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With a triadic perspective, this autoethnographic narrative explores the temporal, situated nature of interactions between the author as an adoptee with her adult adopted children as well as those between herself and her birth father and mother. The epiphanic adoptive family narratives that are foregrounded seek to deepen and challenge understanding of how kinship affinities are experienced. The autoethnographic narratives are written in a critical, evocative style which is valuable for two reasons. Firstly, the processes of reflexive self-introspection, self-observation and dialogue with relational others have established a critical connection between recognising and responding to kinship affinities and personal growth. Secondly, lying at the intersection of the self and other this narrative contributes to deepening insights around epistemic in/justice in adoptive kinship. This book will be of interest to educators and scholars of adoption in offering an insider perspective on unique family relationships as well as how the author undertakes critical evocative autoethnography. Adoptees, adoptive parents, and birth parents will also find the narratives in Part II of this book of particular interest in informing an understanding of kin relationships and how these may be subject to change over time.
Evelyn Robinson, OAM, has written four books about adoption separation and reunion. This is her first book. What becomes of women who are separated from their children by adoption? Why do so many adopted people feel such a strong desire to seek out their families of origin? In what ways are families with adopted children different from other families? This book by Evelyn Robinson provides the answers to these questions and many others.'Adoption and Loss - The Hidden Grief' was first published in 2000. A revised edition was published in 2003 and the 21st Century edition was published in 2018.
Originally published in 1993, this classic piece of literature on adoption has revolutionised the way people think about adopted children. Nancy Verrier examines the life-long consequences of the 'primal wound' - the wound that is caused when a child is separated from its mother - for adopted people. Her argument is supported by thorough research in pre- and perinatal psychology, attachment, bonding and the effects of loss.
A passionate love affair between high school sweethearts creates an accidental pregnancy during a sultry night on the shore of Lake Michigan. Rebecca's unforgiving parents banish her to an unwed mother's home where she secretly gives birth to a baby girl. Her daughter Judy is placed in the loving care of foster parents before being callously given to Mario and Rosella Romano for adoption on her first birthday. Reoccurring visions and fantasies of her birthmother plague Judy's consciousness for three decades until a life-changing passage into adulthood causes her to question why she was abandoned. What begins as a simple investigation into her medical and ancestral history slowly evolves into a passionate quest to discover her roots. Through good timing, perseverance, and a few small miracles, Judy eventually solves the mystery of her origins. But will the woman she has been seeking welcome Judy back into her life? About the Authors Judith and Martin Land live in Colorado and Arizona. They told the entire story of Judith Land's adoption, from her birth through adulthood, to provide the reader with unique insights into the mind of an adoptee at various stages of her life.
This book explains the role of separation trauma in the life of adoptees and birth mothers and how that trauma affects the neurological system. It demonstrates how the inner, fearful child may be running the lives of adoptees. It shows how the meaning we give to events determines our beliefs and how those beliefs control our feelings, attitudes and behavior. It gives guidelines for discovering the authentic self and for becoming accountable for our impact on others.
Whereas adoption was once a private affair cloaked in secrecy and sealed records, adoptions in the US today are increasingly open - that is, birth and adoptive families meet and become acquainted before the adoption, and remain in contact once it is complete. Experts agree that open adoption comes with many benefits for both birth families and adoptive families and their children, but what does it actually look like for families experiencing it, and what can we learn from those experiences? Open Adoption and Diverse Families reveals the strengths, vulnerabilities, daily struggles and triumphs of adoptive families today. Drawing on extensive interviews with lesbian, gay, and heterosexual parents, many of whom adopted transracially, psychologist Abbie Goldberg confronts the extraordinary questions that open adoption poses: How do adoptive parents feel about openness when they first learn about it, and why do their feelings change over time? How does contact unfold and evolve as a child grows? What types of boundary challenges arise between adoptive and birth family members, particularly in the age of social media and networking? How do adoptive parents talk about adoption with their children, and how does this vary depending on level and type of contact with birth families? Confronting head-on difficult subjects such as birth parents' mental illness and racial differences between birth and adoptive families, Open Adoption and Diverse Families chronicles the decisions and dynamics that adoptive parents sign up for when they pursue option adoption, and is a must-read for all families pursuing or experiencing this exceptional approach to building a family.
A study of the consequences of adoptee-birth mother reunion that follows 60 adult adoptees and their attempts to make contact with birth mothers, and relates the difficulties they encounter in a world where biological kinship governs. Of interest to professionals in the field of adoption, as well as adoptees, adoptive parents, and birth parents. Canadian card number: C94-932735-2. Annotation copyright by Book News, Inc., Portland, OR
Bestselling author Harriet Lerner focuses on the challenge and the importance of being able to express one's "authentic voice" in intimate relationships. The key problem in relationships, particularly over time, is that people begin to lose their voice. Despite decades of assertiveness training and lots of good advice about communicating with clarity, timing, and tact, women and men find that their greatest complaints in marriage and other intimate relationships are that they are not being heard, that they cannot affect the other person, that fights go nowhere, that conflict brings only pain. Although an intimate, long-term relationship offers the greatest possibilities for knowing the other person and being known, these relationships are also fertile ground for silence and frustration when it comes to articulating a true self. And yet giving voice to this self is at the center of having both a relationship and a self. Much as she did in THE MOTHER DANCE, Lerner will approach this rich subject with tales from her personal life and clinical work, inspiring and teaching readers to speak their own truths to the most important people in their lives.