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In the tradition of Just Tricking!, Just Annoying!, Just Stupid! and Just Crazy!, Andy Griffiths has written nine highly original, humorous new stories about Andy G. Includes a terrible agonising death by flesh-eating zombies, a battle with brussel sprouts (the sprouts win) and the disgusting fact that cockroaches can live for nine days without their heads (they only die because they starve to death). Complemented by imaginative, chaotic and downright disgusting illustrations by Terry Denton.
Is this the right book for you? Take the ANNOYING TEST and find out. 1) Do you ask `Are we there yet?' over and over on long car trips? 2) Do you like to drive people mad by copying everything they say and do? 3) Do you hog the shower and use up all the hot water? 4) Do you enjoy asking silly questions that have no real answers? 5) Do you swing on the clothesline whenever you get the chance? SCORE: One point for each 'yes' answer. 3-5 You are obviously a very annoying person. You will love this book. 1-2 You are a fairly annoying person. You will love this book. 0 You don't realise how much fun being annoying can be. You will love this book.
A young boy embarks on an epic journey across the land to reclaim his runaway butt in this hilarious beginning to a bestselling trilogy. Zack Freeman is ready to tell his story . . . the story of a brave young boy and his crazy runaway butt. The story of a crack butt-fighting unit called the B-team, a legendary Butt Hunter’s formidable daughter, and some of the ugliest and meanest butts ever to roam the face of the Earth. A story of endurance that takes Zack on an epic journey across the Great Windy Desert, through the Brown Forest, and over the Sea of Butts before descending into the heart of an explosive buttcano to confront the biggest, ugliest, and meanest butt of them all! Praise for The Day My Butt Went Psycho “Griffith’s fun gross-out adventure novel follows Zack Freeman, who awakens to see his rear end leaping out the window to lead a bum rally . . . Young readers will likely get a kick out of it all (there’s even a glossary included).” —Publishers Weekly
Do you bounce so high on your bed that you hit your head on the ceiling? Do you ever look in the mirror and see a crazy maniac staring back at you? Nine highly original, humorous stories complemented by imaginative and hilarious illustrations from one of Australia's most well-known and acclaimed illustrators, Terry Denton.
The most famous and controversial novel from one of the greatest writers of the twentieth century tells the story of Humbert Humbert’s obsessive, devouring, and doomed passion for the nymphet Dolores Haze. "The conjunction of a sense of humor with a sense of horror [results in] satire of a very special kind." —The New Yorker Awe and exhilaration—along with heartbreak and mordant wit—abound in Lolita, which tells the story of the aging Humbert Humbert's obsession for the nymphet Dolores Haze. Lolita is also the story of a hypercivilized European colliding with the cheerful barbarism of postwar America. Most of all, it is a meditation on love—love as outrage and hallucination, madness and transformation.
In Your Disgusting Head, Dr. and Mr. Doris Haggis-on-Whey reveal—through newly discovered discoveries—all the ways in which your head disappoints you. For many years the scientific and educational community has wondered and worried about the possibility that semi-sane scholar-pretenders would find the means to put out a series of reference books, filled with ludicrous misinformation and aimed at children. Well, we offer you Your Disgusting Head by Dr. and Mr. Doris Haggis-On-Whey. A world-renowned and much feared expert on everything, Dr. Doris Haggis-On-Whey has seventeen degrees from eighteen institutions of higher learning. With her husband, Benny, she has traveled the world many times over, has learned about all aspects of life, including outer space and food, first hand. The human body is beautiful and mysterious. The mysterious part reeks of cheese. But no part of your body is as scary and horrifying as your head! In Your Disgusting Head, you’ll find amazing information, such as: · The ear was invented and designed by Feranando de la Mancini Goldfarb, in 1911, which was also a good year for yeast. · Good Reasons for teeth removal: dentist did it; peer pressure; not sharp enough; found better teeth, like, on the ground; suspected of enjoying flossing; decay and mouth politics. · The real reason your ears can't hear your pets talking. The answer is simple: your pet is a mumbler." With the wit and irreverent sense of humor for which Dave Eggers and McSweeney's is known, comes the second volume in the revolutionary Haggis-On-Whey World of Unbelievable Brilliance books. More than just entertaining and informative, Your Disgusting Head will help you appear smarter, more in touch with your sensitive side and whiten your teeth. And much, much more that will likely sicken you.
Another JUST outrageous title from the author of the NY Times bestseller THE DAY MY BUTT WENT PSYCHO! The series that made Andy Griffiths an Australian publishing phenomenon is sweeping America! Before introducing the world to butts gone bad, Andy Griffiths unleashed the bestselling JUST books. The series continues to amuse, annoy, and totally ick out readers with this latest collection of just disgusting stories.Join Andy in his quest to gross out everyone around him with dead fish, mysterious brown blobs, flesh-eating zombies, and brussel sprouts. Each madcap adventure is more disgusting and hilarious than the last. You'll laugh so hard you'll lose your lunch!
Full of highly original, and extremely funny stories, which established Andy Griffiths as the world's most annoying person. They include convincing his best friend Danny that he is invisible so that he will wreak havoc in the school library, and pretending that corn relish is vomit to make an old lady move seats on a plane.
Hyena is a collection of autobiographical stories by Jude Angelini, which takes the reader on his journey of heartbreak, depravity, and hilarity, deftly moving between his adult life and his childhood growing up in a factory town outside of Detroit. Each story is told with brutal honesty, yet maintains a gallows humor that will leave you shaking your head in disbelief. Jude is one of the top hip-hop radio hosts on Sirius Satellite radio. His self-published, print-on-demand edition of Hyena has been an indie bestseller, despite having no ebook or physical distribution. Its exploration of drugs, sex, and the human condition compares to Charles Bukowski, Hunter S. Thompson, Artie Lange, and Jim Norton. It also captures the hardscrabble culture, language, and landscape of post-industrial Detroit, from which came some of pop culture's most compelling artists.
Gasp as Andy careers down a hill in an abandoned pram wearing only a nappy! Groan as he desperately looks for a toilet in a shopping centre before he explodes! Squirm as he shoves twenty marshmallows in his mouth without swallowing! But most of all, laugh! Because Andy Griffiths is back with nine hysterically stupid tales.