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A hilarious book from bestselling author and stand-up comic James Campbell, who has visited over 3,000 primary schools to tell stories and encourage children to write their own. Uncover the sidesplitting life of cucumber scaredy-cats, non-stop pooping hamsters, exploding fish and everything in-between (and some things that have nothing to do with pets but are still ridiculously funny). This hilarious book answers all the big questions, like: do sausage dogs eat sausages? Why has my cat done a poo behind my wardrobe? And how can I persuade my parents to get me a pet? For real-life pet facts, imaginary stories, and a generally laugh-so-hard-snot-comes-out-your-nose read, this is the only pet book you'll ever need! Written by the outstanding children's comedian James Campbell, prepare yourself for The Funny Life of Pets! But be WARNED – this IS NOT a normal book...You read a normal book by starting on page one and reading to the end (BORING). You can read this book forwards, backwards, sideways, and in approximately 861,000 different ways in-between. This is a book with outrageous facts, hilarious jokes, insanely funny online videos and brilliant stories all about pets, the author, and all sorts of other things. WARNING: Anything you think you might have learned from this book might not be very accurate so should not be used in a school project or as part of homework. Unless of course, you are made of stardust and are as brave as sunshine.
A hilarious book from bestselling author and stand-up comic James Campbell, who has visited over 3,000 primary schools to tell stories and encourage children to write their own. Uncover the ridiculously funny life of teachers (and some things that have nothing to do with teachers but are still splendidly funny) according to James Campbell, comedian extraordinaire. Ever wondered what teachers do when they're not in the classroom? Are they undercover detectives, champion roller-blade dancers or do they spend their evenings playing with their 576 cats? This face-achingly funny book will also teach you why you should carry an emergency banana with you at all times, how to fart in class silently without anyone knowing it was you and how to catapult yourself to school by building a medieval style catapult in your back garden! Whether you love or loathe your teachers, want to become one when you grow up or don't give two figs about your teacher but simply love a HILARIOUS read, this book is for you. Prepare to roll around the floor laughing with the snot-inducingly brilliant The Funny Life of Teachers. But be warned – this is NOT a normal book. You can read it forwards, backwards, sideways and in approximately 861,000 different ways in between. Whichever way you read it, look no further for fantastic real-life teacher facts, incredibly funny illustrations, imaginary stories and an impossibly silly read!
An all-new set of hilarious one-page animal antics perfect for pet-lovers - starring the furry friends of Illumination's The Secret Life Of Pets and The Secret Life Of Pets 2! Sidesplitting comic strips from Stephane Lapuss', writer of the official Minions comics!
An inspiring and moving memoir of the author's turbulent life with 600 rescue animals. Laurie Zaleski never aspired to run an animal rescue; that was her mother Annie’s dream. But from girlhood, Laurie was determined to make the dream come true. Thirty years later as a successful businesswoman, she did it, buying a 15-acre farm deep in the Pinelands of South Jersey. She was planning to relocate Annie and her caravan of ragtag rescues—horses and goats, dogs and cats, chickens and pigs—when Annie died, just two weeks before moving day. In her heartbreak, Laurie resolved to make her mother's dream her own. In 2001, she established the Funny Farm Animal Rescue outside Mays Landing, New Jersey. Today, she carries on Annie’s mission to save abused and neglected animals. Funny Farm is Laurie’s story: of promises kept, dreams fulfilled, and animals lost and found. It’s the story of Annie McNulty, who fled a nightmarish marriage with few skills, no money and no resources, dragging three kids behind her, and accumulating hundreds of cast-off animals on the way. And lastly, it's the story of the brave, incredible, and adorable animals that were rescued. Although there are some sad parts (as life always is), there are lots of laughs.
A moving memoir from an award-winning author A mother cat and her kittens, shot with a pellet gun. A poacher illegally stalking a bear. Peg Kehret tells these true stories and more as she invites readers into her life on a small wildlife sanctuary. Vividly showing the joys of animal rescue while providing facts about the animals and birds she encounters, Kehret also shares the tragedy of her husband's sudden death, and the pain of losing Pete, the shelter cat who co-authored three of her books. Written with honesty, heart, and humor, Animals Welcome is a personal glimpse into the life of an author who loves animals, and the philosophy by which she lives.
Pets, hilarity, and plots for world domination come together in Pets Rule!, an early chapter book series perfect for fans of The Secret Life of Pets! Pick a book. Grow a Reader! This series is part of Scholastic's early chapter book line, Branches, aimed at newly independent readers. With easy-to-read text, high-interest content, fast-paced plots, and illustrations on every page, these books will boost reading confidence and stamina. Branches books help readers grow! Meet Ember, a rescue Chihuahua who has just been adopted by the Chin family. Ember is no ordinary dog: he thinks he is an evil overlord, destined to rule the world. He enlists the help of the other pets in the house, like Smelly Steve the hamster and Neo the canary, to take over the neighborhood. Their first mission is defeating Masher, the mean squirrel who lives next door. But to his shock, Ember finds himself growing attached to his “minions”, the Chin family—especially Lucy. Does Ember still have what it takes to control of the neighborhood... and the world? With laugh-out-loud humor, engaging artwork on every page, and nonstop action that will have readers rushing to turn the pages, Pets Rule is the just-right series for any emerging reader! "This early chapter book expertly cultivates a larger-than-life pseudo-antihero... an infectiously silly series starter." -- Kirkus Reviews
"At the pet show, there are so many different types of pets. With dogs and cats, horses and chickens, hamsters and chinchillas--and many, many more--this book celebrates animal companions of all shapes and sizes"--
The Secret Life of Pets: The Junior Novelization is a retelling of Illumination Entertainment and Universal Pictures’ The Secret Life of Pets, a comedy about the lives our pets lead after we leave for work or school each day. This ebook edition features full-color scenes from the movie, and is great for boys and girls 8 and up.
Ever since her parents died on her fifth birthday, Thomasina has been daydreaming that something amazing will happen in her life to make up for everything she's been through. After turning sixteen, Thomasina begins to accept that her life will remain unremarkable... but when she wakes up one morning to discover that her foster family has been turned into pet animals, her ordinary life will turn into an extraordinary adventure!
Gary Paulsen has owned dozens of unforgettable and amazing dogs, and here are his favorites--one to a chapter. Among them are Snowball, the puppy he owned as a boy in the Philippines; Ike, his mysterious hunting companion; Electric Fred and his best friend, Pig; Dirk, the grim protector; and Josh, one of the remarkable border collies working on Paulsen's ranch today. My Life in Dog Years is a book for every dog lover and every Paulsen fan--a perfect combination that shows vividly the joy and wisdom that come from growing up with man's best friend.