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You don't just move here and immediately become a Texan; it takes training. This delightfully witty book takes you through the process of understanding our conversation, why and how we dress the way we do, why pickups are a fact of life, and how you can acquire the necessary big hair. Fixin' to Be Texan pokes gentle fun at the Texas mystique. Residents of the state will get a big kick out of Bryant's clever way of identifying our predominant characteristics. Newcomers will use it as a tool for understanding the wonderful and sometimes incomprehensible behavior of our fine native population.
Delightfully witty, this book takes readers through the gamut of facts about Texans, how to understand the conversations, why and how Texans dress the way they do, why pickup trucks are a way of life, and how they, too, can acquire big hair. Illustrated with clever cartoons. November '98 publication date.
There are certain things every Texan should know how to do and say, whether your Lone Star roots reach all the way back to the 1836 Republic or you were just transplanted here yesterday. Some of these may be second nature to you, but others . . . well, maybe it wouldn’t hurt to have a few handy hints if, say, branding the herd or hosting a tamalada aren’t your usual pastimes. That’s where How to Be a Texan can help. In a friendly, lighthearted style, Andrea Valdez offers illustrated, easy-to-follow steps for dozens of authentic Texas activities and sayings. In no time, you’ll be talking like a Texan and dressing the part; hunting, fishing, and ranching; cooking your favorite Texas dishes; and dancing cumbia and two-step. You’ll learn how to take a proper bluebonnet photo and build a Día de los Muertos altar, and you’ll have a bucket list of all the places Texans should visit in their lifetime. Not only will you know how to do all these things, you’ll finish the book with a whole new appreciation for what it means to be a Texan and even more pride in saying “I’m from Texas” anywhere you wander in the world.
"Hilarious guide to lone star lingo, from draw/te twang with innumerable regional turns of phrase. Issued by the fictional Texas twang preservation society."
A collection of Courtney's columns from the Texas Monthly, curing the curious, exorcizing bedevilment, and orienting the disoriented, advising "on such things as: Is it wrong to wear your football team's jersey to church? When out at a dancehall, do you need to stick with the one that brung ya? Is it real Tex-Mex if it's served with a side of black beans? Can one have too many Texas-themed tattoos?"--Amazon.com.
Presents a collection of fascinating remembrances of those who were there. Sometimes humorous and sometimes heart breaking, the experiences of the Texas War Veterans.
Tom Dodge is at his best when he talks about Texas. This collection of writings over the past decade includes his most poignant and provocative National Public Radio vignettes as well as longer pieces from newspapers and magazines. Here are the wry, sometimes ironic, observations on all things Texas his listeners are used to. His insights include a unique analysis of junkyards, railroads, bookstores, horned toads, sandy-land farms, and his grandmother's homemade grape jelly.
Some of the law officers who served the West during the last half of the nineteenth century drifted from one side of the law to the other and sold their talents to whichever side offered the most advantage. Others used their positions as cover for their criminal activities. The lawmen in this book were serious offenders against the laws they had at one time sworn to uphold. Their skills were honed in range wars and family feuds and polished along the cattle trails, in the saloons and banks, and on the trains of the West. Some of them did good work enforcing the law when that was their job. Others had equally successful careers on the other side of the law. More than one kicked out their lives at the end of ropes strung up by citizens who were outraged by their abuse of the trust that went along with the badge they wore. These are their stories.
In Texas "Yankee" is a loose term covering a lot of ground. If you're not a Texan or a southerner, you're a Yankee and therefore, to many Texans, suspect. There are many rites of passage to being a Yankee in Texas: the first time you spot a pickup with a gun rack; the first time you realize that a week is a long time to go without Mexican food; the first time you recognize a change in seasons; your first thunderstorm; your first honky-tonk. Culture Shock in Texas can be intense and is exacerbate by local rules of propriety that tell us to keep out mouths shut. But here in this book we are going to talk all about it with good old Yankee outspokenness. We'll clear the air, share experiences, orient newcomers, and have some good laughs.
In short, delightful essays, a professor of English explains the key features that make American speech so expressive and distinct. With chapters on ethnic dialects and dialects in the movies, the author reveals the resplendence of one of our nation's greatest natural resources--its endless and varied talk.