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Certified biblical counselor and long-term missionary Dr. Anne Dryburgh describes in biblical terms what secularists refer to as 'emotional abuse'. From her long experience she explains how an abusive parent relates to a child, and the impact on the child. Her book will assist you in discovering how you can live out the profound truth that in Christ you have everything, including everything for dealing with your childhood experiences. From the Foreword 'Emotional abuse is a term that can be easily misunderstood and as a result, misused....Anne Dryburgh is an excellent person to address this issue and help us see with the clarity of Scripture what emotional abuse is, how to perceive it, and how to respond to it in a healthy and God glorifying way. Combined with her command of Scripture, Scottish wit, and abundant experience helping people navigate these troubling circumstances, Anne provides us with a sympathetic, compassionate, and hope-giving resource to help people rightly understand and respond to their experiences of emotional abuse' - Dr Andrew Rogers. Anne has written a thoughtful, practical, and biblical book on a difficult topic. Her compassion for the sufferer is evident, and her use of the Scriptures brings comfort to the troubled heart. This book will be helpful to those who have suffered at the hands of an abusive parent and those who desire to help them - Julie Ganschow, PhD. Commendations Anne tackles a very difficult issue with compassion and skill. She helps us understand, through the lenses of Scripture, the lingering effects and current impact of parental mistreatment on adults. She offers biblical help and hope for those who believe that their past will keep them from living a fruitful life in the present - Lou Priolo, PhD. With years of counseling experience, Dr. Dryburgh is able to compassionately lay out potential sequelae of parental oppression in a concise and organized manner. Consistently she refers to Scripture and even more, to the true and living God of Scripture, for hope and healing - Jenn Chen, PsyD, MABC, MA (MFT) Anne Dryburgh has provided us with yet another helpful tool when dealing with abuse. In her book, The Emotionally Abusive Parent, she gives hope with clear steps for change and healing when children are verbally abused by one or both parents. As with all of Anne's books, she points to Christ as the sufficient one to heal and to give hope! She is quickly becoming the Christian voice for abuse victims. I wholeheartedly recommend all of her books - Johnny Touchet, Pastor and Biblical Counselor How this book can help you The aim of this book is to help you realize that if you have suffered parental emotional abuse, you can live in the truth that in Christ you have everything you need for life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3; Ephesians 1:3). In Christ you have everything, including everything for dealing with your childhood experiences. That sounds crazy when you think of the suffering you may have endured as you were growing up. It also sounds crazy when the lasting effects clearly impacted who you are, but this book will help you discover how you can live out this profound truth. We will learn what secularists refer to as emotional abuse, how to understand it biblically, what it looks like in how a parent relates to a child, and at the impact on the child. As we look at these effects, we will also look at what is true about being in Christ and how you can live on the basis of who you are in him. We will also meet Laura in several of the chapters, hear about what she suffered, and how she learned to see who she is in Christ and deal graciously with her parent. What this book is not Since this is a short book not every question concerning parental emotional abuse could possibly be addressed. It cannot cover every practical issue you may be facing, nor does it present all the Bible teaches on the subject since that would take a much longer book.
A history of a childhood abuse is not a life sentence. Here is hope, healing, and a chance to recover the self lost in childhood. Drawing on his extensive work with Adult Children, and on his own experience as a survivor of emotional neglect, therapist Steven Farmer demonstrates that through exercises and journal work, his program can help lead you through grieving your lost childhood, to become your own parent, and integrate the healing aspects of spiritual, physical, and emotional recovery into your adult life.
In this important book, Dr. Laura Schlessinger shows men and women that they can have a Good Life no matter how Bad their Childhood. For each of us, there is a connection between our early family dynamics and experiences and our current attitudes and decisions. Many of the people Dr. Laura has helped did not realize how their histories impacted their adult lives, or how their choices in people, repetitive situations, and decisions -- even their emotional reactions -- were connected to those early negative experiences, playing a major role in their current unhappiness. For these people and millions like them, too much time is dedicated to repeating the ugly dynamics of childhood in a vain attempt to repair or cope with deep hurt and longings. Too often they use their emotional pain to control others or excuse their own inappropriate and destructive behaviors. Some turn to therapy, only to find themselves trapped in their self-pitying victim mode, robbed of optimism, confidence, and growth. Dr. Laura will help you realize that no matter what circumstances you came from or currently live in, you are ultimately responsible for how you react to them. The acceptance of this basic truth is the source of your power to secure the Good Life you long for. In her signature straightforward style, with real-life examples, Dr. Laura shows you what you will gain by not being satisfied with an identity as a victim, or even as a survivor -- but striving to be a victor! In Bad Childhood -- Good Life, Dr. Laura will guide you to accept the truth of the assaults on your psyche and soul, understand your unique coping style and how it impacts your daily thoughts and actions, and help you embrace a life of more peace and happiness. Bad Childhood -- Good Life comes from a compassionate and personal place. Dr. Laura also reveals some of her own experiences with a difficult childhood and what efforts it took to attain a Good Life. She writes, "My resilience has paid off, and I'm doing the best I can with what I've got." Now you can, too.
How to recognize and cope with Parent Frustration Syndrome (PFS): negative thoughts and feelings about your children"
Now a New York Times bestseller! If you grew up with an emotionally immature, unavailable, or selfish parent, you may have lingering feelings of anger, loneliness, betrayal, or abandonment. You may recall your childhood as a time when your emotional needs were not met, when your feelings were dismissed, or when you took on adult levels of responsibility in an effort to compensate for your parent’s behavior. These wounds can be healed, and you can move forward in your life. In this breakthrough book, clinical psychologist Lindsay Gibson exposes the destructive nature of parents who are emotionally immature or unavailable. You will see how these parents create a sense of neglect, and discover ways to heal from the pain and confusion caused by your childhood. By freeing yourself from your parents’ emotional immaturity, you can recover your true nature, control how you react to them, and avoid disappointment. Finally, you’ll learn how to create positive, new relationships so you can build a better life. Discover the four types of difficult parents: The emotional parent instills feelings of instability and anxiety The driven parent stays busy trying to perfect everything and everyone The passive parent avoids dealing with anything upsetting The rejecting parent is withdrawn, dismissive, and derogatory
The groundbreaking guide to self-healing and getting the love you missed “Years ago, I was on vacation and read The Emotionally Absent Mother. That book was one of many that woke me up. . . . I began the process of reparenting and it’s changed my life.”—Dr. Nicole LePera, New York Times–bestselling author of How to Do the Work Was your mother preoccupied, distant, or even demeaning? Have you struggled with relationships—or with your own self-worth? Often, the grown children of emotionally absent mothers can’t quite put a finger on what’s missing from their lives. The children of abusive mothers, by contrast, may recognize the abuse—but overlook its lasting, harmful effects. Psychotherapist Jasmin Lee Cori has helped thousands of men and women heal the hidden wounds left by every kind of undermothering. In this second edition of her pioneering book, with compassion for mother and child alike, she explains: Possible reasons your mother was distracted or hurtful—and what she was unable to give The lasting impact of childhood emotional neglect and abuse How to find the child inside you and fill the “mother gap” through reflections and exercises How to secure a happier future for yourself (and perhaps for your children).
Leslie Vernick, counselor and social worker, has witnessed the devastating effects of emotional abuse. Many, including many in the church, have not addressed this form of destruction in families and relationships because it is difficult to talk about. With godly guidance and practical experience, Vernick offers an empathetic approach to recognizing an emotionally destructive relationship and addresses the symptoms and the damage with biblical tools. Readers will understand how to: Reveal behaviors that are meant to control, punish, and hurt Confront and speak truth when the timing is right Determine when to keep trying, when to get out Get safe and stay safe Build an identity in Christ This practical and thorough resource will help countless individuals, families, and churches view abuse from God's perspective and understand how vital it is for victims to embrace His freedom from the physical, emotional, spiritual, and generational effects of emotionally destructive relationships.
Clinical psychologist and author of The Defining Decade, Meg Jay takes us into the world of the supernormal: those who soar to unexpected heights after childhood adversity. Whether it is the loss of a parent to death or divorce; bullying; alcoholism or drug abuse in the home; mental illness in a parent or a sibling; neglect; emotional, physical or sexual abuse; having a parent in jail; or growing up alongside domestic violence, nearly 75% of us experience adversity by the age of 20. But these experiences are often kept secret, as are our courageous battles to overcome them. Drawing on nearly two decades of work with clients and students, Jay tells the tale of ordinary people made extraordinary by these all-too-common experiences, everyday superheroes who have made a life out of dodging bullets and leaping over obstacles, even as they hide in plain sight as doctors, artists, entrepreneurs, lawyers, parents, activists, teachers, students and readers. She gives a voice to the supernormals among us as they reveal not only "How do they do it?" but also "How does it feel?" These powerful stories, and those of public figures from Andre Agassi to Jay Z, will show supernormals they are not alone but are, in fact, in good company. Marvelously researched and compassionately written, this exceptional book narrates the continuing saga that is resilience as it challenges us to consider whether -- and how -- the good wins out in the end.
BONUS: This edition contains an excerpt from Dr. Susan Forward's Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them. When you were a child... Did your parents tell you were bad or worthless? Did your parents use physical pain to discipline you? Did you have to take care of your parents because of their problems? Were you frightened of your parents? Did your parents do anything to you that had to be kept secret? Now that you are an adult... Do your parents still treat you as if you were a child? Do you have intense emotional or physical reactions after spending time with your parents? Do your parents control you with threats or guilt? Do they manipulate you with money? Do you feel that no matter what you do, it's never good enough for your parents? In this remarkable self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward drawn on case histories and the real-life voices of adult children of toxic parents to help you free yourself from the frustrating patterns of your relationship with your parents -- and discover an exciting new world of self-confidence, inner strength, and emotional independence.