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Includes step-by-step instructions and illustrations which show how to create dolls, family keepsakes, holiday gifts, stuffed animals, and bazaar gifts -- all from old pantyhose.
Learn how to make practical items for both personal or gift use from panty hose.
Learn how to make practical items for both personal or gift use from panty hose.
The New York Times bestselling craft guide that inspired the hit new TV show, At Home With Amy Sedaris It's often been said that ugly people craft and attractive people have sex. In Simple Times, Amy Sedaris sets the record straight and delivers a book that will forever change the world of crafting. Demonstrating that crafting is one of life's more pleasurable and constructive leisure activities, Sedaris shows that anyone with a couple of hours to kill and access to pipe cleaners can join the elite society of crafters. You will discover how to make popular crafts such as Pompom Ringworms and Seashell Toilet Seat Covers, all while avoiding the most common crafting accidents (sawdust fires, feather asphyxia, pine cone lodged in throat). You will cook your own edible crafts, from a Crafty Candle Salad to Sugar Skulls, with many more recipes and craft ideas that will inspire you to create your very own hastily constructed obscure d'arts. Praise for Simple Times "Amy Sedaris is a kookier, kitschier version of Martha Stewart...Simple Times is an ideal gift for the crafter who has crafted everything." - Associated Press "A wildly cheeky guide." -- InStyle "For anyone who's ever collected hats crocheted together...or simply for fans of Amy Sedaris and her idiosyncratic sense of humor." -- New York Times Book Review
Wrinkles, Waistlines, and Wet Pants is an irreverent look at aging. Fashion, self -improvement and social etiquette are thrown out the window in this hilarious book that disregards good taste and dignity. The author disproves the theory that fifty is the new thirty with anecdotes, some of them actually true. Existence after fifty, according to Jeanne Kraus, is fraught with peril from lifethreatening underwear to homeowners' associations. Lifestyle activities are recommended, along with full schedules of doctor visits. Humiliation lurks at every corner with shotgun makeup interventions, bodily function failures, and swiss cheese memory. Condom trees, risque photos found in a laundry mound, and DNA-tainted ornaments all have their part in this series of incidents. Jeanne includes advice for those aging ne'er do-wells who hope to make it to the pearly gates eventually. And even though this book will not change you in any way, there is something for everyone in Wrinkles, Waistlines, and Wet Pants. Even self-help junkies will be delighted with the three insightful but useless surveys. Wrinkles, Waistbands, and Wet Pants was wittily written by Jeanne Kraus, and illustrated by her sister, Diana Arneson, both having experienced wrinkles, expanding waistlines, and wet pants."
A Thanksgiving story featuring a large turkey with a big problem... ...he's been invited to EVERYONE'S home for dinner!With five homes to visit -- Horse's, Pig's, Sheep and Goat's, Cow's, and Mouse's --Turkey knows there'll be a ton of food to eat. But there'll also be friends and their families who can't wait to celebrate the holiday with Turkey! Can this very plump bird make it through every meal without bursting? A silly, read-aloud story featuring food, friends, and one hilarious turkey!