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Sexless and sad about it? Have you noticed a significant decrease in sexual frequency and connection with your partner? In The 4 Intimacy Styles©, Licensed Relationship and Sex Expert Dr. Viviana Coles has shared her proven method of repairing broken intimacy bonds and rekindling sexual intimacy in long-term committed relationships. Take The 4 Intimacy Styles Quiz? and share the results and this book with your partner to get started on your journey to satisfying and lasting physical intimacy.
"Invaluable for so many partners looking to reconnect and grow closer together." —Gwyneth Paltrow, founder and CEO of goop "Stan Tatkin can be entirely followed into the towering infernos of our most painful relationship challenges." —Alanis Morissette, artist, activist, and wholeness advocate The complete “insider’s guide” to understanding your partner’s brain, sparking lasting connection, and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust—now with more than 170,000 copies sold. “What the heck is my partner thinking?” “Why do they always react like this?” “How can we get back that connection we had in the beginning?” If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, you aren’t alone, and it doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed. Every person is wired for love differently—with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people’s minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and routines, making it possible to neurologically prime the brain for greater love and connection and fewer conflicts. This go-to guide will show you how. Drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this highly anticipated second edition of Wired for Love presents cutting-edge research on how and why love lasts, and offers ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship. This fully revised and updated edition also includes new guidance on how to manage disagreements, as well as new exercises to help you create a sense of safety and security, establish healthy conflict ground rules, and deal with the threat of the third—any outside source which threatens the harmony in your relationship, including in-laws, alcohol, children, and affairs. You’ll find proven-effective strategies to help you strengthen your relationship by: Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening routines to stay connected Learning how to see your partner’s point of view Meeting each other halfway in a fight Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By using simple gestures and words, you’ll learn to put out emotional fires and help your partner feel appreciated and loved. You’ll also discover how to move past a “warring brain” mentality and toward a more cooperative “loving brain.” Most importantly, you’ll gain a better understanding of the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships. While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you understand how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences, and create a lasting intimate connection.
This book reflects a multi disciplinary, integrative approach to the theology and practice of relational intimacy. It combines biblical data on sexuality and relationships with marriage and bonding research. The reader is then guided in applying the research to his or her relationships. In essence, this is a handbook for understanding and deepening the stages involved in bonding or attaching closely to another human being. Marriage, the most intimate of all human relationships, is described in Scripture as a "one-flesh mystery" (Eph 5:31-32). This mystery of human bonding is as beautiful as it is complex, particularly in a post-Eden world. Many of us are woefully aware of our relational deficits, yet lack vibrant marriages around us to emulate. Those of us who have not experienced relationships of health, safety, and security particularly find we need roadmaps along the way. Our desire is that in the pages of this book readers will find personal encouragement and direction that is both biblically precise and practical for their relational journeys. Our intimacy model is built upon God's bold promises to heal and redeem. His pathways bring life; he is the one true lover of our souls. Our intimacy with him is foundational to all other relationships.
Dr. Douglas Weiss offers a 100-day practical plan that will energize your relationship and create a spiritual, emotional and physical closeness that you have hungered for in your marriage. You'll identify destructive emotional roadblocks that keep you from experiencing exciting and satisfying intimate moments with your spouse. Develop a marathon mentality for your relationship, and take the next 100 days to fall in love all over again.
“Over a decade after its publication, one book on dating has people firmly in its grip.” —The New York Times We already rely on science to tell us what to eat, when to exercise, and how long to sleep. Why not use science to help us improve our relationships? In this revolutionary book, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller scientifically explain why some people seem to navigate relationships effortlessly, while others struggle. Discover how an understanding of adult attachment—the most advanced relationship science in existence today—can help us find and sustain love. Pioneered by psychologist John Bowlby in the 1950s, the field of attachment posits that each of us behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways: • Anxious people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner's ability to love them back. • Avoidant people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness. • Secure people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving. Attached guides readers in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mate) follow, offering a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections with the people they love.
We All Crave An Authentic Experience Of Intimacy. Though our hearts crave intimacy, though our minds understand our deep need for it, the self-revelation it requires is often too daunting a task. Complete and unrestrained sharing of self exposes the deepest human fear of being rejected for being ourselves. InThe Seven Levels of Intimacy,Matthew Kelly both acknowledges and calms our fears, while teaching us how to move beyond them to experience the power of true intimacy.Matthew reveals that each relationship is built upon a pattern of interaction. In the beginning stages, we rely on casual interactions, gaining familiarity by focusing on superficialities and facts. We grow closer and begin to share our opinions, learning to accept each other and embrace the growing relationship despite the difference in our experiences and viewpoints. Once our differences and opinions are shared and accepted, we feel safe enough to reveal our hopes, dreams, and feelings, developing trust. With this trust, we open ourselves and are able to share our legitimate needs, becoming liberated from carrying the burden of our real needs alone. At last, we are deeply intimate and both willing and able to reveal our deepest fears. We are beyond judgment and feel trust and acceptance. By moving through and building upon each level of intimacy, we find comfort and gain trust in our partners and ourselves until, by developing and deepening our intimacy within each level, we are able to fully open ourselves, finally opening to the possibility of truly being loved. It is through mastering the seven levels of intimacy that we will break through to fully experiencing love, commitment, trust, and happiness.The Seven Levels of Intimacyis a brilliant and practical guide to creating and sustaining intimacy, whether you are looking for a deeper sense of connection with your spouse, looking for more fulfillment in your relationship with your boyfriend or girlfriend, trying to improve your relationships with your children, or simply wondering what you should be looking for in a partner.With profound insight and the use of powerful, everyday examples, Matthew Kelly explains how we can nurture the intimacy in our relationships.The Seven Levels of Intimacyredefines how we view our interactions with others. This new understanding leads us to successfully create the strong connections, deep joy, and lasting bonds that we all long for.
A practical step‑by‑step methodology for nurturing and sustaining our intimate relationships through first focusing on self, extending to partners, and the world We can apply the law of attraction, love languages, and every hack in the world. We can do all the yoga, spa days, workshops, and retreats we can make time for. But without an underpinning of intimacy, our experience of ourselves is soft and dreamy and lacks the kind of specificity necessary to truly know ourselves through and through. With intimacy as the foundational principle of our existence, we can build a life based on what we truly need, not what have been told we need, think we need, or what we think we should need. No matter who you are and who you like to have sex with, my intention is to arm you with a new toolkit and consciousness for cultivating the deeply connected relationships you desire and the life you deserve. Zoe Kors draws on her experience as an intimacy coach, workshop leader and sex and relationships writer, sharing her powerful--and practical--step‑by‑step methodology for nurturing and sustaining our intimate relationships over time. It addresses the essential truth that is almost universally missed in discussions of sex and intimacy: We can meet each other only to the extent that we can meet ourselves. Kors guides the reader on a five‑part journey through nine areas of opportunity for deepening intimacy with themselves, their partner, and their world, inviting them to embrace emotional, physical, and energetic self‑mastery, which is required to skillfully relate with others. Voice-driven, accessible--with the right amount of tough love--Radical Intimacy rewrites the rules (and The Rules) by: Introducing the concept of "Energetic Intimacy" as a real thing. I talk about concepts like presence and energy, in a way that is accessible and makes sense to the mainstream market (not woo-woo!) Defining and busting "The Attachment Myth"--my term for the rampant and erroneous belief that women emotionally attach to their sexual partners--rewriting the common narrative, giving women freedom and agency to own their embodied sexuality without guilt or shame. Shifting the vocabulary around sex and intimacy to feel real, organic, and unapologetic by speaking with ease and confidence about sex and sexuality--no euphemisms, no air quotes, no beating around the bush (so to speak). Telling the truth that sex is not effortless. Great sex is cultivated over time through practice. Evangelizing intimacy as an ongoing and life-altering practice that happens not just between two people, but on an individual level first. Dismantling porn-culture's stronghold on the misperception of women's bodies and sexuality so that we may respect, revere, and fall love with women (and ourselves) for the magical and varied creatures we are.
First Published in 1999. Routledge is an imprint of Taylor & Francis, an informa company.
Discusses the nature of intimacy, describes how we interact with our spouses, children, and friends, and gives practical advice on how to improve personal relationships
Encounter the power of intimacy-thrilling, grueling, and profound-through the innermost workings of the 35-year relationship between two marriage therapists.Much more than "just sex," true intimacy flows from invitations to be deeply known to another. One of our strongest emotional desires is to feel understood, received, and loved in our closest relationships. Yet, to be known and to know another deeply, especially in the context of committed partnerships, we risk pain, loneliness, and betrayal. Is intimacy worth the risk?This candid memoir begins with a husband's dramatic diagnosis and weaves marital flashbacks and counseling sessions into the progression of his disease. Despite their degrees, licenses, and the specialized knowledge they shared daily with their own clients, they faced the same challenges as everyone in lasting relationships. What would sustain them through the darkest nights of their marriage?Through the everyday decisions and extraordinary movements that compose one marriage between two therapists, we see what is possible for every couple-the exhilarating, frightening, and ultimately healing power when we accept invitations to intimacy.