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When his mother-in-law died suddenly and his seriously ill father-in-law was left with no one to care for him, the author and his wife were thrust into the complex and overwhelming world of long-term care. Just months later his own father fell sick, and the couple struggled to help care for him too—from 1000 miles away. Over the next year-and-a-half, this ordinary family faced one crisis after another, as each day brought new struggle and pain, but also surprising rewards. They were among the 44 million Americans who are caring for elderly parents or relatives or friends with disabilities. Someone you love will almost certainly need long-term care services before they die. Nearly 70 percent of our parents will receive such help sometime during their old age—usually at home, though often in a nursing home. It will last for an average of three years, though one in five will need this assistance for five years or more. This book tells the sometimes painful, sometimes uplifting, and always compelling stories of the families who struggle every day with the care needs of their loved ones. The costs are crushing: and the weight of 77 million aging Baby Boomers will devastate our nation's already fragile system for funding this critical day-to-day assistance. How can we repair the tattered safety net that is so essential to our aged and disabled?
This book is a “must read” for anyone who is presently caring for their aging parents, anyone who will eventually care for their aging parents or anyone planning on growing older. The author brings her decades of professional experiences as a psychotherapist, an attorney, a coach and a daughter to this book. She simultaneously chronicles her own heart-warming and touching journey as well as providing a comprehensive guide on doing effective family caregiving in the 21st century. Many report feeling “deeply understood” reading this book as they resonated with the candid revelations of the author’s inner struggles. Others find hers “a sane voice in a difficult world.” You will not be disappointed with reading the dilemmas, insights and decisions told in “My Story,” as you see what can be learned from this expert’s mistakes as well as her successes. Jane Wolf Frances offers many valuable tips and insights as she guides you from the beginning of the POPcycle, as she’s termed it, all the way to the end of her own parents’ lives. Whether you’re one of the 75 million Americans who are lucky enough to be “ParentingOurParents,” or you’re still struggling with overwhelm and confusion, you’ll need to know what’s being offered here. You will learn how you can: read the signs your parents need help; have “the talk” with your folks; make crucial decisions to get the maximum benefits available; enroll more family to be on the team; balance the elements in the new life you’re taking on as ParentingOurParents will change your life; transform the remarkable challenges of role reversals - legal, emotional, practical, residential - into a true journey of love.
Loaded with humor and heart,The Night Our Parents Went Outis the only picture book on the market to reassure kids that their parents can handle a date night. In this book, two children brew up increasingly wild adventures that befall mom and dad in an evening. From runaway hot air balloons to vampire movie ushers, the kids reveal that when they are nervous, theirimaginative prowess kicks into high gear. For the fortunate babysitter,The Night Our Parents Went Outis the perfect way to lighten the atmosphere and make the kids feel comfortable when theirparents depart.
Named one of Esquire's "Best Nonfiction Books of 2018" "Sharp and searching...a potent look at the fraught, painful, and complicated relationship between parents and children, and the mysteries — revelatory, difficult — that can and cannot be solved." — Boston Globe Anya Yurchyshyn grew up in a narrow townhouse in Boston, every corner filled with the souvenirs of her parents’ adventurous international travels. On their trips to Egypt, Italy, and Saudi Arabia, her mother, Anita, and her father, George, lived an entirely separate life from the one they led as the parents of Anya and her sister – one that Anya never saw. The parents she knew were a brittle, manipulative alcoholic and a short-tempered disciplinarian: people she imagined had never been in love. When she was sixteen, Anya’s father was killed in a car accident in Ukraine. At thirty-two, she became an orphan when her mother drank herself to death. As she was cleaning out her childhood home, she suddenly discovered a trove of old letters, photographs, and journals hidden in the debris of her mother’s life. These lost documents told a very different story than the one she’d believed to be true – of a forbidden romance; of a loving marriage, and the loss of a child. With these revelations in hand, Anya undertook an investigation, interviewing relatives and family friends, traveling to Wales and Ukraine, and delving deeply into her own difficult history in search of the truth, even uncovering the real circumstances of her father’s death – not an accident, perhaps, but something more sinister. In this inspiring and unflinchingly honest debut memoir, Anya interrogates her memories of her family and examines what it means to be our parents’ children. What do we inherit, and what can we choose to leave behind? How do we escape the ghosts of someone else’s past? And can we learn to love our parents not as our parents, but simply as people? Universal and personal; heartbreaking and redemptive, My Dead Parents helps us to see why sometimes those who love us best hurt us most.
A large segment of the population struggles with feelings of being detached from themselves and their loved ones. They feel flawed, and blame themselves. Running on Empty will help them realize that they're suffering not because of something that happened to them in childhood, but because of something that didn't happen. It's the white space in their family picture, the background rather than the foreground. This will be the first self-help book to bring this invisible force to light, educate people about it, and teach them how to overcome it.
Help and Hope for the Hard Road Ahead If you are currently providing care for your aging parents or facing the prospect of doing so in the near future, you are definitely not alone. Dr. Grant Ethridge and his wife, Tammy, have been there, having given care during their dads’ last days. They know the stress and uncertainty you face. Through their story and those of other caregivers, Grant and Tammy share research and practical tips to aid you in dealing with everyday caregiving struggles and situations. You will learn how to decide which care is best, prepare legal documents, handle family disputes, and much more. They will also share encouragement and advice from the Bible. You’ll discover that with God’s help, you can make it through even the most difficult days in your journey. Looking after an elderly or sick parent is a physically and emotionally draining experience. Let this book give you the tools you need to be successful without giving away your peace of mind in the process. And remember, as you give care to your parents, your Heavenly Father is always caring for you.
In Time to Parent, the bestselling organizational guru takes on the ultimate time-management challenge—parenting, from toddlers to teens—with concrete ways to structure and spend true quality time with your kids. Would you ever take a job without a job description, let alone one that requires a lifetime contract? Parents do this every day, and yet there is no instruction manual that offers achievable methods for containing and organizing the seemingly endless job of parenting. Finding a healthy balance between raising a human and being a human often feels impossible, but Julie Morgenstern shows you how to harness your own strengths and weaknesses to make the job your own. This revolutionary roadmap includes: A unique framework with eight quadrants that separates parenting responsibilities into actionable, manageable tasks—for the whole bumpy ride from cradle to college. Simple strategies to stay truly present and focused, whether you’re playing with your kids, enjoying a meal with your significant other, or getting ahead on that big proposal for work. Clever tips to make the most of in-between time—Just 5-15 minutes of your undivided attention has a huge impact on kids. Permission to take personal timewithout feeling guilty, and the science and case studies that show how important self-care is and how to make time for it.
"No one book resolves a lifetime of hurts and misunderstandings, but it can remove the blinders from our eyes. Make an effort now." LOS ANGELES TIMES No matter how old you are and whether or not your parents are alive, you have to come to terms with them. This wise and practical book will show you how to deal with the most fundamental relationships in your life and, in the process, become the happy, creative, and fulfilled person you are meant to be.
Three stepsiblings in a blended family discuss their experiences and those of friends with divorce and remarriage.