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An unstoppable army of Xardanian lizard warriors, seething with vengeance and armed to the fangs with swords and axes, is poised to sweep across the Core Lands - and the ancient City of Port Packham is at the top of their list of places most likely to be pillaged. When Norris Bartlett, Galvanised Tubing salesman, finds himself accidentally transported into an alternative existence, he reluctantly becomes the last hope for the Port's inhabitants. Accompanied by a beautiful Sister of the Unexplained, an irritable wizard and the world's worst treasure hunter ('Tombs Raided While-U-Wait'), Norris has to travel across the bizarre, pear-shaped world of Pyrus in search of a legendary artefact that might save them all. The trouble is, it's been hidden by ancient priests and is guarded by an unspeakable horror. Norris discovers that he's even worse at preventing universal cataclysms than he ever was at selling Galvanised Tubing. So when things start to go pear-shaped, Norris needs all the help he can get.
The true story of Adam Blain, a 44-year-old London lawyer and family man who one day, ends up in A&E after a series of headaches and consistent nausea. Expecting to be sent home with a packet of Paracetamol, he's shocked when harassed doctors are suddenly offering to buy him gourmet coffee. Worse still, the diagnosis of a late-stage brain tumour is made by his oncologist wife. So far, so not funny. Adam, however, is determined not to slide into defeatist misery, and approaches the saga of surgery and chemotherapy with a chirpy, irreverent black humour. What else can he do when every outing risks bits of his brain dripping out of his nose without warning? Wondering constantly what the pear-shaped part of his brain that's been removed is thinking, and whether it's having a better time than he is, Adam takes us through the myriad but necessary indignities inflicted on the brain cancer sufferer. A test, for example, on whether he can he determine whether pictures of faces are smiling? Something his wife is more than happy to help him revise for... The 'revision' involves me sitting in a pub or restaurant with Lu who makes a variety of different facial expressions at me covering the full range of human emotions. It is just like being back at kindergarten... Lu hides behind the menu whilst deciding upon and practising the next expression. She then sticks her head over the top of the menu and I give it my best shot. It would be more dignified for me if she didn't shout "Peekaboo!" each time. Or regular appointments with a psychiatrist to determine whether he's a suicide risk? "I appreciate your lateral thinking to my problem. However, isn't suicide completely contrary to the point? I am scared of death and dying, I'm also undergoing horrendous treatments to (hopefully) delay my death. So why would I kill myself? What would be the point? That's been taken care of for me." The psychologist scribbled some stuff down and ticked a box. The box must have been: "No suicide risk", or "Suicide risk but in denial" or most likely... "Smart Arse". Even the bald patch left after the surgery, which resembles A pale pair of boxer shorts shaved into my head. Adam keeps himself going by looking for joy in everything - the radiation mask that resembles an S&M prop, or counting the amount of times he's greeted by a cotton bud being swabbed up his nose and then along the crease of a groin by a nurse to check for MRSA... While his wife encourages him to spend time with fellow cancer sufferers, with their spouses; diarrhea, constipation and catheters making for interesting dinner party conversation... "Let me introduce you to my good friend, Mike. Funny story how we met. Anyway, we get on so well because we are both dying of exactly the same disease. Ain't that right, Micky?" ... his old friends take him out on lads' weekends, their desire to show their mate a good time inhibited by middle-age, children and having, essentially, to babysit a grown man. Pear Shaped is a heartfelt, funny exploration of one man's real-life experiences as he undergoes treatment and simultaneously tries to seize the life he has left, all with the knowledge that a pear-shaped part of his brain is out there somewhere, fending for survival the same way he is.
Sharing wise guidance on how to navigate difficult times, this is a funny, warm and practical guide to help you gain perspective on what's truly important in life - from a young woman who never expected to survive The Big C. Perfect for fans of life-changing personal development manuals like The Resilience Project, The Happiness Project and When Life Is Not Peachy. 'This is the book everyone needs to read when life takes an unexpected turn.' - Mia Freedman, MamaMia Not all storms come to disrupt your life. Some come to clear your path. Viral video producer Briony Benjamin was a few months into a new job when she started feeling crappy… All. The. Time. Doctors told her she was just stressed and should rest more and learn to meditate. But it turns out she had cancer all through her body. Turning the camera on herself, Briony started documenting her journey in the short video 'You Only Get One Life'. Its raw portrayal of her experience went viral, touching millions. Here Briony shares some of the important lessons learnt through her illness and recovery - everything from how to assemble your A Team in times of crisis and learning to make friends with the pain, to happy hacks for cutting yourself some slack and some great tips on being a kick-arse support human when a friend is going through the rough stuff. If you want to live the richest version of your life, bring some more joy into your day-to-day existence and have some tools up your sleeve for when things get tricksy, this book is for you. Because - spoiler alert - we all have to deal with our fair share of tough times sooner or later. It's how we handle them and bounce back afterwards that really matters.
‘So many women will find this book speaks to them. It makes you laugh and cry but it is truly inspiring’ Katie Fforde ‘Sweet, sad, insightful and joyful – this book pressed all the emotion buttons and I’m so glad it did’ Milly Johnson ‘A beautiful, tender and joyful story.’ Susan Lewis
Now out in Paperback! How To Be Chic and Elegant was first published as an ebook in November 2011. The Kindle version fast became a cult classic and has not been out of the top rankings in its categories since February 2012. Marie-Anne Lecoeur, The French Chic Expert and French author of "Pear Shape", "Plus Size" and "The Tidy Closet", gives you over 200 simple tips in this book that will propel you to sidewalk model in no time at all. Here are just a few of the subjects covered: The principles of French elegance, The secrets of achieving a French Woman's Style, Over 200 TIPS to attain that Chic Look, Which clothes to avoid at all costs. Many women are crying out for the secrets of effortless French Chic. Here, in one small book, you have those secrets and more besides.This book is direct and straightforward, with no waffle or padding. Apply the tips right away, and literally see results in the mirror immediately. Save money on impulse purchases and learn to sharpen your style eye. Follow this French Author's simple instructions and start hearing the compliments roll in! Adopt the timeless style of Chic French women today.
The Big Sick meets Dad is Fat in this funny and heartfelt New York Times bestselling memoir from writer, director, wife, and mother, Jeannie Gaffigan, as she reflects on the life-changing impact of her battle with a pear-sized brain tumor. In 2017, Jeannie's life came to a crashing halt when she was diagnosed with a life-threatening brain tumor. As the mother of 5 kids -- 6 if you include her husband -- sat in the neurosurgery department in star-covered sweats too whimsical for the seriousness of the situation, all she could think was "Am I going to die?" Thankfully, Jeannie and her family were able to survive their time of crisis, and now she is sharing her deeply personal journey through this miraculous story: the challenging conversations she had with her children; how she came to terms with feeling powerless and ferociously crabby while bedridden and unable to eat for a month; and how she ultimately learned, re-learned and re re-learned to be more present in life. With sincerity and hilarity, Jeannie invites you into her heart (and brain) during this trying time, emphasizing the importance of family, faith and humor as keys to her recovery and leading a more fulfilling life.
A scholarly reference to slang expressions from all parts of the English-speaking world includes coverage of twenty-first-century terms and lists explanations of word origins.
In only five words -- four of which are in the title -- Kate Greenaway Medalist Emily Gravett presents a delightful picture book that is "simple and stunning" (The Guardian), and "daring, original, and a joy" (Sunday Times, London).
During the last several decades, the study of nuclear shapes has been of prime importance. A large number of investigations, both theoretical and experimental, have led to the discovery of a rich variety of nuclear shapes like, the basic spherical, deformed, superdeformed, triaxial, shape coexistence, reflection asymmetric (pear-shape) and other exotic ones. Apart from common nuclear structural properties, each of the mentioned shapes manifests properties associated with its specific form. It is interesting to note that most deformed nuclei are prolate deformed. In this monograph, attention is paid to pear-shaped nuclei.
With its unparalleled coverage of English slang of all types (from 18th-century cant to contemporary gay slang), and its uncluttered editorial apparatus, Cassell's Dictionary of Slang was warmly received when its first edition appeared in 1998. 'Brilliant.' said Mark Lawson on BBC2's The Late Review; 'This is a terrific piece of work - learned, entertaining, funny, stimulating' said Jonathan Meades in The Evening Standard.But now the world's best single-volume dictionary of English slang is about to get even better. Jonathon Green has spent the last seven years on a vast project: to research in depth the English slang vocabulary and to hunt down and record written instances of the use of as many slang words as possible. This has entailed trawling through more than 4000 books - plus song lyrics, TV and movie scripts, and many newspapers and magazines - for relevant material. The research has thrown up some fascinating results