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Did you know the last fight you had with your spouse began long before you even met? Are you tired of falling into frustrating relational patterns in your marriage? Do you and your spouse fight about the same things again and again? Relationship experts Milan and Kay Yerkovich explain why the ways you and your spouse relate to each other go back to before you even met. Drawing on the powerful tool of attachment theory, Milan and Kay explore how your childhood created an “intimacy imprint” that affects your marriage today. Their stories and practical ideas help you: * identify your personal love style * understand how your early life impacts you and your spouse * break free from painful patterns that keep you stuck * find healing for the source of conflict, not just the symptoms * create the close, nourishing relationship you dream about Revised throughout with all-new material and additional visual diagrams, this expanded edition of How We Love will bring vibrant life to your marriage. Are you ready for a new journey of love? Note: The revised and expanded How We Love Workbook is available separately.
Unlock the secrets to a thriving marriage with this practical and insightful workbook for couples seeking to understand how they can heal and strengthen their relationship. What Determines How You Love? Each of us relates to our spouse based on how we experienced love as a child. In this expanded and enhanced companion workbook to How We Love, relationship experts Milan and Kay Yerkovich offer assessments and conversation starters to help you and your spouse identify your relational patterns and realize how they are affecting you now. Their solution-focused tools help you: • understand why your spouse relates to you the way he or she does • learn how to break free from the barriers that make you feel stuck • see the connection between your personal love style and your childhood • follow specific, clear goals to create a thriving marriage • ask and answer questions strategically with your spouse The Yerkoviches have helped thousands of couples around the world heal and renew their relationships. This eminently practical guide will take your marriage to the new level of intimacy you’ve always wanted.
One small change in how you love; one big change in your kids Having problems with your kids? What if you are the problem and you just can’t see it? How We Love Our Kids offers a unique approach, to help you as a parent transform your kids by making specific changes in how you love. It’s the only book specifically for parents that reveals the unseen forces that shape every interaction with your kids. • Identify which of the five love styles you have. • Discover the surprising dynamics that shape your parenting. • Get rid of your “buttons” so your kids can’t push them. • Create a close connection with your kids that will last a lifetime. • Learn the seven gifts every child needs. Based on years of research in the area of attachment and bonding, How We Love Our Kids shows parents how to overcome the predictable challenges that arise out of the five love styles and helps parents cultivate a secure, deep connection with a child of any age. Retool your reactions and refocus on how you love. Start today. Watch your kids flourish and thrive as they receive what was missing in your love. With four self-assessments and powerful application tools to use with children of all ages.
Practical Help for Building a Stronger, More Passionate Marriage Every adult bears an “imprint of intimacy”–an inner sense of how much emotional vulnerability they can risk based on childhood lessons about handling their feelings and needs. Those past experiences shape your behavior, beliefs, and expectations of all current relationships, especially marriage. This powerful companion guidebook–perfect for use on your own or in a group setting–will help you apply the principles from How We Love and break free of the harmful imprints of the past. Inside you’ll find practical, solution-focused tools for building a stronger, more passionate marriage, including… ·specific questions to help you and your spouse pinpoint barriers to intimacy ·an assessment tool for identifying your intimacy imprint ·strategic guidance in applying the principles for increasing intimacy ·effective techniques to kickstart the process of lasting change ·a plan for developing clear, personalized goals for your marriage relationship Let relationship experts Milan and Kay Yerkovich guide you through a process of discovery that has transformed countless relationships, taking your marriage to a whole new level of intimacy as you learn to change How We Love.
2020 Association of Catholic Publishers second place award in general interest In this volume, Br. John Mark Falkenhain, OSB, a Benedictine monk and clinical psychologist, provides a well-researched and thorough program for celibacy formation for men and women, adaptable to both religious and seminary settings. Attending to the theological and the psycho-sexual dimensions of what it means to pursue a life of chaste celibacy, Br. John Mark identifies and expands on four major content areas, including motives for chaste celibacy, theological aspects of celibate chastity, sexual identity, and skills for celibate living. Formation goals and benchmarks for discernment are discussed for each content area, and implications and suggestions for ongoing formation are offered.
“The most crucial relationship advice book since Men Are from Mars.”—Erin Meanley, Glamour.com A groundbreaking, interactive relationship tool that literally places in the hands of couples the power to transform chronically frustrating relationship dynamics. We've all been there. A conversation with a loved one escalates into conflict. Voices rise to a fever pitch and angry, accusative words fly through the air. At times like these, it seems impossible to find the magic words that will lead to healing. Enter Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love. A psychotherapist with decades of experience in counseling couples, Nancy Dreyfus hit upon the revolutionary practice outlined in this book during a couples-therapy session in which a wife’s unrelenting criticism of her husband was causing him to become emotionally withdrawn. In the midst of this, Dreyfus found herself scribbling on a scrap of paper, “Talk to me like I'm someone you love,” and gestured to the husband that he should hold it up. He did and within seconds the familiar power differential between the two shifted, and a gentler, more genuine connection emerged. Dreyfus was startled, then intrigued, and then motivated to create a tool that could help others. This book features more than one hundred of Dreyfus's "flash cards for real life," written statements that express what we wish we could communicate to the person we love, but either can't find the right words or the right tone in which to say it. The statements include: • Taking responsibility: "I realize I'm overreacting. Can you give me a minute to get sane again?" • Apologizing: "I know I've really hurt you. What can I do to help you trust me again?" • Loving: "You are precious, and I get that I haven't been treating you like you are." A one-of-a-kind, practical relationship tool, Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love will help couples to stop arguing and begin healing.
Learn how to focus your creative energy to make things—and make things happen. In this blend of memoir and hardworking handbook, creativity and craft maven Amy Tangerine shows how to find your flow, maintain a positive mindset, and cultivate a rich and fulfilling life by focusing on what truly matters and implementing small yet powerful changes. Chapters explore how to craft the soul, craft the right mindset, craft the right environment, craft good habits, rediscover your creative mojo, and maintain momentum, with each section offering exercises for taking your creative practice to the next level. For anyone who has felt disconnected from their creativity or has had trouble saving a space for their passions, Craft a Life You Love will teach you how to make time for creativity each and every day.
The second edition of this essential and newly updated workbook is intended for use with couples who want to enhance their emotional connection or overcome their relationship distress. It closely follows the course of EFT treatment and allows clinicians to easily integrate guided reading, reflection, and discussion into the therapeutic process. Incorporating new developments in EFT and decades of research in the field of attachment, Veronica Kallos-Lilly and Jennifer Fitzgerald include chapters that explore concepts such as attachment bonds, the three cycles of relationship distress, how to make sense of emotions, relationship hurts and more. The workbook follows the familiar and accessible format of the first edition, Read, Reflect, and Discuss, and weaves fresh, illustrative examples throughout, with updated content considering the impact of gender, culture, and sexual orientation on relationship dynamics. Added reflections on these topics and an expanded section on sexuality dispels constraining popular myths and frees partners up to express themselves more openly. This book is essential reading for partners looking for helpful steps to improve the quality of their romantic relationships as well as marriage and family therapists, couple therapists and clinicians training in EFT to use with their clients.
"Invaluable for so many partners looking to reconnect and grow closer together." —Gwyneth Paltrow, founder and CEO of goop "Stan Tatkin can be entirely followed into the towering infernos of our most painful relationship challenges." —Alanis Morissette, artist, activist, and wholeness advocate The complete “insider’s guide” to understanding your partner’s brain, sparking lasting connection, and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust—now with more than 170,000 copies sold. “What the heck is my partner thinking?” “Why do they always react like this?” “How can we get back that connection we had in the beginning?” If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, you aren’t alone, and it doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed. Every person is wired for love differently—with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people’s minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and routines, making it possible to neurologically prime the brain for greater love and connection and fewer conflicts. This go-to guide will show you how. Drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this highly anticipated second edition of Wired for Love presents cutting-edge research on how and why love lasts, and offers ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship. This fully revised and updated edition also includes new guidance on how to manage disagreements, as well as new exercises to help you create a sense of safety and security, establish healthy conflict ground rules, and deal with the threat of the third—any outside source which threatens the harmony in your relationship, including in-laws, alcohol, children, and affairs. You’ll find proven-effective strategies to help you strengthen your relationship by: Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening routines to stay connected Learning how to see your partner’s point of view Meeting each other halfway in a fight Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By using simple gestures and words, you’ll learn to put out emotional fires and help your partner feel appreciated and loved. You’ll also discover how to move past a “warring brain” mentality and toward a more cooperative “loving brain.” Most importantly, you’ll gain a better understanding of the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships. While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you understand how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences, and create a lasting intimate connection.
You hear and read a lot about ways to improve your relationship. But if you've tried these without much success, you're not alone. Many highly reactive couples—pairs that are quick to argue, anger, and blame—need more than just the run-of-the-mill relationship advice to solve their problems in love. When destructive emotions are at the heart of problems in your relationship, no amount of effective communication or intimacy building will fix what ails it. If you're part of a "high-conflict" couple, you need to get control of your emotions first, to stop making things worse, and only then work on building a better relationship. The High-Conflict Couple adapts the powerful techniques of dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) into skills you can use to tame out-of-control emotions that flare up in your relationship. Using mindfulness and distress tolerance techniques, you'll learn how to deescalate angry situations before they have a chance to explode into destructive fights. Other approaches will help you disclose your fears, longings, and other vulnerabilities to your partner and validate his or her experiences in return. You'll discover ways to manage problems with negotiation, not conflict, and to find true acceptance and closeness with the person you love the most. This book has been awarded The Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies Self-Help Seal of Merit — an award bestowed on outstanding self-help books that are consistent with cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) principles and that incorporate scientifically tested strategies for overcoming mental health difficulties. Used alone or in conjunction with therapy, our books offer powerful tools readers can use to jump-start changes in their lives.