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Seventy now-adult children of divorce give their candid and often heart-wrenching answers to eight questions (arranged in eight chapters, by question), including: What were the main effects of your parents' divorce on your life? What do you say to those who claim that "children are resilient" and "children are happy when their parents are happy"? What would you like to tell your parents then and now? What do you want adults in our culture to know about divorce? What role has your faith played in your healing? Their simple and poignant responses are difficult to read and yet not without hope. Most of the contributors--women and men, young and old, single and married--have never spoken of the pain and consequences of their parents' divorce until now. They have often never been asked, and they believe that no one really wants to know. Despite vastly different circumstances and details, the similarities in their testimonies are striking; as the reader will discover, the death of a child's family impacts the human heart in universal ways.
Michele Lowrance is a practicing domestic relations Judge who over the last four years has seen one hundred percent of divorcing couples who followed her principles avoid trial. Utilizing her expertise as a former divorce attorney and family court judge, Judge Michele offers concrete advice from the bench, real-life stories, no-nonsense tools, so that you will be able to prevent collateral damage and protect what we all value most. Life goes on and the decisions we make during this process must endure as well. Michele F. Lowrance has been a domestic-relations Judge in the Circuit Court of Illinois since 1995. A child of divorce who was raised by her grandparents, Judge Lowrance is twice divorced. She has devoted her professional life to helping those similarly situated.
Parenting today’s teens is not for cowards. Your teenager is facing unprecedented and confusing pressures, temptations, and challenges in today’s culture. Mark Gregston has helped teens and their parents through every struggle imaginable, and now he shares his biblical, practical insights with you in bite-size pieces. Punctuated with Scriptures, prayers, and penetrating questions, these one-page devotions will give you the wisdom and assurance you need to guide your teen through these years and reach the other side with relationships intact.
Based on research from more than 10,000 surveys from children and parents of divorce, Collateral Damage presents parents with an overview of the negative impact that divorce has on their children and offers ways to better serve their needs at this critical time. Approximately fifty percent of marriages in the United State fail. Add to that the increasing number of couples who never marry, have children together, and later go their separate ways. In all of these scenarios, children suffer greatly—often in silence, as parents do not know how to effectively guide their kids. When the sorrow and emotional issues of children are not addressed, the cycle of divorce is likely to continue for them and in generations that follow. In addition, while children may appear to be resilient and adjusting, without proper support children of divorce are more prone to drug and alcohol abuse, criminal behavior, mental and physical illness, and suicide. How can parents manage their own hurt, shock, anger, and despair so that they can provide their children with what they need? While Collateral Damage does not advocate divorce, it does sound a wakeup call for parents. It identifies the landmines inherent in the dangerous terrain of divorce and equips them to help their children not to feel abandoned or unheard. Topics covered include: Building the family—not losing it Tuning into your kids Stabilizing childhood Maintaining parent/child roles Avoiding the parenting handoff Keeping kids out of the war zone Instilling trust Keeping open lines of communication Attuning to guiding, spiritual resources The unfortunate failure of a marriage does not mean the end of the family. Providing a stable, supportive, healthy relationship with your child demonstrates what a loving relationship looks like, better preparing them for intimate relationships and marriage as an adult.
Emery reviews the psychological, social, economic, and legal consequences of divorce, and examines how children's risk or resilience is predicted by interparental conflict, relationships with both parents, financial strain, legal/physical custody, and other factors."--BOOK JACKET.
Making your marriage healthy—and making it last—has never been harder. In an age when the pressures on marriage are heavy and divorce is more accepted and easier to obtain, marriages seem to fail as often as they succeed. When you come from a home of divorce, making your own marriage work is even tougher than the norm. Fortunately, in Breaking the Cycle of Divorce, author John Trent, an adult child of divorce himself, gives you the encouragement, insight, and tools you need to beat the odds. Learn how you can, in fact, succeed where your parents failed.
Your Insurance Policy Against The Kind of Divorce Everybody Fears Divorce does not need to become the defining moment of the rest of your life. Using her insight and expertise as a family-court judge and former divorce attorney, Judge Lowrance presents a revolutionary guide for people facing the turmoil of divorce. The Good Karma Divorce offers concrete and battle-tested advice, real-life examples, no-nonsense tools, and practical checklists. With Judge Lowrance's guidance we can avoid the black hole of litigation and create a good karma divorce, opening up a new world of hope and possibility.
Are your kids growing up in a war zone? Here's Your Peace Treaty When co-parents conflict, their kids get caught in the middle. They become 'adultified,' infantilized, and alienated. They're made into messengers and spies, implicitly forced to grow up too fast or to remain needy for much too long. The antidote: practicing child-centered parenting--consistently creating parenting plans and conflict resolution strategies that genuinely meet children's emotional and psychological needs--first and foremost and for the rest of their lives. Keeping Kids out of the Middle is not about divorce, and it's not about you. It is about your kids. This eye-opening and highly pragmatic book is a here-and-now guide toward better understanding and meeting the needs of your children. You will learn what child-centered parenting is, how to implement it productively, and how to communicate effectively with your parenting partners, no matter the legal status of your relationship, the distance between your homes, or the quality of your intimate relationship. In Keeping Kids out of the Middle, child psychologist and state certified Guardian ad litem Benjamin Garber offers parents a radically new perspective on co-parenting in the midst of relationship conflict and teaches co-parents how to build a consistent, healthy environment for their children through the art of 'scripting,' establish better means of communicating and communication styles, and create parenting plans that help keep children protected. Thisis your guide to putting your children's needs first and giving them the safety net they must have in order to become healthy adults who are able themselves, to some day, keep their own kids out of the middle.
Offers diary entries from both parents and children and stresses that understanding the child's point of view is essential in dealing with a divorce.
How do survivors of child abuse, bullying, chronic oppression and discrimination, and other developmental traumas adapt to such unimaginable situations? It is taken for granted that experiences such as hearing voices, altered states of consciousness, dissociative states, lack of trust, and intense emotions are inherently problematic. But what does the evidence actually show? And how much do we still need to learn?