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Dave wakes up to find someone else sleeping in his bed! It is orange just like Dave. It is big just like Dave. But it isn't Dave! Who could it be? From the bestselling creators of Barry the Fish with Fingers and How to Babysit a Grandad, comes another hilarious tale that is guaranteed to make young connoisseurs of toilet humour very happy. 'I laughed so much I farted!' Edward, aged 6
Have you ever dreamed of an entire school reading your book? Would you like to double (or more!) your writing income? With advice and insights that are adaptable to getting your book in front of audiences ranging from middle grade to high school to college, and even to corporations, this book is for you!
The Book of Dave is Booker-shortlisted author Will Self's dazzling sixth novel What if a demented London cabbie called Dave Rudman wrote a book to his estranged son to give him some fatherly advice? What if that book was buried in Hampstead and hundreds of years later, when rising sea levels have put London underwater, spawned a religion? What if one man decided to question life according to Dave? And what if Dave had indeed made a mistake? Shuttling between the recent past and a far-off future where England is terribly altered, The Book of Dave is a strange and troubling mirror held up to our times: disturbing, satirizing and vilifying who and what we think we are. At once a meditation upon the nature of received religion, a love story, a caustic satire of contemporary urban life and a historical detective story set in the far future - this compulsive novel will be enjoyed by readers everywhere, including fans of Martin Amis and Anthony Burgess's A Clockwork Orange. 'Vivid, visceral and breathtakingly ambitious, this is Self's best yet' GQ 'Mindboggling ... darkly hilarious ... A fascinating book' Evening Standard Will Self is the author of nine novels including Cock and Bull; My Idea of Fun; Great Apes; How the Dead Live; Dorian, an Imitation; The Book of Dave; The Butt; Walking to Hollywood and Umbrella, which was shortlisted for the Man Booker Prize. He has written five collections of shorter fiction and three novellas: The Quantity Theory of Insanity; Grey Area; License to Hug; The Sweet Smell of Psychosis; Design Faults in the Volvo 760 Turbo; Tough, Tough Toys for Tough, Tough Boys; Dr. Mukti and Other Tales of Woe and Liver: A Fictional Organ with a Surface Anatomy of Four Lobes. Self has also compiled a number of nonfiction works, including The Undivided Self: Selected Stories; Junk Mail; Perfidious Man; Sore Sites; Feeding Frenzy; Psychogeography; Psycho Too and The Unbearable Lightness of Being a Prawn Cracker.
"Mr. Barry is the funniest man in America and we should encourage him." --The New York Times Book Review THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME--EXCEPT IN A SELLER'S MARKET At long last, Dave Barry, the dean of everything, lets you in on the deepest, darkest mysteries of life and answers your hysterical home purchase questions like they've never been answered before: What's the best way to determine a realistic price range? Take your total family income, including coins that have fallen behind the bureau, and any projected future revenue you have been notified about via personalized letters from Mr. Ed McMahon stating that you may already have won 14 million dollars. Then, multiply by something other than six. Can you recommend a good mortgage? There are several kinds: Fixed Rate, Variable Rate, and the bank's secret weapons, the Party Hat Mortgage and the Mortgage of the Living Dead. How can I avoid spending money on do-it-yourself homeowner's projects? Find a contractor. Their silent motto is "We Never Show Up." The Romans lived among the ruins. You must too. Is there a secret to having a beautiful lawn? Yes and no. If you fail to feed, fertilize, and water your lawn, it will die. However, if you feed, fertilize, and water your lawn, it will die.
Dave's gone missing! As his family and friends try to find him, he meets other dinosaurs who help him keep smart and safe as he deals with dangers like crossing the road. With touch and feel, die-cut pages!
Dave Thomas uses commonsense language and lively anecdotes to reveal the secrets behind his success, as he tells the story of his fascinating life from an adopted child to the head of the three-billion-dollar Wendy's empire. "Sound advice for any entrepreneur or business manager".--Chicago Tribune.
Oddrey, who is proud that she is different from other kids, is disappointed when she is not cast in a starring role in the school play. When the performance starts to go wrong, however, it is up to Oddrey and her creative mind to save the day.
The hilarious sequel to a modern classic. Written by Sue Hendra, the creator of the bestselling Barry the Fish with Fingers, and illustrated by Lee Wildish, the winner of the Overall Red House Children's Book Award 2013. Dave is a big ol' greedy guts. But oh no! His bowl is empty. The animals in the garden help him find other meals - but what will happen when he eats the dog's food? The answer will have you rolling around the floor with laughter. 'I laughed so much I farted!' Edward, aged 6
As Gotham City undergoes a massive architectural boom, a series of unexplained construction accidents begin to cause casualties across the city and it is up to Batman to discover who is behind the string of catastrophes.