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"Fresh and useful . . . excellent practical advice . . . thorough and lucid . . . will be welcomed by many who have struggled to ask forgiveness and to forgive." -Publishers Weekly A finalist in the Books for a Better Life Awards competition! Discover the healing power of apology and put its magic to work in your life Do you have a difficult time apologizing or are you involved with someone who does? Do you tend to overapologize and appear weak in others' eyes? Do you want to reconcile with someone but feel they owe you an apology first? Do you need to apologize or make amends to someone but don't know how to go about it? In this inspiring book from internationally acclaimed therapist and self-improvement author Beverly Engel, you will learn why some people have difficulty apologizing while others tend to overapologize. You'll learn how to give a meaningful apology, how to ask for one, and how to receive one. From making amends with those you have hurt to dealing with someone who refuses to apologize to teaching children responsibility and empathy, this life-changing book shows you how to bring a healing new element of renewal into every relationship in your life. "Beverly Engel has eloquently explained the power of apology in a remarkably insightful and perceptive manner. No one has been better able to explain what an apology means and its role in reconciliation." -Rabbi Charles A. Klein, author of How to Forgive When You Can't Forget: Healing Our Personal Relationships "Readers of this wise and lucid guide to the neglected art of authentic apology will acquire a powerful tool to help repair relationships with others and with themselves." -Jeanne Safer, Ph.D., author of Forgiving and Not Forgiving: A New Approach to Resolving Intimate Betrayal "An engaging and in-depth book on a subject that has rarely been addressed so intelligently and thoroughly. Ms. Engel offers the reader specific suggestions that can help you improve all your relationships." -Steven Farmer, M.F.T., author of Adult Children of Abusive Parents
This book offers guidance and inspiration on how and when to say "I'm sorry." It will increase your awareness of the power and impact a sincere apology can make. The author has included examples of interpersonal, national, and international situations when an apology was or should have been extended to effect positive change.
Based on the New York Times bestseller The Body Is Not an Apology, this is an action guide to help readers practice the art of radical self-love both for themselves and to transform our society. Readers of The Body Is Not an Apology have been clamoring for guidance on how to do the work of radical self-love. After crowdsourcing her community, Sonya Renee Taylor found her readers wanted more concrete ideas on how to apply this work in their everyday lives. Your Body Is Not an Apology Workbook is the action guide that gives them tools and structured frameworks they can begin using immediately to deepen their radical self-love journey—such as Taylor's four pillars of practice, which help readers dismantle body shame and give them access to a lifestyle rooted in love. Taylor guides readers to move beyond theory and into doing and being radical self-love change agents in the world. “In this book, you will be asked to draw, color, doodle, talk to friends, take risks, and perhaps step outside of what feels like your natural gifts and talents,” Taylor writes. “I encourage you to release the need to be ‘good' at what you are doing and instead strive to be authentic. Perfection is the enemy of radical self-love because it is an impossible illusion. When the voice of perfectionism chimes in, take a deep breath, remember that the work is about the process, not about the product, and give yourself permission to be fabulously unapologetically imperfect.”
One doctor speaking to other doctors and health care providers about how to provide the best possible care for patients--by actually caring about patients. These powerful laminated cards helps health care providers understand and practice what to do after unexpected outcomes--to apologize. Michael Woods walks health care providers through the Five "R's" of Apology: Recognition; Regret; Responsibility; Remedy and Remain Engaged.
One of the most profound interactions that can occur between people, apologies have the power to heal humiliations, free the mind from deep-seated guilt, remove the desire for vengeance, and ultimately restore broken relationships. With On Apology, Aaron Lazare offers an eye-opening analysis of this vital interaction, illuminating an often hidden corner of the human heart. He discusses the importance of shame, guilt, and humiliation, the initial reluctance to apologize, the simplicity of the act of apologizing, the spontaneous generosity and forgiveness on the part of the offended, the transfer of power and respect between two parties, and much more. Readers will not only find a wealth of insight that they can apply to their own lives, but also a deeper understanding of national and international conflicts and how we might resolve them. The act of apologizing is quite simply immensely fulfilling. On Apology opens a window onto this common occurrence to reveal the feelings and actions at the heart of this profound interaction.
From the bestselling author of The Vagina Monologues-a powerful, life-changing examination of abuse and atonement. “A triumph of artistry and empathy.” -Naomi Klein “A crucial step forward . . . This is an urgently needed book right now.” -Jane Fonda “Courageous, transformative, and yes-healing.” -Anne Lamott Like millions of women, Eve Ensler has been waiting much of her lifetime for an apology. Sexually and physically abused by her father, Eve has struggled her whole life from this betrayal, longing for an honest reckoning from a man who is long dead. After years of work as an anti-violence activist, she decided she would wait no longer; an apology could be imagined, by her, for her, to her. The Apology, written by Eve from her father's point of view in the words she longed to hear, attempts to transform the abuse she suffered with unflinching truthfulness, compassion, and an expansive vision for the future. Through The Apology Eve has set out to provide a new way for herself and a possible road for others, so that survivors of abuse may finally envision how to be free. She grapples with questions she has sought answers to since she first realized the impact of her father's abuse on her life: How do we offer a doorway rather than a locked cell? How do we move from humiliation to revelation, from curtailing behavior to changing it, from condemning perpetrators to calling them to reckoning? What will it take for abusers to genuinely apologize? Remarkable and original, The Apology is an acutely transformational look at how, from the wounds of sexual abuse, we can begin to re-emerge and heal. It is revolutionary, asking everything of each of us: courage, honesty, and forgiveness.
The Body Is Not an Apology The Power of Radical Self-Love Against a global backdrop of war, social upheaval, and personal despair, there is a growing sense of urgency to challenge the systems of oppression that dehumanize bodies and strip us of our shared humanity. Rather than feel helpless in the face of oppression, world-renowned activist, performance poet, and author Sonya Renee Taylor teaches us how to turn to the power of radical self-love in her new book, The Body Is Not an Apology. Radical self-love is the guiding framework that transforms the learned self-hatred of our bodies and the prejudices we have about other people's bodies into a vision of compassion, equity, and justice. In a revolutionary departure from the corporate self-help and body-positivity movement, Taylor forges the inextricable bond between radical self-love and social justice. The first step is recognizing that we have all been indoctrinated into a system of body shame that profits off of our self-hatred. When we ask ourselves, "Who benefits from our collective shame?" we can begin to make the distinction between the messages we are receiving about our bodies or other bodies and the truth. This book moves us beyond our all-too-often hidden lives, where we are easily encouraged to forget that we are whole humans having whole human experiences in our bodies alongside others. Radical self-love encourages us to embark on a personal journey of transformation with thoughtful reflection on the origins of our minds and bodies as a source of strength. In doing this, we not only learn to reject negative messages about ourselves but begin to thwart the very power structures that uphold them. Systems of oppression thrive off of our inability to make peace with bodies and difference. Radical self-love not only dismantles shame and self-loathing in us but has the power to dismantle global systems of injustice-because when we make peace with our bodies, only then do we have the capacity to truly make peace with the bodies of others
There’s nothing easy about apology. The news is filled with examples of leaders apologizing, needing to apologize, or failing miserably at the attempt. And certainly we all have occasion to apologize ourselves—maybe more often than we realize. But we don’t need more apologies, says John Kador—we need better ones. Too many people just go through the motions, missing out on the power of apology to restore strained relationships, create possibilities for growth, and generate better outcomes for all. Effective Apology challenges you to think about the fundamental value and importance of apology as it delivers detailed advice for making an apology that truly heals and renews. Kador explores the Five Rs of apology: Recognize the wrong and the person harmed; accept moral Responsibility for your actions; express Remorse; provide meaningful Restitution; and offer assurance that the offense will not be Repeated. Making apology work in the real world—when and how to apologize, in what medium, and how to make it stick—is made clear through over seventy examples of good and bad apologies drawn from the news, popular culture, and the experiences of Kador, his clients, and his friends. The willingness to apologize signals strength, character, and integrity. Effective leadership is impossible without effective apology. John Kador shows how to craft and deliver a confident apology that will defuse resentment, reduce litigation, create goodwill, and transform a relationship ruptured by mistrust and disappointment into something stronger and more durable than it ever was before.
Renowned psychologist and bestselling author of The Dance of Anger sheds new light on the two most important words in the English language, "I'm sorry," and offers a unique perspective on the challenge of healing broken relationships and restoring trust. Dr. Harriet Lerner has been studying apologies for more than two decades, namely, why some people won't give them. Now she offers compelling stories and solid theory that demonstrates the transformative power of making amends and what is required for healing when the damage we've inflicted (or received) is far from simple. Readers will learn how to craft a meaningful apology and avoid signals of insincerity that only deepen suffering. In Why Won't You Apologize? Lerner challenges the popular notion that forgiveness is the only path to peace of mind and helps those who have been injured to resist pressure to forgive too easily. She explains what drives both the non-apologizer and the over-apologizer, and why the people who do the worst things are the least able to own their misdeeds. With her trademark humour and wit, Lerner offers a joyful and sanity-saving guide to setting things right.
Through its four essential steps, A GOOD APOLOGY gives groundbreaking advice on how best to make an effective apology toward rebuilding any relationship, for readers of The Body Keeps the Score. We've all done something wrong or made a mistake or insulted someone -- even if by accident. We've all been hurt and wanted the other person to help us heal. It may be surprising, but the breaches themselves aren't the real problem; our inability to fix them is what causes us trouble. In A Good Apology, Dr. Molly Howes uses her experiences with patients in her practice, research findings, and news stories to illustrate the power and importance of a thorough apology. She teaches how we can all learn to craft an effective apology with four straightforward steps. An apology is a small-scale event between people, but it's enormously powerful. This comprehensive book gives readers the tools to fix their relationships, make amends, and move forward. With it, you'll fully understand the meaning and importance of this universal and timeless endeavor: a good apology.