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The classic memior of Betty Jean Lifton's search for her secret past that helped open the way for so many others. Betty Jean Lifton, acclaimed author of several books on the psychology of the adtoped that have helped open the field, tells her own story of growing up adtoped in the closed adoption system. Calling Twice Born both an autobiography and a psychological journey into the past, Lifton takes the reader with her as she describes the loneliness and islolation of an adopted child cut off from the knowledge of her heritage. She explores the ambivalence and guilt that she feels toward her adoptive parents when she awakens as an adult to her need to ask: Who am I? With the mounting suspense of a detective novel, Twice Born explores not only the difficulty of searching for one's past when one's records are sealed, but also the complexity of trying to reunite with the birth mother from whom one has been separated by social taboos--and by time. More than a vivid and poinant memior, Lifton has given hs a story of mothering and mother-loss attachment and bonding, secrets and lies, and the human need for origins. Important reading for anyone touched by these issues and by the experience of adoption--which is everyone.
Will You Love Me? tells the true story of Cathy's adopted daughter Lucy, who was born to a single mother who couldn't cope, and was taken into permanent foster care aged 8. By the time Lucy was fostered with Cathy she was severely distressed, withdrawn, refusing to eat and three years behind at school. But Cathy and her two children bond with Lucy quickly, and finally show her the loving home she never believed existed. Cathy has been a foster carer for over 25 years, during which time she has looked after more than 100 children, of all ages and backgrounds.
The adopted daughter of loving parents, Zara Phillips felt out of place since childhood. Although cherished, she grew up deeply insecure and alone, consumed by a void she found impossible to fill. Isolation led to alienation, until her talent brought her to the center of the heady London rock ‘n’ roll scene of the 1980s. Zara became lost in a downward spiral of drugs, alcohol and destructive relationships. An intense search for the truth of her birth led to an awakening and then to recovery. Zara’s activism for adoptee rights springs from a very personal passion. In the end, it was Zara’s experience of becoming a mother that revealed what being adopted really meant. For the first time, she gained deep understanding and compassion for both her birth mother and her adoptive mother and was able to start the healing process. Mother Me bravely illuminates the lifelong impact of adoption on every member of the adoption triad—adoptee, birth mother and adoptive mother—as well as the families of each. The tale of Zara’s search for her birth mother and her path to recovery is riveting, as are the stories of many people sharing her past.
For those who have adopted children from China this book is a must. It gives us a history easy to read about adoption both domestic and international in China.
The White Fragility for transracial adoption--practical tools for nurturing identity, unlearning white saviorism, and fixing the mistakes you don't even know you're making. If you're the white parent of a transracially or internationally adopted child, you may have been told that if you try your best and work your hardest, good intentions and a whole lot of love will be enough to give your child the security, attachment, and nurturing family life they need to thrive. The only problem? It's not true. What White Parents Should Know About Transracial Adoption breaks down the dynamics that frequently fly under the radar of the whitewashed, happily-ever-after adoption stories we hear so often. Written by Melissa Guida-Richards--a transracial, transnational, and late-discovery adoptee--this book unpacks the mistakes you don't even know you're making and gives you the real-life tools to be the best parent you can be, to the child you love more than anything. From original research, personal stories, and interviews with parents and adoptees, you'll learn: What parents wish they'd known before they adopted--and what kids wish their adoptive parents had done differently What white privilege, white saviorism, and toxic positivity are...and how they show up, even when you don't mean it How your child might feel and experience the world differently than you All about microaggressions, labeling, and implicit bias How to help your child connect with their cultural heritage through language, food, music, and clothing The 5 stages of grief for adoptive parents How to start tough conversations, work with defensiveness, and process guilt
"Mitch Albom has done it again with this moving memoir of love and loss. You can’t help but fall for Chika. A page-turner that will no doubt become a classic.” --Mary Karr, author of The Liars’ Club and The Art of Memoir From the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Tuesdays With Morrie comes Mitch Albom’s most personal story to date: an intimate and heartwarming memoir about what it means to be a family and the young Haitian orphan whose short life would forever change his heart. Chika Jeune was born three days before the devastating earthquake that decimated Haiti in 2010. She spent her infancy in a landscape of extreme poverty, and when her mother died giving birth to a baby brother, Chika was brought to The Have Faith Haiti Orphanage that Albom operates in Port Au Prince. With no children of their own, the forty-plus children who live, play, and go to school at the orphanage have become family to Mitch and his wife, Janine. Chika’s arrival makes a quick impression. Brave and self-assured, even as a three-year-old, she delights the other kids and teachers. But at age five, Chika is suddenly diagnosed with something a doctor there says, “No one in Haiti can help you with.” Mitch and Janine bring Chika to Detroit, hopeful that American medical care can soon return her to her homeland. Instead, Chika becomes a permanent part of their household, and their lives, as they embark on a two-year, around-the-world journey to find a cure. As Chika’s boundless optimism and humor teach Mitch the joys of caring for a child, he learns that a relationship built on love, no matter what blows it takes, can never be lost. Told in hindsight, and through illuminating conversations with Chika herself, this is Albom at his most poignant and vulnerable. Finding Chika is a celebration of a girl, her adoptive guardians, and the incredible bond they formed—a devastatingly beautiful portrait of what it means to be a family, regardless of how it is made.