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Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life is a no-nonsense self-help guide for anyone who has ever been cheated on. Here's advice not based on saving your relationship after infidelity -- but saving your sanity. When it comes to cheating, a lot of the attention is focused on cheaters -- their unmet needs or their challenges with monogamy. But Tracy Schorn (aka Chump Lady) lampoons such blameshifting and puts the focus squarely on the-cheated-upon (chumps) and their needs. Combining solid advice that champions self-respect, along with hilarious cartoons satirizing the pomposity of cheaters, Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life offers a fresh voice for chumps who want (and need) a new message about infidelity. This book will offer advice on Stupid sh*t cheaters say and how to respond, Rookie mistakes of the recently chumped and how to disarm your fears, Why chumps take the blame and how to protect yourself, and more. Full of snark, sass, and real wisdom about how to bounce back after the gut blow of betrayal, Schorn is the friend who guides you through this nightmare and gives you hope for a better life ahead.
Cheated on…Battered by emotion…You don't know where to turn. You feel betrayed, devastated, embarrassed, angry, and completely heartbroken. You ask yourself, "How can I stop infidelity from ruining my life?" "How do I cope with this nightmare? You don't realize there is a roadmap that explains what you are going through. That roadmap is Cheating in a Nutshell. Knowledge is Power and Understanding is Liberating. Whatever shade of infidelity you're dealing with, it is powerfully painful – and the feelings that come with it are hardly ever simple. Understanding your pain will change your way of thinking almost immediately. This book is for you if: --You just learned your partner cheated on you --You have been staying with a cheating partner --You were betrayed in a past relationship and seek a deeper understanding of your feelings In Cheating in a Nutshell, Wayne and Tamara Mitchell explain the source of your pain. There is a way out of this darkness, and the first step is to understand the structure of this awful experience. "The focus is on the betrayed, not the cheater, and if you've been cheated on, I agree with other reviewers: This is the best book, the only one you need." – Reader Review It's never too late to understand why you feel as you do. Read Cheating in a Nutshell.
Have you been traumatized by infidelity? The phrase "broken heart" belies the real trauma behind the all-too-common occurrence of infidelity. Psychologist Dennis Ortman likens the psychological aftermath of sexual betrayal to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in its origin and symptoms, including anxiety, irritability, rage, emotional numbing, and flashbacks. Using PTSD treatment as a model, Dr. Ortman will show you, step by step, how to: • work through conflicting emotions • Understand yourself and your partner • Make important life decisions Dr. Ortman sees recovery as a spiritual journey and draws on the wisdom of diverse faiths, from Christianity to Buddhism. He also offers exercises to deepen recovery, such as guided meditations and journaling, and explores heart-wrenchingly familiar case studies of couples struggling with monogamy. By the end of this book, you will have completed the six stages of healing and emerged with a whole heart, a full spirit, and the freedom to love again.
Nationally known psychologist Ana Ledwin Nogales addresses the affects of parental infidelity on childhood development—and on these children's relationships as adults Many books explore the affects of marital infidelity on a marriage, but Parents Who Cheat is the first book to examine not only how this behavior contributes to the breakdown of a family structure but how it directly affects the children in that family. With compassion and piercing insight, Dr. Ana Ledwin Nogales explains how adultery damages a child's understanding of love, marriage, and trust. As these children grow toward adulthood, their ability to have healthy relationships is compromised. Through stories of children struggling to understand their parents' adultery, as well as case histories of adult children coping with unresolved issues related to parental infidelity, Dr. Nogales shows how destructive habits are formed and points the way toward healing and the creation of healthier relationships with parents and partners.
Reminiscent of Three Women and The State of Affairs—and based on years of research and in-depth interviews with more than sixty men—this eye-opening and explosive study explores why men cheat, how they do it, and the repercussions that infidelity has on every aspect of life. It is estimated that one in four married men cheat on their wives. Of those, roughly half claim that they are “very happy” in their marriages. So why risk ruining it all? Is it the sex? The affirmation? The danger? Yes, it’s all of that. But it’s also so much more. The author of this book has conducted a series of in-depth interviews with men and women of all ages and backgrounds who have cheated in the past or are currently cheating on their spouses. They talked openly and intimately about details of their affairs, and the emotions that they experience before, during, and after. The book breaks down the five major categories of cheaters, defines the typical cheater personality, and looks at how husbands can cheat while also loving their wives. It reveals the tips and tricks spouses use to get away with secret affairs and examines everything from the influence of cheating parents on their children to the possible outcomes once an affair is discovered. This unfiltered window into the hearts and minds of men explores the psychological roots of cheating and proposes a new vision of masculinity that is more emotionally aware and could significantly change relationships for the better.
Talking to your partner after they've cheated is undeniably one of the toughest conversations you'll ever have with them. You'll be bubbling over with a ton of emotions - anger, upset and frustration. The cheating partner will also have their own emotions to deal with - dread, uncertainty and the shame of their actions. The aftermath of cheating always leads to "The Conversation", where the hurt party asks their partner all of the questions about the affair they have bottled up. The cheater will be asked to answer difficult questions and confess some hurtful things to their partner, which is easier said than done. Does this situation sound similar to the one you've found yourself in? Although you may find yourself simmering with an abundance of questions for your partner, they don't always come out the way you want or need them to; your anger and hurt take over and what should be an open communication turns into an argument. I was in the same situation not too long ago, and my rage and hurt would always get in the way of an open and honest discussion with my partner about his infidelity. This stopped me from being able to get the closure I needed so badly. Couple this with my emotions clouding my ability to know what questions to ask and how to ask them, I was in a cycle of heartache and confusion. Through trial and error, I had the breakthrough with my partner and compiled my findings in this book. I've included four parts: Part One: Questions To Ask Your Partner To Understand Their Behaviour Part Two: Questions To Ask To Rebuild Trust With Your Partner Part Three: Questions To Ask A Cheating Partner Or Ex To Gain Closure Part Four: A Chapter For The Cheater: Understand Your Behaviour, Comprehend The Damage It's Caused & Nurture Forgiveness In Your Relationship This book is for you if you've been cheated on and need answers. It's also a way to find comfort in the knowledge that someone has been in the same position you're in and has been through the same heartache as you've endured. Straight to the point, no fluff or filler, this book will aid you in getting the answers you need, help you rebuild honest communication with your partner and inspire you to seek the respect you deserve.
Based on a study of over 400 women worldwide, Runaway Husbands: The Abandoned Wife's Guide to Recovery and Renewal, is the first book to explore and offer healing strategies to women whose lives have been turned upside down by Wife Abandonment Syndrome. This Revised and Updated edition expands on the groundbreaking first edition that led to the development of an amazing global community of women working together to recover from Wife Abandonment Syndrome - when a husband leaves out-of-the-blue from what his wife believed to be a happy, secure marriage. Following his sudden departure, he typically replaces the caring he'd previously shown her with blame and anger, leaving his bewildered wife totally devastated. The Revised and Updated edition includes new chapters that discuss the husband's possible Covert Narcissism, the effect of this kind of divorce on the father/adult child relationship and the challenges of co-parenting with an ex following abandonment. Written by family therapist Vikki Stark, MSW, who herself had a runaway husband, the book helps women understand in full what could motivate a loving husband to morph overnight into an uncaring stranger and provides them with the tools they need to move forward and rebuild their lives.
"A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity — but not necessarily the wisest one.” — LA Review of Books From iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity comes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it. An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book. For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart. Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations. Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”
A no-nonsense self-help guide for anyone who has ever been cheated on. Offering advice not based on saving your relationship after infidelity, but saving your sanity.