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From the creators of the bestselling parodies We're Going on a Bar Hunt, The Very Hungover Caterpillar and The Teenager Who Came to Tea. 'Tis the season to be jolly. But as any modern family knows, 'tis also the season to be micro-managed by your in-laws, guzzle too many sherries, fight over the TV remote, and panic about your internet shopping not arriving on time. But if you think that's bad, just wait until you meet the Jones family. Instead of this being their best Christmas ever, this might just be their last - especially if they don't all pull together to help their surprise guest in his hour of need. An uproariously funny update of the traditional Christmas Eve classic - that all the family can enjoy. Praise for The Very Hungover Caterpillar 'Hilarious and painfully accurate, The Very Hungover Caterpillar is liable to be one of those parodies that becomes more famous than the original' Independent Praise for We're Going on a Bar Hunt '. . . a parody that will draw a smile from any parent' Guardian Praise for The Teenager Who Came to Tea 'A hilarious parody of a much-loved children's book and a perfect read for anyone who remembers the original, or has ever been a teenager or is the parent / grandparent of a teenager today' gransnet.com
A poem about the visit that Santa Claus pays to the children of the world during the night before every Christmas.
Princess Morbucks switches Santa's lists of the naughty and the nice, and when the Powerpuff Girls discover they have received stockings full of coal--and Princess has all of their powers--it is up to Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup to set things right.
The Langfords and the Riders have been neighbors and close friends for years. Even their children have been playmates and pals. They completely understand and admire one another--that is, until one day when Mrs. Rider phones the Langford home to leave a message and Ranny (yes, he's the youngest) answers the call. He is engrossed at the time in a comic book so how could anyone expect him to relay Mrs. Rider's words correctly. He gets the message so garbled that everyone goes far afield and both families are embroiled in a real spat--and right before Christmas! Ranny finds himself in the middle of all turmoil, brings to light what actually caused the misunderstanding and tops everything by filling in at the last moment in the church pageant. What is his role? Brotherly Love!
Edwina, the Christmas tree fairy, has been in control of the Christmas tree ornaments for longer than most of them can remember. But this year, there’s a new fairy in town—the flamboyant Consuela—bought on a family holiday in Valencia. Chaos erupts on Christmas Eve as the fairies fight for position at the top of the tree. It looks as though Christmas will be ruined. It’s more important than ever this year, because for Beth and her mother, the tree is more than an ornament. It holds memories of happier times and of people they love. Can the ornaments learn to work together in time to make Beth’s wish to see her mother smile again come true?
It’s the night before Christmas and all through the house not a creature is stirring not even a mouse.... but when Christmas Tree wakes and declares himself the King of Christmas, peace and quiet go out the window and the Christmas Things fight over the true meaning of Christmas! From the author and illustrator of PONG! comes a delightful and fun tale about the spirit of Christmas.
A delightful Christmas storybook for adults based on the action-packed Die Hard movie All John McClane wants for Christmas is to reunite with his estranged family. But when his wife’s office holiday party turns into a deadly hostage situation, he has to save her life before he can get home in time for Christmas! The unconventional fan-favorite movie Die Hard is now an illustrated storybook—complete with machine guns, European terrorists, and a cop who’s forced to rely on all his cunning and skills (and the help of a fellow officer) to save the day. Based on the classic “Night Before Christmas” poem and filled with whimsical illustrations, this cleverly reimagined homage is destined to become a holiday classic. *Contains adult material including violence and strong language. Reader discretion is advised. Ho-ho-ho.
What if your struggles aren’t a barrier to thriving but an invitation into your most vibrant days? Discover how to live a life of joy and fullness, even in the midst of disappointment and broken dreams. How can you find a way forward when life throws you sucker punches, when you face obstacles that seem to snuff out your faith, when you lose someone precious to you? It is in the sacred space of pain and promise that we can begin to flourish. Even in the midst of disappointment and broken dreams it is possible to grow, be strong, and draw near to God. In The Fight to Flourish, Jennie Lusko draws on her experiences after the loss of her five-year-old daughter, Lenya, to show you that the ingredients for a fresh and thriving life are right in front of you. Jennie's story will help remind you of how much God loves you, even when life feels unbearable. With grit and grace, Jennie will help you: Discover that flourishing is not an impossible destination but a divine revelation of where you are right now Find relief from the weight of overwhelming circumstances by resting in the realization that God is fighting for you Trust that God is growing you in the gap between your expectations and your experience The word flourish is written all over you and your future. Discover the ongoing strength that Jennie has found and learn to reengage in life with renewed strength and confidence.
A version in Cajun dialect of the famous poem "The Night Before Christmas," set in a Louisiana bayou.
Published anonymously in 1823, "The Night Before Christmas" has traditionally been attributed to Clement Clarke Moore (1779-1863), who included it in his Poems (1844). But descendants of Henry Livingston (1748-1828) claim that he read it to his children as his own creation long before Moore is alleged to have composed it. This book evaluates the opposing arguments and for the first time uses the author-attribution techniques of modern computational stylistics to settle the long-standing dispute. Both writers left substantial bodies of verse, which have been computer analyzed for distinguishing characteristics. Employing a range of tests and introducing a new one--statistical analysis of phonemes--this study identifies the true author and makes a significant contribution to the growing field of attribution studies.