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People react very differently to the process of ageing. Some people shy away from old age for as long as they can and eventually spend it reflecting on times when they were physically and mentally stronger and more independent. For others old age is embraced as a new adventure and something to look forward to. In this book psychoanalyst Danielle Quinodoz highlights the value of old age and the fact that although many elderly people have suffered losses, either of their own good health or through bereavement, most have managed to retain the most important thing – their sense of self. Quinodoz argues that growing old provides us with the opportunity to learn more about ourselves and instead of facing it with dread, it should be celebrated. Divided into accessible chapters this book covers topics including: the internal life-history remembering phases of life anxiety about death being a psychoanalyst and growing old. Throughout Growing Old the author draws on both her clinical experience of working with the elderly, and her own personal experience of growing old. This makes it an interesting read for both practising psychoanalysts, and those who wish to gain a greater insight of the natural progression into later life.
Growing older is a process. Growing old is a conclusion. If you're growing older you see some hope because you have perspective and you keep learning. If you've grown old, you may cynically think that times have never been as bad as they are now, and that they can only get worse. This book is about learning how to "make peace with where you are right now." It's about learning from the past and then moving past it. It's about growing--personally, spiritually, and in our relationships with God and with others. If we think properly about growing older we'll never have to grow old.
Would you like to grow in life-giving ways as you age? Do you have the courage to let go of former ways of thinking to receive God's love and life in new ways? As we age, we experience the loss of physical stamina, independence, and career fulfillment. Yet within each of these losses is a holy invitation to grow. God calls us to let go of our need for accomplishment and embrace the gift of fruitfulness so that we might be transformed in this final season of our lives. In Aging Faithfully, spiritual director Alice Fryling explores how to navigate the journey of retirement, lifestyle changes, and new limitations. In this season of life, we are invited to hold both grief and hope, to acknowledge ways of thinking that no longer represent who we are, and to receive peace in the midst of our fears. We all age differently, and God calls each of us to new spiritual birth as we mature. When we embrace the aging process, we grow closer to God and experience his grace as he renews us from within. Whether you are approaching the beginning, middle, or end of your senior years, you are invited. Come and be transformed. Aging Faithfully includes questions for group discussion and suggestions for personal meditation.
Growing Up Again offers guidance on providing children with the structure and nurturing that are so critical to their healthy development -- and to our own. As time-tested as it is timely, the expert advice in Growing Up Again Second Edition has helped thousands of readers improve on their parenting practices. Now, substantially revised and expanded, Growing Up Again offers further guidance on providing children with the structure and nurturing that are so critical to their healthy development -- and to our own. Jean Illsley Clarke and Connie Dawson provide the information every adult caring for children should know -- about ages and stages of development, ways to nurture our children and ourselves, and tools for personal and family growth. This new edition also addresses the special demands of parenting adopted children and the problem of overindulgence; a recognition and exploration of prenatal life and our final days as unique life stages; new examples of nurturing, structuring, and discounting, as well as concise ways to identify them; help for handling parenting conflicts in blended families, and guidelines on supporting children's spiritual growth.About the Authors:Jean Illsley Clarke is a parent educator, teacher trainer, the author of Self-Esteem: A Family Affair, and co-author of the Help! for Parents series. She is a popular international lecturer and workshop presenter on the topics of self-esteem, parenting, family dynamics, and adult children of alcoholics. Clarke resides in Plymouth, Minnesota.Connie Dawson is a consultant and lecturer who works with adults who work with kids. A former teacher, she trains youth workers to identify and help young people who are at risk. Dawson lives in Evergreen, Colorado.
Author, activist, and TED speaker Ashton Applewhite has written a rousing manifesto calling for an end to discrimination and prejudice on the basis of age. In our youth obsessed culture, we’re bombarded by media images and messages about the despairs and declines of our later years. Beauty and pharmaceutical companies work overtime to convince people to purchase products that will retain their youthful appearance and vitality. Wrinkles are embarrassing. Gray hair should be colored and bald heads covered with implants. Older minds and bodies are too frail to keep up with the pace of the modern working world and olders should just step aside for the new generation. Ashton Applewhite once held these beliefs too until she realized where this prejudice comes from and the damage it does. Lively, funny, and deeply researched, This Chair Rocks traces her journey from apprehensive boomer to pro-aging radical, and in the process debunks myth after myth about late life. Explaining the roots of ageism in history and how it divides and debases, Applewhite examines how ageist stereotypes cripple the way our brains and bodies function, looks at ageism in the workplace and the bedroom, exposes the cost of the all-American myth of independence, critiques the portrayal of elders as burdens to society, describes what an all-age-friendly world would look like, and offers a rousing call to action. It’s time to create a world of age equality by making discrimination on the basis of age as unacceptable as any other kind of bias. Whether you’re older or hoping to get there, this book will shake you by the shoulders, cheer you up, make you mad, and change the way you see the rest of your life. Age pride! “Wow. This book totally rocks. It arrived on a day when I was in deep confusion and sadness about my age. Everything about it, from my invisibility to my neck. Within four or five wise, passionate pages, I had found insight, illumination, and inspiration. I never use the word empower, but this book has empowered me.” —Anne Lamott, New York Times bestselling author
This exquisitely giftable anthology of poems about age and aging reveals the wisdom of trailblazing writers who found power and growth later in life. At eighty-two, the novelist Penelope Lively wrote: "Our experience is one unknown to most of humanity, over time. We are the pioneers." Coming to Age is a collection of dispatches from the great poet-pioneers who have been fortunate enough to live into their later years. Those later years can be many things: a time of harvesting, of gathering together the various strands of the past and weaving them into a rich fabric. They can also be a new beginning, an exploration of the unknown. We speak of "growing old." And indeed, as we too often forget, aging is growing, growing into a new stage of life, one that can be a fulfillment of all that has come before. To everything there is a season. Poetry speaks to them all. Just as we read newspapers for news of the world, we read poetry for news of ourselves. Poets, particularly those who have lived and written into old age, have much to tell us. Bringing together a range of voices both present and past, from Emily Dickinson and W. H. Auden to Louise Gluck and Li-Young Lee, Coming to Age reveals new truths, offers spiritual sustenance, and reminds us of what we already know but may have forgotten, illuminating the profound beauty and significance of commonplace moments that become more precious and radiant as we grow older.
Just a few of the vitally important lessons in caring for your aging parent—and yourself—from Jane Gross in A Bittersweet Season As painful as the role reversal between parent and child may be for you, assume it is worse for your mother or father, so take care not to demean or humiliate them. Avoid hospitals and emergency rooms, as well as multiple relocations from home to assisted living facility to nursing home, since all can cause dramatic declines in physical and cognitive well-being among the aged. Do not accept the canard that no decent child sends a parent to a nursing home. Good nursing home care, which supports the entire family, can be vastly superior to the pretty trappings but thin staffing of assisted living or the solitude of being at home, even with round-the-clock help. Important Facts Every state has its own laws, eligibility standards, and licensing requirements for financial, legal, residential, and other matters that affect the elderly, including qualification for Medicare. Assume anything you understand in the state where your parents once lived no longer applies if they move. Many doctors will not accept new Medicare patients, nor are they legally required to do so, especially significant if a parent is moving a long distance to be near family in old age. An adult child with power of attorney can use a parent’s money for legitimate expenses and thus hasten the spend-down to Medicaid eligibility. In other words, you are doing your parent no favor—assuming he or she is likely to exhaust personal financial resources—by paying rent, stocking the refrigerator, buying clothes, or taking him or her to the hairdresser or barber.
"Growing Old is unlike anything you've read before about old age. It's not a chirpy guidebook to successful aging (often written by people in their forties and fifties—who haven't gotten there yet!) but something far deeper and revelatory. By turns hilarious, poignant, fascinating, and disturbing, every page is brutally honest. If you ever plan to grow old or know anyone else who's already there, you'll find insights here you'll see nowhere else." — Sy Montgomery, New York Times bestselling author of The Soul of an Octopus “Written by one of our most distinguished observers of human and animal behavior who has now decided to observe herself, this book is a witty, wise, frank, and ultimately comforting look--from the inside out--at the universal experience of growing old.” — Dale Peterson, author of Jane Goodall: The Woman Who Redefined Man and The Ghosts of Gombe “This is a true gift. Elizabeth has trekked the Arctic Circle and lived with the Bushmen—not your typical human. Yet, she shares how time catches up with us all. Her unexpectedly delightful book made me realize the good decisions my grandparents made, and think about how I should should approach my own future. A unique look at a universal process that we need not fear—and might come to relish.” — Dr. Mark W. Moffett, anthropologist-explorer and author of The Human Swarm: How Our Societies Arise, Thrive, and Fall "Octogenarian Thomas tackles old age in this clever and astute memoir…Thomas is an inspiring example of a life well lived, and her sense of humor, honesty, and curiosity will resonate.” — Publisher’s Weekly, STARRED review "With wit and humor, Thomas thoughtfully conveys the realities of aging. This fully absorbing memoir will especially resonate with readers over 65 and those who work with geriatric populations, yet all readers should find much wisdom to be gained from this warm offering." — Library Journal "Thomas turns her curiosity about all things natural toward a subject that many choose to ignore, willfully or not....With each age-related topic, Thomas writes candidly and with occasional dark humor, sharing both the good and the bad...." — Kirkus Reviews
A groundbreaking approach to aging from one of France's best- known clinical psychologists. How should we accept growing old? It's an inevitable progression and yet in Western society the very subject of aging is often taboo and shrouded in anxiety and shame. Not anymore, says Marie de Hennezel, an internationally renowned clinical psychologist and bestselling author. Now that our lives are longer and richer than ever before, it's imperative to demystify our greatest fear and cultivate a positive awareness of aging. In this timely and essential book, de Hennezel offers a fresh perspective on the art of growing old. She confronts head-on the inevitable grief we sustain at the loss of our youth and explains how refusing to age and move forward in life is actually what makes us become old. Combining personal anecdotes with psychological theory, philosophy, and eye-opening scientific research from around the world, she shows why we should look forward to embracing everything aging has to offer in terms of human and spiritual enrichment. The Art of Growing Old is a thought-provoking, brave, and uplifting meditation on the later years as they should be lived.