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I can attest to the fact that we're not all "born with a silver spoon in our mouths." Just take a moment right now to imagine what life would be like for you if most of the things we often take for granted were not there for you. No good food, clean clothes, lack of physical and emotional security, no validation from your parents and loved ones, no proper home to live in, lack of love from your parents, inadequate heat in the cold winter, unequal treatment, no functional bathroom, and several other things that we all regard as the basics of living a comfortable life.Just imagine now that your life with the direct opposites of all the things I earlier mentioned and more. What if you had the lack of parental love and approval, exhaustion, neglect, physical abuse, emotional abuse, anxiety, anger, shame, violence, hunger, and several others.I need you to imagine that you were just a kid - a very young child in your "parents" home - but living in the environment, we earlier explained with virtually no hope of redemption from the extent of suffering you were going through. Like an endless reign of misery in your life!I have a question for you right now, how terrible and nasty does your upbringing as a child have to be before you'll undoubtedly fail in life as an adult or even die young? Did you know about the Adverse Childhood Experiences Study (ACES)? It's a research study that was carried out by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the US Health Maintenance Organization Kaiser Permanente. Well, the answer to my first question was studied by ACES. The study sought to define how terrible your childhood had to be before you're almost sure to be a failure in life. According to ACES, when it comes to factors that could cause a child to do poorly in life, they identified ten risk factors. These factors are physical abuse, emotional neglect, physical neglect, household substance abuse, sexual abuse, household mental illness, exposure to domestic violence, divorce or parental separation, emotional maltreatment and incarcerated household member. The study then proceeded to monitor thousands of kids just to evaluate how these risk factors affected their lives. After obtaining facts from their observation, they concluded that if you had about four or more of these risk factors, then the possibility of having a happy life will be below average.The study also implies that there is a high possibility that you will end up living a lousy life. We can conclude that these are mere numbers, but the truth is that based on the numbers, if you happen to have just a score of four risk factors or more, then you're battling against incredible odds in your life. After taking the ACES test, I scored seven, and this means that I had seven risk factors against me. The odds are stacked against me to the extent that no right-thinking person would have expected me to do well in life. Well, it would have been easy for you to bet against me then, but you would have also lost your fortune at the end of the day because my life turned out better than all predictions. Under normal circumstances, I should have suffered chronic anger problems, depression, and anxiety. I should have become an alcoholic and never be able to raise my family. Probably, I should have long died either by depression, drug abuse, suicide, or alcoholism.I was raised poor in a trailer, which left me with little space to seek refuge anytime I needed to escape my father's fury. My mom was a registered nurse, and my father was a Marine. The abuse I suffered started at a very early age, and it was one nightmare I would never wish my enemies to experience. My dad didn't just abuse me; I never impressed him regardless of how much effort I made or how well I performed in anything.
An empowering guide to overcoming self-defeating behaviors I can’t believe I just did that! Why does this always happen to me? I really should stop myself from . . . Sound familiar? Whether we’re aware of it or not, most of us are guilty of self-sabotage. These behaviors can manifest in seemingly innocuous ways, but if left unchecked can create stress and cause problems in all areas of your life. In The Healthy Mind Toolkit, Dr. Alice Boyes provides easy, practical solutions that will help you identify how you’re holding yourself back and how to reverse your self-sabotaging behaviors. Blending scientific research with techniques from cognitive behavioral therapy, this engaging book will take you through the steps to address this overarching problem, including how to: • Identify the specific ways you're hurting your success in all aspects of your life • Capitalize on the positive aspects of your extreme traits instead of the negatives • Find creative solutions to curb your self-defeating patterns • Practice self-care as a problem-solving strategy Filled with quizzes and insightful exercises to personalize your journey from harmful behaviors to healthy habits, The Healthy Mind Toolkit is the essential guide to get out of your own way and get on the path to success.
Woohoo Storytime! Roys Bedoys learns what bad manners are at a restaurant. This is a great book for children to learn good manners.
A groundbreaking guide to raising responsible, capable, happy kids Based on the latest research on brain development and extensive clinical experience with parents, Dr. Laura Markham’s approach is as simple as it is effective. Her message: Fostering emotional connection with your child creates real and lasting change. When you have that vital connection, you don’t need to threaten, nag, plead, bribe—or even punish. This remarkable guide will help parents better understand their own emotions—and get them in check—so they can parent with healthy limits, empathy, and clear communication to raise a self-disciplined child. Step-by-step examples give solutions and kid-tested phrasing for parents of toddlers right through the elementary years. If you’re tired of power struggles, tantrums, and searching for the right “consequence,” look no further. You’re about to discover the practical tools you need to transform your parenting in a positive, proven way.
Don't blame me! Or do.
Provides answers for keeping everyday problems in the workplace, family or neighborhood from becoming "high-conflict" disputes.
A large segment of the population struggles with feelings of being detached from themselves and their loved ones. They feel flawed, and blame themselves. Running on Empty will help them realize that they're suffering not because of something that happened to them in childhood, but because of something that didn't happen. It's the white space in their family picture, the background rather than the foreground. This will be the first self-help book to bring this invisible force to light, educate people about it, and teach them how to overcome it.
"Readers will be drawn to this book because their lives have been affected, even devastated, by anger. Job loss, divorce, family estrangement, substance abuse, and imprisonment are just some of the potential fallouts from uncontrolled anger. Many people do not know how to start making changes to turn destructive anger into healthy anger. This book offers understanding and tools for making those changes. In helping readers understand anger, psychologist Bernie Golden explains that while anger serves a purpose, it can easily become destructive. In this book he offers strategies to overcome anger that
Leadership development consultant Michael Timms has discovered three powerful habits that not only make one a better leader, but also encourage those they lead to take greater accountability themselves. Using a compelling combination of teaching principles and illustrations backed by loads of scientific studies, Timms reveals three habits of personal accountability that are easy to implement and which can instantly begin transforming positional leaders into true leaders who inspire everyone to take more accountability for results.
Let's be real, it's easy to blame others, bad relationships, childhood experiences, bad influences and environments for your circumstances, but he "Blame Game" gets you nowhere! The truth is, you are responsible for everything in your life. This includes your choices and decisions, your reactions to people and situations, and your ability to overcome obstacles and move beyond perceived limitations. When you blame someone or something else, you are not taking responsibility for yourself and you give away your power to change your circumstances. In this book, advice columnist and personal success coach, Tamara Hartley, shares some of her most difficult life experiences and how she used to blame everyone around her for her life; including her parents, classmates, teachers, spouse, coworkers, and Oprah Winfrey (YES, even Oprah)! She talks openly about real-life issues and sticky situations that many of us face. From being a teenage and single parent, to being teased and taunted in high school, experiencing breakups and bad relationships, enduring financial hardships, and being stuck in a dead-end career. Tamara then shares the greatest life lessons she learned through these difficult situations when she stopped blaming others, took full responsibility for herself, and took back control of her life. Known for her candid and transparent style and "keeping it real," Tamara reveals personal details about her journey and the choices and decisions she made that shaped her experiences. Each chapter shares a story, a lesson learned, and the choice Tamara made to move beyond each situation and to move her life forward. At the end of each chapter is a special opportunity for you, the reader, to reflect on your own journey and experiences. You too have the power to change your life and make new and better choices to create the life you want and deserve! But first, you have to stop blaming others for your life and take back control of your life, relationships and career.