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Lessons in Aging and Dying: A Poetic Autoethnography captures the experience of being elderly and facing the end of life. The book presents a collection of poems about life’s end accompanied with narrative commentary. Organized as 73 lessons, they can be read as personal curiosities, momentary realizations, farcical departures, embarrassing fears, therapeutic encounters, experiential truths, hopeful conjectures, and inevitable destinations. This book is a poetic inquiry that calls upon the lyrical in narrative and poetic forms to enter its subject. It also is an autoethnography that examines culture through the deployment of the self. Framed by introductory and concluding remarks, the book is organized around three developmental stages. The initial pages, "Beginnings," recognize the author’s birth into the end, a time when he knew he had arrived at a place beyond middle age. The middle unit, "From Here to There," displays an unsettled settling in, driven by an ongoing tension between resistance and acquiescence. It serves as a transitional stage into "Endings," the final section that anticipates death’s imminent arrival and speculates about how author might meet his end. Together, these units provide opportunities for identification, speculation, and resistance. Published as part of the prestigious autoethnographic series Writing Lives: Ethnographic and Autoethnographic Narratives, and written by one of the foremost academics in the fields of communication and performance studies, this text is particularly suitable for students and researchers in subjects such as relational and family communication, gerontology and end-of-life care, and performance studies.
A guide to living life in the moment uses lessons learned from the dying to help the living find the most enjoyment and happiness.
For fans of David Sedaris and Nora Ephron, a humorous, irreverent, and poignant look at the gifts, stereotypes, and inevitable challenges of aging, based on award-winning journalist Steven Petrow's wildly popular New York Times essay, "Things I'll Do Differently When I Get Old." Soon after his 50th birthday, Petrow began assembling a list of “things I won’t do when I get old”—mostly a catalog of all the things he thought his then 70-something year old parents were doing wrong. That list, which included “You won’t have to shout at me that I’m deaf,” and “I won’t blame the family dog for my incontinence,” became the basis of this rousing collection of do’s and don’ts, wills and won’ts that is equal parts hilarious, honest, and practical. The fact is, we don’t want to age the way previous generations did. “Old people” hoard. They bore relatives—and strangers alike—with tales of their aches and pains. They insist on driving long after they’ve become a danger to others (and themselves). They eat dinner at 4pm. They swear they don’t need a cane or walker (and guess what happens next). They never, ever apologize. But there is another way... In Stupid Things I Won’t Do When I Get Old, Petrow candidly addresses the fears, frustrations, and stereotypes that accompany aging. He offers a blueprint for the new old age, and an understanding that aging and illness are not the same. As he writes, “I meant the list to serve as a pointed reminder—to me—to make different choices when I eventually cross the threshold to ‘old.’” Getting older is a privilege. This essential guide reveals how to do it with grace, wisdom, humor, and hope. And without hoarding. Praise for Stupid Things I Won't Do When I Get Old: “Unbelievably witty and relatable, I alternated bursting into laughter and placing my hand over my face in horror thinking, Oh my God, is that me? I often say, at this age we have something young people can never have…wisdom. My dear friend, Steven Petrow, has wisdom to share in this honest, funny, wry guide to keep us young at heart, without desperately hanging onto our youth. I am buying this book for all of my friends!” —Suzanne Somers, New York Times bestselling author of A New Way to Age “Stupid Things I Won’t Do When I Get Old is an irreverent, funny, honest look at aging and all the things we take for granted as normal parts of aging. They don’t need to be. If you struggle with getting older and want to find a fresh perspective on lessons learned about what NOT to do as we age, and what TO do to stay young in heart, spirit, mind and body, read this book.” —Mark Hyman, MD, #1 New York Times bestseller author of The Blood Sugar Solution 10-Day Detox Diet, and Head of Strategy and Innovation at the Cleveland Clinic Center for Functional Medicine. “Steven Petrow resolved to do things differently than his parents had when he gets old because he wished they’d been able to enjoy life more. His solution? He created a list! In this book, he shares the secrets to living a full life regardless of our age. It's all about the decisions we make every day. My advice in a nutshell: Read this book and keep it handy.” —“Dear Abby” (Jeanne Phillips), nationally syndicated advice columnist “It’s never too early to imagine what your life will look like as you age. And as I once wrote, ‘We are not hostages to our fate.’ Petrow’s book will help you plan, think, and redefine what it means to get older—and even laugh while doing it.” —Andrew Weil, MD, New York Times bestselling author of Spontaneous Healing and Healthy Aging: A Lifelong Guide to Your Well-Being “Steven Petrow not only has a great attitude about life, he is wise about how to live it. Like me, he says we should embrace our one life 100% and not let a number—our age—get in the way of anything! Steven’s book will help you rethink the word “aging” and approach this next chapter with a positive and proactive attitude. Plus, this book is fun!” —Denise Austin, renowned fitness expert, author, and columnist “Steven’s writing feels like sitting with a friend—one who is unusually gracious, warm and frank.” —Carolyn Hax, author of the nationally syndicated advice column, Carolyn Hax Praise for Steven Petrow: "Steven Petrow's Complete Gay & Lesbian Manners helps gays and straights navigate the subtleties of the same-sex world." —People "Move over, Emily Post! When it comes to etiquette for members of the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community—as well as their straight friends, family members and coworkers--author and journalist Steven Petrow is the authority." —TIME "What could've easily become a novelty book has emerged as an exhaustively researched, essential resource thanks to advice columnist and etiquette expert Steven Petrow." —The Advocate "From having kids to planning funerals, Steven Petrow's Complete Gay & Lesbian Manners has most facets of gay life covered. Ms. Post would approve." —Entertainment Weekly "An indispensable refresher course...on what's proper in modern...life." —Kirkus Reviews
“Heartfelt and ever-endearing—equal parts information and inspiration. This is a book to keep by your bedside and return to often.”—Amy Dickinson, nationally syndicated advice columnist "Ask Amy" More than one thousand extraordinary Americans share their stories and the wisdom they have gained on living, loving, and finding happiness. After a chance encounter with an extraordinary ninety-year-old woman, renowned gerontologist Karl Pillemer began to wonder what older people know about life that the rest of us don't. His quest led him to interview more than one thousand Americans over the age of sixty-five to seek their counsel on all the big issues: children, marriage, money, career, aging. Their moving stories and uncompromisingly honest answers often surprised him. And he found that he consistently heard advice that pointed to these thirty lessons for living. Here he weaves their personal recollections of difficulties overcome and lives well lived into a timeless book filled with the hard-won advice these older Americans wish someone had given them when they were young. Like This I Believe, StoryCorps's Listening Is an Act of Love, and Tuesdays with Morrie, 30 Lessons for Living is a book to keep and to give. Offering clear advice toward a more fulfilling life, it is as useful as it is inspiring.
An inspirational gathering of thoughts on living a good old age into death, selected by the coauthor of the bestselling LIVING THE GOOD LIFE. With her husband, Scott--who lived to be 100--Helen Nearing (1904-1995) was a leading voice in the self-sufficiency movement and nonconformist thinking. Here she reflects, through the wise words of others, on the meaning of a long life and the wonder of what lies beyond.
In his landmark book How We Die, Sherwin B. Nuland profoundly altered our perception of the end of life. Now in The Art of Aging, Dr. Nuland steps back to explore the impact of aging on our minds and bodies, strivings and relationships. Melding a scientist’s passion for truth with a humanist’s understanding of the heart and soul, Nuland has created a wise, frank, and inspiring book about the ultimate stage of life’s journey. The onset of aging can be so gradual that we are often surprised to find that one day it is fully upon us. The changes to the senses, appearance, reflexes, physical endurance, and sexual appetites are undeniable–and rarely welcome–and yet, as Nuland shows, getting older has its surprising blessings. Age concentrates not only the mind, but the body’s energies, leading many to new sources of creativity, perception, and spiritual intensity. Growing old, Nuland teaches us, is not a disease but an art–and for those who practice it well, it can bring extraordinary rewards. “I’m taking the journey even while I describe it,” writes Nuland, now in his mid-seventies and a veteran of nearly four decades of medical practice. Drawing on his own life and work, as well as the lives of friends both famous and not, Nuland portrays the astonishing variability of the aging experience. Faith and inner strength, the deepening of personal relationships, the realization that career does not define identity, the acceptance that some goals will remain unaccomplished–these are among the secrets of those who age well. Will scientists one day fulfill the dream of eternal youth? Nuland examines the latest research into extending life and the scientists who are pursuing it. But ultimately, what compels him most is what happens to the mind and spirit as life reaches its culminating decades. Reflecting the wisdom of a long lifetime, The Art of Aging is a work of luminous insight, unflinching candor, and profound compassion.
What happens to us as we die? Discover the answers in this exclusive 25th anniversary edition of Sherwin B Nuland’s seminal book With a foreword by Paul Kalanithi, bestselling author of When Breath Becomes Air. There are many books intended to help people deal with the trauma of bereavement, but few which explore the reality of death itself. Sherwin B. Nuland - with over thirty years' experience as a surgeon - explains in detail the processes which take place in the body and strips away many illusions about death. The result is a unique and compelling book, addressing the one final fact that all of us must confront. 'I don't know of any writer or scientist who has shown us the face of death as clearly, honestly and compassionately as Sherwin Nuland does here' James Gleick, author of Chaos
How do we find beauty and meaning in old age? How do we overturn the paradigm of ageism? How do we age consciously and cultivate an inner life resilient enough to withstand the vicissitudes of old age? An extended meditation on how to age consciously and embrace life in all its fullness and wonder, Aging with Wisdom answers these questions.
More than thirty years ago, an entire generation sought a new way of life, looking for fulfillment and meaning in a way no one had before. Leaving his teaching job at Harvard, Ram Dass embodied the role of spiritual seeker, showing others how to find peace within themselves in one of the greatest spiritual classics of the twentieth century, the two-million-copy bestseller Be Here Now. As many of that generation enter the autumn of their years, the big questions of peace and of purpose have returned demanding answers. And once again, Ram Dass blazes a new trail, inviting all to join him on the next stage of the journey.
As we live longer and die slower and differently than our ancestors, we have come to rely more and more on end-of-life caregivers. These workers navigate a changing landscape of old age and death that many of us have little preparation to encounter. How We Die Now is an absorbing and sensitive investigation of end-of-life issues from the perspectives of patients, relatives, medical professionals, and support staff. Karla Erickson immersed herself in the daily life of workers and elders in a Midwestern community for over two years to explore important questions around the theme of “how we die now.” She moves readers through and beyond the many fears that attend the social condition of old age and reveals the pleasures of living longer and the costs of slower, sometimes senseless ways of dying. For all of us who are grappling with the “elder boom,” How We Die Now offers new ways of thinking about our longer lives.