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Today there are more than five million women and their children are living in a violentrelationship, and this number is increasing as new technology from tracking devices on cell phonesto computer technology allow an abuser to track its' victims every move. Domestic violence and stalking related crimes are being dismissed in a flurry of shuffled divorcedocuments and court orders of protection. You cannot plead with an abuser and walk away frompotentially life threatening situations if you are unable to learn the steps necessary to protect yourself. In this straight forward, clearly written guidebook, veteran violence safety expert Susan MurphyMilano provides victims the tools and support they require to face this debilitating problem andtake the necessary steps to regain control of their lives. Victims and those going through divorce now are able to provide information, in their own words, about the fears, dangers, experiences they have had at the hands of their abuser. Like our own individual fingerprints, no two crimes against a victim are the same. An abuser isclever like a fox and this book will teach you the techniques to be ten steps ahead before a threatagainst your life can be carried out against you or your children. With the Evidentiary Abuse affidavit provided in this book a victim will be able to provide legaldocumentation and answers, allegations and fears that arise when a person has disappeared whenthey announce the relationship is ending, gone missing or have been found dead. You will be ableto properly document and describe: -Threats made against your life or well being, -Incidents of past abuse that a victim had endured -Admissions of how a threat will be carried out against a victim once they announce they are leaving or filing for a divorce -Where evidence or weapons would or could be located -Portray visible injuries or marks -Determine how to begin and continue through the complex maze a victim faces with policeand prosecutors-How to leave a Perpetrator-How to collect evidence "on the fly" How to begin and continue on the road to safety using a virtual toolbox of techniques How family and friends can be crucial in this process Using the creative approaches developed in this ground breaking guide book by Susan Murphy-Milano will take the victims from the State of being controlled to the "State of being in control." Susan is the author of Defending Our Lives, Getting From Domestic Violence and Staying Safeand Moving Out Moving On when a Relationship Goes Wrong Workbook. "There is nothing like this out there. The reason this book is so valuable is that it's the first book to provide step-by step procedures and structure to protect everyone from dangerous and abusive relationships" -Rev. Jennifer Burns Lewis, Pastor
Break Free From Over-Functioning, Over-Delivering, People-Pleasing, and Ignoring Your Own Needs So You Can Finally Live the Life You Deserve! Most of us were never taught how to effectively express our preferences, desires or deal-breakers. Instead, we hide our feelings behind passive-aggressive behavior, deny our own truths, or push our emotions down until we get depressed or so frustrated that we explode, potentially destroying hard-won trust and relationships. The most successful and satisfied people on the planet have one thing in common: the ability to create and communicate clear, healthy boundaries. This ability is, hands down, the biggest game changer when it comes to creating a healthy, happy, self-determined life. In Boundary Boss, psychotherapist Terri Cole reveals a specific set of skills that can help you stop abandoning yourself for the sake of others (without guilt or drama) and get empowered to consciously take control of every aspect of your emotional, spiritual, physical, personal, and professional life. Since becoming a Boundary Boss is a process, Cole also offers actionable strategies, scripts, and techniques that can be used in the moment, whenever you need them. You will learn: • How to recognize when your boundaries have been violated and what to do next • How your unique “Boundary Blueprint” is unconsciously driving your boundary behaviors, and strategies to redesign it • Powerful boundary scripts so in the moment you will know what to say • How to manage “Boundary Destroyers”—including emotional manipulators, narcissists, and other toxic personalities • Where you fall on the spectrum of codependency and how to create healthy, balanced relationships This book is for women who are exhausted from over-giving, overdoing, and even over-feeling. If you’re getting it all done but at the expense of yourself, give yourself the gift of Boundary Boss.
The world-renowned therapist and author of the groundbreaking self-help classic, The Emotionally Abusive Relationship, delves into the most destructive and powerful weapon of the abuser: shame. And reveals its most powerful antidote... In The Emotionally Abused Woman, therapist Beverly Engel introduced the concept of emotional abuse, one of the most subtle, yet devastating forms of abuse within a relationship. Now Engel exposes the most destructive technique the abuser uses to break our spirit and gain control--and guides readers on how to free themselves from the shame that can keep them from the life (and the love) they deserve. Emotionally abused people are gradually stripped of self-esteem, dignity, and humanity--making them feel unworthy and utterly powerless to escape. But they possess a potent tool with which to combat shame: self-compassion. In these pages, Engel shows how to access it. Using her highly effective Shame Reduction Program, she helps readers jumpstart the process of recovery by offering specific steps to help heal, regain self-confidence--and ultimately become empowered enough to leave--for good. An invaluable resource for both men and women who suffer from emotional abuse, as well as therapists and advocates, Escaping Emotional Abuse is a supportive, nurturing guide for anyone seeking to break the chains of shame, and gain the emotional freedom to create healthier, lasting relationships.
This report presents findings from the National Violence Against Women (NVAW) Survey on the extent, nature, and consequences of intimate partner violence in the United States. The National Institute of Justice and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention cosponsored the survey through a grant to the Center for Policy Research. The survey consists of telephone interviews with a nationally representative sample of 8,000 U.S. women and 8,000 U.S. men about their experiences as victims of various forms of violence, including intimate partner violence. The survey compares intimate partner victimization rates among women and men, specific racial groups, Hispanics and non-Hispanics, and same-sex and opposite-sex cohabitants. It also examines risk factors associated with intimate partner violence, the rate of injury among rape and physical assault victims, injured victims' use of medical services, and victims' involvement with the justice system. Research on intimate partner violence has increased dramatically over the past 20 years. While greatly enhancing public awareness and understanding of this serious social problem, this research has also created much controversy and confusion. Findings of intimate partner victimization vary widely from study to study. Some studies conclude that women and men are equally likely to be victimized by their partners, but others conclude that women are more likely to be victimized. Some studies conclude that minorities and whites suffer equal rates of intimate partner violence, and others conclude that minorities suffer higher rates. In addition, there are many gaps in the scientific literature on intimate partner violence, such as the level of violence committed against men and women by same-sex intimates. Little empirical data exist on the relationship between different forms of intimate partner violence, such as emotional abuse and physical assault. Finally, little is known of the consequences of intimate partner violence, including rate of injury and victims' use of medical and justice system services. This Research Report addresses these and other issues related to intimate partner violence. The information presented in this report is based on findings from the National Violence Against Women (NVAW) Survey, a national telephone survey jointly sponsored by the National Institute of Justice (NIJ) and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). The survey, which was conducted from November 1995 to May 1996, consists of telephone interviews with a representative sample of 8,000 U.S. women and 8,000 U.S. men. Survey respondents were queried about their experiences as victims of various forms of violence, including rape, physical assault, and stalking by intimate partners. Victimized respondents were asked detailed questions about the characteristics and consequences of their victimization, including the extent and nature of any injuries they sustained, their use of medical services, and their involvement with the justice system. This Research Report also summarizes the survey's findings on victimization rates among women and men, specific racial groups, Hispanics and non-Hispanics, and opposite-sex and same-sex cohabitants. It examines risk factors associated with intimate partner violence, rates of injury among rape and physical assault victims, injured victims' use of medical services, and victims' involvement with the justice system. Although this report focuses on women's and men's experiences as victims of intimate partner violence, complete details about men's and women's experiences as victims of rape, physical assault, and stalking by all types of assailants are contained in earlier NIJ and CDC reports. Because of the sensitive nature of the survey, state-of-the-art techniques were used to protect the confidentiality of the information being sought and to minimize the potential for retraumatizing victims of violence and jeopardizing the safety of respondents.
Aims to help women recognize the signs of an abusive man, before he becomes violent and does irrevocable damage. Original.
"Engel doesn't just describe-she shows us the way out." -Susan Forward, author of Emotional Blackmail Praise for theemotionally abusive relationship "In this book, Beverly Engel clearly and with caring offersstep-by-step strategies to stop emotional abuse. . . helping bothvictims and abusers to identify the patterns of this painful andtraumatic type of abuse. This book is a guide both for individualsand for couples stuck in the tragic patterns of emotionalabuse." -Marti Loring, Ph.D., author of Emotional Abuse and coeditor of The Journal of Emotional Abuse "This groundbreaking book succeeds in helping people stop emotionalabuse by focusing on both the abuser and the abused and showingeach party what emotional abuse is, how it affects therelationship, and how to stop it. Its unique focus on the dynamicrelationship makes it more likely that each person will grasp thetools for change and really use them." -Randi Kreger, author of The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook and owner of BPDCentral.com The number of people who become involved with partners who abusethem emotionally and/or who are emotionally abusive themselves isphenomenal, and yet emotional abuse is the least understood form ofabuse. In this breakthrough book, Beverly Engel, one of the world'sleading experts on the subject, shows us what it is and what to doabout it. Whether you suspect you are being emotionally abused, fear that youmight be emotionally abusing your partner, or think that both youand your partner are emotionally abusing each other, this book isfor you. The Emotionally Abusive Relationship will tell you how toidentify emotional abuse and how to find the roots of yourbehavior. Combining dramatic personal stories with action steps toheal, Engel provides prescriptive strategies that will allow youand your partner to work together to stop bringing out the worst ineach other and stop the abuse. By teaching those who are being emotionally abused how to helpthemselves and those who are being emotionally abusive how to stopabusing, The Emotionally Abusive Relationship offers the expertguidance and support you need.
This book will tell you everything you need to know in order to overcome domestic violence and escape an abusive relationship. It will explain how to identify the characteristics of an abuser and how to recognize if you are in an abusive relationship.It will teach you how to plan in order to leave an abusive relationship and most importantly it will show you how to recover after leaving an abusive partner.
In this revealing book, you will meet courageous women who broke away from abusive relationships to escape the agonizing pain and find lasting peace. You, too, will recognize the signs of abuse, conquer timidity and helpless dependency, develop the strength to start over, heal your emotional and physical scars, defeat the fear of being alone, and enjoy healthy relationships. Physical battery is the number one cause of injuries among women—more than automobile accidents, rapes, and muggings combined. Are you one of the women who are being abused? You can escape the controlling power of your abuser.
Self Help.