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A year-long journey by the renowned psychiatrist and his writer wife after her terminal diagnosis, as they reflect on how to love and live without regret. Internationally acclaimed psychiatrist and author Irvin Yalom devoted his career to counseling those suffering from anxiety and grief. But never had he faced the need to counsel himself until his wife, esteemed feminist author Marilyn Yalom, was diagnosed with cancer. In A Matter of Death and Life, Marilyn and Irv share how they took on profound new struggles: Marilyn to die a good death, Irv to live on without her. In alternating accounts of their last months together and Irv's first months alone, they offer us a rare window into facing mortality and coping with the loss of one's beloved. The Yaloms had numerous blessings—a loving family, a Palo Alto home under a magnificent valley oak, a large circle of friends, avid readers around the world, and a long, fulfilling marriage—but they faced death as we all do. With the wisdom of those who have thought deeply, and the familiar warmth of teenage sweethearts who've grown up together, they investigate universal questions of intimacy, love, and grief. Informed by two lifetimes of experience, A Matter of Death and Life is an openhearted offering to anyone seeking support, solace, and a meaningful life.
Feelings of love between patients and their therapists have been an endless source of confusion for those involved. An essential reading for all counselling and psychotherapy students and practitioners, this text offers fresh perspectives and advice on how best to deal with expressions of love and sexual desires in the course of therapy.
A revelatory book about death and mourning by a psychotherapist faced with sudden bereavement. When Juliet Rosenfeld's husband dies of lung cancer only seven months into their marriage, everything she has learnt about death as a psychotherapist is turned on its head. As she attempts to navigate her way through her own devastating experience of loss, Rosenfeld turns to her battered copy of Freud's seminal essay 'Mourning and Melancholia'. Inspired by the distinction Freud draws between the savage trauma of loss that occurs at the moment of death - grief - and the longer, unpredictable evolution of that loss into something that we call mourning, Rosenfeld finds herself dramatically rethinking the commonly held therapeutic idea of 'working through stages of grief.
Have you ever wondered what a therapist really thinks? Have you ever wondered if a therapist truly cares about her patients? Have you tried to imagine the unimaginable, the loss of the person most dear to you? Is it true that `tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all? ` Love and loss are a ubiquitous part of life, bringing the greatest joys and the greatest heartaches. In one way or another all relationships end. People leave, move on, die. Loss is an ever-present part of life. In Love and Loss, Linda B. Sherby illustrates that in order to grow and thrive, we must learn to mourn, to move beyond the person we have lost while taking that person with us in our minds. Love, unlike loss, is not inevitable but, she argues, no satisfying life can be lived without deeply meaningful relationships. The focus of Love and Loss is how patients' and therapists' independent experiences of love and loss, as well as the love and loss that they experience in the treatment room, intermingle and interact. There are always two people in the consulting room, both of whom are involved in their own respective lives, as well as the mutually responsive relationship that exists between them. Love and loss in the life of one of the parties affects the other, whether that affect takes place on a conscious or unconscious level. Love and Loss is unique in two respects.The first is its focus on the analyst's current life situation and how that necessarily affects both the patient and the treatment. The second is Sherby's willingness to share the personal memoir of her own loss which she has interwoven with extensive clinical material to clearly illustrate the effect the analyst's current life circumstance has on the treatment. Writing as both a psychoanalyst and a widow, Linda B. Sherby makes it possible for the reader to gain an inside view of the emotional experience of being an analyst, making this book of interest to a wide audience. Professionals from psychoanalysts and psychotherapists and bereavement specialists through students in all the mental health fields to the public in general, will resonate and learn from this heartfelt and straightforward book.
Bestselling writer and psychotherapist Irvin D. Yalom puts himself on the couch in a “candid, insightful” (Abraham Verghese) memoir​ Irvin D. Yalom has made a career of investigating the lives of others. In this profound memoir, he turns his writing and his therapeutic eye on himself. He opens his story with a nightmare: He is twelve, and is riding his bike past the home of an acne-scarred girl. Like every morning, he calls out, hoping to befriend her, "Hello Measles!" But in his dream, the girl's father makes Yalom understand that his daily greeting had hurt her. For Yalom, this was the birth of empathy; he would not forget the lesson. As Becoming Myself unfolds, we see the birth of the insightful thinker whose books have been a beacon to so many. This is not simply a man's life story, Yalom's reflections on his life and development are an invitation for us to reflect on the origins of our own selves and the meanings of our lives.
In this new volume, death is treated both as a threat to meaning and as an opportunity to create meaning.
Sigmund Freud noted the importance of love in the healing of the human psyche. So many of life's distresses have their origins in lack of love, disruption of love, or trauma. People naturally seek love in their lives to feel complete. Is therapy a substitute for love? Or is it love by another name? This important book looks at the place of love in therapy and whether it is the curative factor. The authors continually stress, however, that within psychotherapy both ethical and professional boundaries should govern this 'Love' at all times in order for it to be experienced as healing and therapeutic. This book offers explorations of the complexity of love from different modalities: psychoanalytic, humanistic, person-centred, psychosexual, family and systemic, transpersonal, existential, and transcultural. The discussions challenge therapists and other allied professionals to think about their practice, ethics, and boundaries.
From the bestselling author of Love's Executioner and When Nietzsche Wept comes a provocative exploration of the unusual relationships three therapists form with their patients. Seymour is a therapist of the old school who blurs the boundary of sexual propriety with one of his clients. Marshal, who is haunted by his own obsessive-compulsive behaviors, is troubled by the role money plays in his dealings with his patients. Finally, there is Ernest Lash. Driven by his sincere desire to help and his faith in psychoanalysis, he invents a radically new approach to therapy -- a totally open and honest relationship with a patient that threatens to have devastating results. Exposing the many lies that are told on and off the psychoanalyst's couch, Lying on the Couch gives readers a tantalizing, almost illicit, glimpse at what their therapists might really be thinking during their sessions. Fascinating, engrossing and relentlessly intelligent, it ultimately moves readers with a denouement of surprising humanity and redemptive faith.
Half in Love With Death presents a new way for therapists to manage chronically suicidal patients, an incredibly challenging task for clinicians and one where an insufficient amount of literature exists to guide professionals. Author Joel Paris suggests an approach that defies conventional wisdoms about whether suicide can be predicted or prevented. He asserts that managing chronically suicidal patients begins with tolerating suicidality, understanding the inner world of patients, avoiding repeated hospitalizations, and focusing on life situations that maintain suicidal ideas and behaviors. Each chapter in the book develops a theoretical perspective based on empirical data, and many are illustrated by clinical examples. Topics addressed throughout the text include: *distinctions among various types of suicidality; *the inner world of the chronically suicidal patient, with a particular focus on pain, emptiness, and hopelessness; *the relationship between chronic suicidality and personality disorders, especially the category of borderline personality; *the effectiveness of psychotherapy and pharmacotherapy for chronically suicidal patients; and *the risks of litigation in managing this patient population. This volume is a crucially important resource for clinicians who treat chronically suicidal patients, as it fills a gap in existing literature and provides enlightened guidelines that stem from a large body of research in the field.
The Dying Patient in Psychotherapy is a powerful account of love and death within a psychotherapeutic relationship. The narrative traces one man’s journey in psychotherapy and that of the analyst who accompanies him. The full-length description of an analysis demonstrates the developmental path of an erotic transference from its origins in infancy, through fantasies of sex and violence to mature erotic intimacy. The countertransference is considered with exceptional honesty as the analysis intensifies following the diagnosis of a life-threatening illness. A series of dreams rich in symbolic imagery traces the psychological situation as death approaches. A precursor to Schaverien’s acclaimed book Boarding School Syndrome, the single case study demonstrates the enduring impact of early boarding. This second edition also includes an updated literature review, and new material regarding training and supervision, making it a valuable resource for training institutions. The Dying Patient in Psychotherapy will be essential reading for psychoanalysts, psychotherapists, counsellors, arts therapists and all professionals working with the dying. The poignant story will also engage the general reader, curious about the process of psychotherapy.