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In high school, I was in love with Hunter Ness, but he friend-zoned me. Time passed. I grew up. He went to prison. And now he's going to be my husband for a year. There are reasons. He's not going to be a real husband. Just a practice husband so he can have a job and a place to live and I can finally experience parts of life I've only read about before. We're just friends, and I'm helping him out. But still... He's way too sexy, and he knows me far too well. It's hard to remember he's not the real thing. But I'm going to stay smart. I'm not going to fall for my ex-con husband who only sees me as a friend. I hope.
*A New York Times Bestseller* A warm and hilarious memoir by a man diagnosed with Asperger syndrome who sets out to save his relationship. Five years after David Finch married Kristen, the love of his life, they learned that he has Asperger syndrome. The diagnosis explained David’s ever-growing list of quirks and compulsions, but it didn’t make him any easier to live with. Determined to change, David set out to understand Asperger syndrome and learn to be a better husband with an endearing zeal. His methods for improving his marriage involve excessive note-taking, performance reviews, and most of all, the Journal of Best Practices: a collection of hundreds of maxims and hard-won epiphanies, including “Don’t change the radio station when she’s singing along” and “Apologies do not count when you shout them.” David transforms himself from the world’s most trying husband to the husband who tries the hardest. He becomes the husband he’d always meant to be. Filled with humor and wisdom, The Journal of Best Practices is a candid story of ruthless self-improvement, a unique window into living with an autism spectrum condition, and proof that a true heart is the key to happy marriage.
On a Wednesday afternoon, I ask Trevor Bentley to marry me. He might be the most arrogant, obnoxious man I know, but I need him to be my husband for a year. There are reasons. He's not going to be a real husband. Just part-time. Yes, I have to live with him. And, okay, I also have to share his bed. And, sure, he's the sexiest and most exciting thing to ever happen to my controlled, organized life. But still... It's only a part-time marriage. I'm not going to give him my heart. I know what I'm doing, and I'm too smart to fall for my husband. I hope.
Reprint of the original, first published in 1881.
On a Wednesday afternoon, I ask Damian Winters to marry me. To be clear, it's not a proposal. It's a business transaction. I have a sticky family situation, and the simplest way to deal with it is to pay him to be my husband for six months. Damian used to work as an escort so he knows how to keep things professional. We don't have to be friends. We don't even have to get along. I need someone fill a husband role, and he'll do just fine. It doesn't matter if he's the hottest man I've ever met. Work takes up all my time and energy, so I don't have room in my life for complications. I'm not going to fall into bed with him. And I'm definitely not going to fall in love. I hope.