only sleep at night!”
Did you know that the dog who played Toto in The Wizard of Oz earned more money for the film than any of the munchkins did? Or that Jack Nicholson was considered for the role of Hannibal Lecter in Silence of the Lambs? If you enjoy going to the movies, you will love this book which contains over one hundred amazing facts about your favourite flicks. Organised into sections such as cameos, money, props and more, this is the perfect addition for any film fan's bookshelf.
Move over, Benedict Arnold . . . Oh to be sure, America's first traitor is one of the 101 bastards you will find in this one-of-a-kind account of bad guys in Washington. But compared to some of the gross misconduct in this frighteningly funny history book, well, let's just say he's in good company. This page-turner of a potboiler reveals all the dirtiest little secrets readers never learned in history class. From illegitimate children (we thought Grover Cleveland was too boring to have sex) and illicit trysts (Warren G. Harding in the White House phone booth with his secretary) to turncoats (make up your own mind about Daniel Ellsberg) and traitors (General Wilkinson, aka a Spanish secret agent), you will discover all the dirt worth dishing since the founding of Jamestown. The Book of Bastards - because what you don't know about the history of our great nation can make you laugh and cry!
The Second World War ended over seventy-five years ago and yet it holds a lasting fascination for millions. Most school children worldwide have studied it but it is unlikely that they would have learned any of the fascinating facts to be found in The Ultimate World War Two Trivia Book. Funny, heart-breaking and downright borderline unbelievable, the snippets in this book are perfect for dropping into conversations to amaze and amuse your friends. You might also find yourself becoming the king or queen of the pub trivia quiz when you have knowledge of Winkie the Pigeon, the Battle of the Tennis Court and the Bee Bombs of Prester John. One thing to be careful of - never, ever lend this book to anyone; it is totally addictive and you will never see it again! Many books of trivia push the envelope and the facts inside can't be trusted. This is not something to worry about with The Ultimate World War Two Trivia Book because it comes from the pens of Richard Denham (Robin Hood: English Outlaw and Arthur: Shadow of a God) and M. J. Trow (The Black Book and Enemies of the State). Just because a fact sounds unlikely doesn't mean it isn't true and you can amaze your friends and colleagues as well as clean up at the Dog and Duck by memorizing absolutely any of these facts, presented in short snippets for either devouring all at once or for browsing in the loo. Complete with a whistle-stop tour of the causes, course and consequences of the war by M. J. Trow who, to quote a recent reviewer could 'make a shopping list interesting', this book is a quick way to learn more than you ever thought there was to know about the weird and wonderful side of World War Two.
Analyses the performance of two key parties engaged in fighting during World War II.
A classic work of American literature that has not stopped changing minds and lives since it burst onto the literary scene, The Things They Carried is a ground-breaking meditation on war, memory, imagination, and the redemptive power of storytelling. The Things They Carried depicts the men of Alpha Company: Jimmy Cross, Henry Dobbins, Rat Kiley, Mitchell Sanders, Norman Bowker, Kiowa, and the character Tim O’Brien, who has survived his tour in Vietnam to become a father and writer at the age of forty-three. Taught everywhere—from high school classrooms to graduate seminars in creative writing—it has become required reading for any American and continues to challenge readers in their perceptions of fact and fiction, war and peace, courage and fear and longing. The Things They Carried won France's prestigious Prix du Meilleur Livre Etranger and the Chicago Tribune Heartland Prize; it was also a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize and the National Book Critics Circle Award.