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As a philosopher of intimacy, he stresses the importance of intimate relations and private sentiments in building community bonds.
The Enneagram is a profound tool for self-observation and inner work. While there are plenty of resources on the topic, most Enneagram literature is largely limited to entry-level descriptions of the Nine Types. The Instinctual Drives and the Enneagram focuses on a crucial but misunderstood facet of the Enneagram Typology--our "animal" Instinctual Drives and how they are related to our spiritual nature. While nearly every school of thought on the Enneagram acknowledges the importance and role of the Instinctual Drives, there's a deep lack of understanding what they actually are, the role they play in personality, and most importantly, their implications for inner work. This book achieves, for the first time, a coherent theory of the instinctual drives based in biology, evolution, and developmental psychology, and it paves the way toward a more accurate view of inner work that directly addresses our animal nature. In so doing, it turns our current understanding of the Enneagram on its head by showing that the personality does not exist in parallel with our instinctual drives, but in reaction to them. In other words, instinct comes first - and one's Enneagram type is nothing more or less than a strategy to fulfill instinctual needs. This clarified orientation has important implications for our spiritual development, self-remembrance, and the transformation of our personhood into a conduit of Essence.
The Enneagram—a universal symbol of human purpose and possibility—is an excellent tool for doing the hardest part of consciousness work: realizing, owning, and accepting your strengths and weaknesses. In this comprehensive handbook, Beatrice Chestnut, PhD, traces the development of the personality as it relates to the nine types of the Enneagram, the three different subtype forms each type can take, and the path each of us can take toward liberation. With her guidance, readers will learn to observe themselves, face their fears and disowned Shadow aspects, and work to manifest their highest potential.
Understanding your approach to dating, relationships, and sex through the lens of your Enneagram personality type • Explains the relationship and sexual differences in the 9 Enneagram personality types for both genders • Examines how we can create greater intimacy with our partners and what blocks our sexual enjoyment • Looks at each type’s fantasies and investigates how our behavior in relationships alters according to how emotionally integrated or disintegrated we are • Explores the three types of love and their countertypes; each type’s Enneagram Passions and Virtues in relation to intimacy; how to engage with each type; and whether some types make better lovers Sex can take us from the sacred sublime to the darkest aspects of humanity. It can carry us on the wings of pure pleasure, or crush and potentially destroy us. No act in the human experience, barring the essential survival needs of food and water, can have more of an effect on us. In Sex and the Enneagram, Ann Gadd explores relationships and sex through the lens of the Enneagram, its nine personality types, and the subtypes of the wings and Instinctual Triads. The author introduces the Enneagram system and provides a full chapter devoted to each type. She examines each type’s approach to sex, their fantasies, and levels of integration in relation to love and sex, as well as each type’s approach to issues such as pornography, sexual problems, and dating sites and whether some types make better lovers. The author explains the Enneagram Passions and Virtues of each type in relation to sex, divorce, wing influences, and gender and explains how the 27 Sub or Instinctual types and the Hornevian Triads of the Enneagram system affect our sexuality. Most importantly, Gadd looks at how we can heal ourselves sexually so we can create more fulfilling, transforming intimacy for ourselves and our partners. Through understanding ourselves and our partners sexually, with the help of the Enneagram, Gadd hopes to bring us to deeper levels of compassion and understanding for each other. Sex then can be an expression enhancing our love for each other, rather than simply a physical act. By understanding your own and your lover’s Enneagram type, intimate giving and receiving can be an empowering process to embody our love for ourselves and others.
When seventeen-year-old Lane becomes involved in the search for a serial killer active in the Washington, D.C. area, she worries that her life-long fascination with such murderers has a very real and terrible cause.
In this highly informative and entertaining book, the founder of the vibrant new field of evolutionary consumption illuminates the relevance of our biological heritage to our daily lives as consumers. While culture is important, the author shows that innate evolutionary forces deeply influence the foods we eat, the gifts we offer, the cosmetics and clothing styles we choose to make ourselves more attractive to potential mates, and even the cultural products that stimulate our imaginations (such as art, music, and religion). The book demonstrates that most acts of consumption can be mapped onto four key Darwinian drives—namely, survival (we prefer foods high in calories); reproduction (we use products as sexual signals); kin selection (we naturally exchange gifts with family members); and reciprocal altruism (we enjoy offering gifts to close friends). The author further highlights the analogous behaviors that exist between human consumers and a wide range of animals. For anyone interested in the biological basis of human behavior or simply in what makes consumers tick—marketing professionals, advertisers, psychology mavens, and consumers themselves—this is a fascinating read.
Whether you’re newly together and eager to make it work or a longtime couple looking to strengthen and deepen your bond, Eight Dates offers a program of how, why, and when to have eight basic conversations with your partner that can result in a lifetime of love. “Happily ever after” is not by chance, it’s by choice– the choice each person in a relationship makes to remain open, remain curious, and, most of all, to keep talking to one another. From award-winning marriage researcher and bestselling author Dr. John Gottman and fellow researcher Julie Gottman, Eight Dates offers an ingenious and simple-to-implement approach to effective relationship communication. Here are the subjects that every serious couple should discuss: Trust. Family. Sex and intimacy. Dealing with conflict. Work and money. Dreams, and more. And here is how to talk about them—how to broach subjects that are difficult or embarrassing, how to be brave enough to say what you really feel. There are also suggestions for where and when to go on each date—book your favorite romantic restaurant for the Sex & Intimacy conversation (and maybe go to a yoga or dance class beforehand). There are questionnaires, innovative exercises, real-life case studies, and skills to master, including the Four Skills of Intimate Conversation and the Art of Listening. Because making love last is not about having a certain feeling—it’s about both of you being active and involved.
"A warm and expansive portrait of a woman’s mind that feels at once singular and universal," this collection of essays interweaves commentary on modern life, feminism, art, and sex with the author's own experiences of obsession, heartbreak, and vulnerability (BuzzFeed). Like a song that feels written just for you, Larissa Pham's debut work of nonfiction captures the imagination and refuses to let go. Pop Song is a book about love and about falling in love—with a place, or a painting, or a person—and the joy and terror inherent in the experience of that love. Plumbing the well of culture for clues and patterns about love and loss—from Agnes Martin's abstract paintings to James Turrell's transcendent light works, and Anne Carson's Eros the Bittersweet to Frank Ocean's Blonde—Pham writes of her youthful attempts to find meaning in travel, sex, drugs, and art, before sensing that she might need to turn her gaze upon herself. Pop Song is also a book about distances, near and far. As she travels from Taos, New Mexico, to Shanghai, China and beyond, Pham meditates on the miles we are willing to cover to get away from ourselves, or those who hurt us, and the impossible gaps that can exist between two people sharing a bed. Pop Song is a book about all the routes by which we might escape our own needs before finally finding a way home. There is heartache in these pages, but Pham's electric ways of seeing create a perfectly fractured portrait of modern intimacy that is triumphant in both its vulnerability and restlessness. "Each of the essays in this debut collection reads like a mini-memoir . . . in which the author reflects on her experiences of young love, trauma, and transcendence through discussions of art and music . . . with an intimacy that is at once tender and expansive." —New York magazine
It would be impossible for most of us to spend a day without coming into direct or indirect contact with dozens of people family, friends, people in the street, at the office, on television, in our fantasies and fears. Our relationships with others are the most changeable, infuriating, pleasurable and mystifying elements in our lives. Personality types, based on the ancient system of the Enneagram, will help you to enjoy more satisfying and fulfilling relationships in all areas of your life by introducing you to the nine basic personality types inherent in human nature. This knowledge will help you better understand how others think and why they behave as they do, as well as increasing your awareness of your own individual personality. Written by the leading world authority on the Enneagram, it offers a framework for understanding ourselves and those around us, as well as a wealth of practical insights for anyone interested in psychology, counselling, teaching, social work, journalism and personal management.