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A leading authority on adoption and an award-winning writer bring wisdom and clarity to situations important to all adoptive parents. Real Parents, Real Children goes beyond the question of when to tell children they are adopted with practical advice for parents on how to talk with their children about adoption - not just once but throughout childhood, adolescence, and into young adulthood - and how to help them through the rougher points of growing up adopted. Authors Holly van Gulden and Lisa Bartels-Rabb offer insight into how adopted children at each age commonly think and feel about being adopted. They also explain how and why adopted children grieve for their birth parents and suggest ways adoptive parents can help them come to a healthy resolution of this grief. For prospective parents, the authors discuss ways to prepare themselves and the child they are about to adopt for the new family union. Throughout, the special concerns and challenges of interracial, international, and older-child adoptions are also addressed. Though written with parents in mind, Real Parents, Real Children provides the clinical information that professional therapists, counselors, and placement workers must have if they are to truly be of help to adoptive families at every stage of their lives. Real Parents, Real Children fills a real gap in adoption literature and offers confidence and assurance as well as sought-after answers to lifelong question.
When 12-year-old Andy meets Laurie and Jeff at an adoption party, he has already been in eight foster homes. Andy s alcoholic mother has given him up to the state as too hard to handle, and his father is in jail. Andy longs for a loving home and parents he can trust, but his attention deficit disorder, combined with the legacy of his dysfunctional parents, causes him to constantly challenge authority. He steals, destroys property, gets in trouble at school, tries to make a gunpowder bomb, and accuses Jeff, his soon-to-be father, of touching him inappropriately. To make matters worse, Andy s real father shows up asking for money. But Andy s new parents refuse to give up on him, and Andy must fight to save his soon-to-be-father s reputation and his own chance at having a real family."
An anthology of personal essays written by parents of children with ADD, ADHD, OCD, PDD, ASDs, SPD, PBD and/or other alphabet soup diagnoses that takes the already difficult job of parenting and adds to the challenge. These essays focus on honest feelings, lessons learned, epiphanies, commonplace and extraordinary experiences. They are written by parents of toddlers, young children, teens, and adult children; those who are in the parenting trenches now, and those looking back on their parenting experiences. Topics include: how children came to be diagnosed, the experience of dealing with problem behaviors in various contexts and settings, experiences with/feelings about treatment (therapies, medications, alternative treatments), school (and other advocacy) experiences, children's social interactions/friends, and the effect of parenting a difficult child on a parent's emotional and physical health, marriage, and other relationships.
Sought-after answers to lifelong question.
"Christian families today often find themselves stuck between two stories—their own family’s story and God’s story. It’s like they’re living two lives: their Christian life and their “real world” life. The trick is figuring out how to get your family’s story to line up with God’s story in the world around us, helping you raise children who have the character, values, and mission that allows them to go out into the real world and live out a real faith.Real World Parents is a parenting book that helps you to be proactive, rather than reactive, when it comes to raising Christian kids in a world that is filled with contradictions to a life of faith. Rather than trying to raise kids who are “good Christians,” you’ll find the tools to help you live out a faith that allows your children to see what it means to live as a Christian. As a result, your kids will learn about real faith by living it out with you.Culture expert and veteran youth pastor, Mark Matlock, will help you explore issues such as:• Helping your child make decisions• The importance of failure• Knowing God’s story for your family• Changing the story your family is in• The pursuit of wisdom, and much moreGod has placed us here to interact with and represent him to the world by engaging with the culture—not retreating from it. Rather than trying to isolate your children from the world or draw lines that keep them from truly engaging in the world God calls us to help and heal, you can learn how to lead your family towards an integrated life where your story and God’s story come together to make a difference in the world around you."
"Dr Philip Dembo presents in his new book, THE PARENT COACH, a model of parenting that finally addresses our nations ongoing crisis...We are raising children with little or no character or conscience. The generations of young people have little work ethic, little worry about how their actions affect others, and seem to want it all with little sacrifice. The book looks at the current parenting strategies as a contributor to the underdevelopment of children today. Parents, in all their effort to gain compliance from their children, are actually interfering with their development. What do we do now? How do we undo what we have been doing? THE PARENT COACH gives us a model that links the development of a child's ""true voice"" with his/her actual experience to the strategies of parents and their important role in ""coaching"" their child's journey through their own growth. "
"Birthdays may be difficult for me." "I want you to take the initiative in opening conversations about my birth family." "When I act out my fears in obnoxious ways, please hang in there with me." "I am afraid you will abandon me." The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the twenty complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love--that he must grieve his loss now if he is to receive love fully in the future--that she needs honest information about her birth family no matter how painful the details may be--and that although he may choose to search for his birth family, he will always rely on you to be his parents. Filled with powerful insights from children, parents, and experts in the field, plus practical strategies and case histories that will ring true for every adoptive family, Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew is an invaluable guide to the complex emotions that take up residence within the heart of the adopted child--and within the adoptive home.
Without avoiding the grim statistics, this book reveals the real hope that hurting children can be healed through adoptive and foster parents, social workers, and others who care. Includes information on foreign adoptions.
A NATIONAL BESTSELLER This beloved memoir "is an extraordinary, honest, nuanced and compassionate look at adoption, race in America and families in general" (Jasmine Guillory, Code Switch, NPR) What does it means to lose your roots—within your culture, within your family—and what happens when you find them? Nicole Chung was born severely premature, placed for adoption by her Korean parents, and raised by a white family in a sheltered Oregon town. From childhood, she heard the story of her adoption as a comforting, prepackaged myth. She believed that her biological parents had made the ultimate sacrifice in the hope of giving her a better life, that forever feeling slightly out of place was her fate as a transracial adoptee. But as Nicole grew up—facing prejudice her adoptive family couldn’t see, finding her identity as an Asian American and as a writer, becoming ever more curious about where she came from—she wondered if the story she’d been told was the whole truth. With warmth, candor, and startling insight, Nicole Chung tells of her search for the people who gave her up, which coincided with the birth of her own child. All You Can Ever Know is a profound, moving chronicle of surprising connections and the repercussions of unearthing painful family secrets—vital reading for anyone who has ever struggled to figure out where they belong.
Originally published in 1993, this classic piece of literature on adoption has revolutionised the way people think about adopted children. Nancy Verrier examines the life-long consequences of the 'primal wound' - the wound that is caused when a child is separated from its mother - for adopted people. Her argument is supported by thorough research in pre- and perinatal psychology, attachment, bonding and the effects of loss.