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A holiday tradition turns deadly, but is the paranormal museum to blame? Maddie Kosloski is no fan of San Benedetto's Christmas Cow, a thirty-foot straw bovine that graces the town square every December. For one thing, the cow displaces her paranormal museum as the number one tourist attraction. Plus, every year, despite around-the-clock surveillance, the cow goes up in flames. But this year, there's more than just a fire blazing in Maddie's wine-country hometown. One of the Christmas Cow guards has been found with an arrow in his chest, and Maddie's new haunted cowbell exhibit is fueling a panic. Are the spirits in her museum getting too hot to handle? If Maddie and friends can't stop the hysteria—and a murderous archer—her holiday plans might not be the only thing full of holes. Get cozy with Deja Moo and start reading this laugh-out-loud mystery today! Praise for The Perfectly Proper Paranormal Museum Mysteries: "Well-drawn characters and tantalizing wine talk help balance the quirky aspects of this paranormal mystery."—Publishers Weekly "A delightful new series."—Library Journal (starred review)
“All anyone wants is to be read like a page-turner—opened, flipped through, enjoyed. People want to be connected with, used, loved, if only privately by an exclusive person or set of people. We want to be read like books because we write ourselves like books; narratives of character, theme, plot. And we read ourselves, too, what we’ve written in our minds.” “It’s scary,” says Ana; her brow coldly sweats. “Imagine it’s a dreamscape,” I say, squinching. “The trees are sleepwalkers. They sway and breathe. Their canopies are the umbragical skulls of scatterbrained giants.” —from Fools
‘ZEST’ equates to zing, enthusiasm, energy, gusto, eagerness, zeal and fervour. It also connotes a tang, a sharpness. It’s the opposite of bland. And Zest: How to Squeeze the Max out of Life is exactly that.It’s more than just a book on personal development. There are an awful lot of those. Zest is a catalyst, a spark that ignites your remembering of what makes you, in a word, you. It drives you to rethink, rejuvenate and reinvent. It also contains a touch of the revolutions. Have you, as a grown-up, fallen into the trap of becoming a Groan-up? You know you should try to make the best of things, but oftentimes you don’t know what your “best” is anymore. It’s strange. You used to know. What happened? Was it the years of social conformity? There is a whole beige generation out there – a generation that has lost its identity and forgotten who they once were – buried under the crushing, stifling facades of adulthood. If only there was a way to unearth your passions, recover the zest for life you once had. Maybe there is. Zest is a wake-up call for you to explore the formative moments that define your life. It challenges you to believe that your best days are still ahead, to search your soul, to shake things up and bask in the warmth of glorious individuality. Zest will help you: Explore the pivotal, defining moments in your life Examine both the good and bad experiences that define you Reconnect to the essence of who you are Embrace your quirks, qualities and peculiarities Determine to be the person you always wanted to be Zest is your permission to play, your licence to wreak the right kind of havoc. Moreover, it’s not about pretending to be someone you’re not, it’s about squeezing every last drop out of who you already are.
Tess has loved Adam for over ten years, but tonight, he's on his way to the altar with somebody else. Tess is left wondering how the situation got this far. When her friends throw a roast, they attempt to convince Tess she doesn't need Adam. With the help of strong friends and stronger drinks, she begins to believe she can move on from Adam. But drinks also reveal truths that could change her friends' minds about Adam and his true devotion. Was Adam tricked into marriage by a woman with fiancée-itis? Lamenting is fruitless and frustrating. Does Tess have one last chance to fight for the love of her life?
Do you feel like putting a bullet through your head every time your boss tells you to "quarterback this one for me, champ"? Do you find yourself resisting the urge to put a chokehold on colleagues who use the phrases "on the same page" or "no-brainer" or "going forward" in a sentence? Are you often tempted to tamper with the messages on the motivational signs HR posts around the office? Or to plant subliminal messages in the legal disclaimer that's attached to every e-mail you send? Well, then Officespeak is the book for you! This hilarious, tongue-in-cheek guide to deciphering and manipulating the language of the workplace includes such helpful hints as: The best (and worst) answers to the question, "What's your biggest weakness?" Sprucing up your job title and personalizing your business cards Being "swamped" and other key phrases for diverting responsibility Making up verbs to convey power, decisiveness, and initiative in the boardroom Mastering the fine art of interrupting with such foolproof expressions as "good point" and "borrriiinnnggg" AND MANY MORE! Just remember, there's no "I" in team... but there sure as hell is one in "You're hired!"
When Chuck and Dakota find a magic seashell complete with a wish-granting genie inside, their first wish is for a never-ending supply of chocolate-covered bananas. But when Dakota wishes to become a REAL cow so he doesn't have to wear his cowmouflage anymore, things get messy and the residents of Bermooda mistake him as an imposter! The boys soon discover that the magic seashell is having some fun with them by creating panic and havoc across the island. Can Chuck and Dakota work together to get everything back to normal before all the cows go mad?
Now that you hold this book in your hand, let me talk to you for a while, not that you are a dimwit, but I am sure you would have figured this out by now. This book does not have any purpose or meaning. Theres already a lot of crap flying around in the publishing world, so I just thought of adding some more, really. This book does not come from somebody highly accomplished or acclaimed; in fact, this book does not intend to cause that earth-shattering shift too toward any acclamation. ----- There is no foreword, middles, or epilogue to this book. There are no endorsements from highly acclaimed litterateurs. This book does not claim to be a bestseller and will never get to be one. This book does not address a social cause; it does not solve the carbon catastrophe that you see around you. This is not a self-help book, so no philosophy, no quantum physics, no next-generation robotics in here. And this book is definitely not from the wannabe stables of a Booker or a Pulitzer. ----- This book, at its worst, can go down the bookshelves as the World According to Me, with anecdotal references to growing up in middle-class urban India in the 70s and the 80s and carving out a life, meaningful in most ways, in the 90s and beyond as meaningful as the fast-changing environment that I saw in India and the world around me.
A Time to Heal Brody Mason needs a nurse. As soon as he can walk again, he'll leave Hope, Montana, and go straight back to the army. But Kaitlyn Harpe? That's adding insult to injury. Not just because she's a daily reminder that Brody's fiancée, Kate's sister, married his best friend while he was fighting in Afghanistan. But because Kaitlyn had kept the truth from him. The Kaitlyn he knew before he deployed would never have perpetuated a lie like that. But this new person—the confident, beautiful woman with hidden depths in her eyes—is nothing like the shy, serious girl he knew. This Kaitlyn troubles him. Because Brody is starting to wonder if he proposed to the wrong sister…
In creating the world’s premier law enforcement agency, J. Edgar Hoover built a gigantic bureaucratic machine resembling a slow-moving freight train, which was kept on his undeviating track by volumes of manuals containing rules and regulations beyond imagination. Each car of this lumbering snakelike apparatus had a function, but fastened loosely to the rear was a lonely straggling caboose known as the One-man Resident Agent. Hoover and his sycophants in the corner offices on Pennsylvania Avenue hated the concept of the one-man office and looked at them as necessary evils. They were needed to get the work done but hated as they were too far removed to be effectively micromanaged, and as they were out of sight, they were wrongly assumed to be screwing off. Hoover’s Nightmare: A Special Agent Gone Native is like no other book ever written from within the ranks of the FBI. Penned as a novel to allow the author flexibility, the reader is taken on an exciting, informative, dramatic, and often humorous journey through a part of US history that is, unfortunately, rapidly being swallowed up and lost down the memory hole of time. As the reader travels with the main character, Agent McWade, he will experience Indian wars, crazy kidnapping scenarios, Behavioral Science Unit experiences, unimaginable sex crimes, heart-wrenching tragedy, and a host of other unparalleled real-life cases. All this through the eyes of the agent who became Hoover’s nightmare. Read and enjoy the book that took the FBI well over a year to approve and allow to be published.
Things Church Girls Dont Talk About is a comical, yet poignant, story of a young church girl and her mother in search of true faith amidst a sea of toxic religion and eccentric Southern characters. Meet Mama Careen whose sass gets her into trouble when she announces her husbands adultery at his surprise birthday party. Enjoy the antics of her sister, Justine, who gets tipsy and does a tell off to her brother-in-law's bow-legged mistress at his funeral. Sympathize with Maggie as she tries to forgive and forget her cold, Irish father. Scoff at the narcissism of Jimmy Ray, a quirky preacher with a PH.Da Pentecostal Hair Do. If you have a bone to pick with religion, or even if you dont, you will be wooed by this charming and powerful tale of how mercy triumphs over judgment. Excerpts from THINGS CHURCH GIRLS DONT TALK ABOUT Maggie McBride on Southern sayings: and for your information, a Southern woman can say anything about anyone no matter how cutting or evil if she just follows it up with bless her heart, or something similar. Dont go repeating this, but Mrs. Johnsons loose daughters, Babs and Lola, became Porn whoresbless their hearts. Violets thighs looked like a tub full of cottage cheese in that bathing suitbless her heart. Mrs. Murphys lusty cousins, Beebe and Hortence, are both living in sinbless their hearts. I think you get the point. ********** Careen McBride and her unique, attention seeking suicide note: Dearest Martin, Night and day, I have been down on my knees praying to God that you would leave that butt-ugly Ellen woman and come back to me and Maggie. But no, my prayers did nothing but hit the ceiling. You are still with that home wrecker who is not worth the bullets it would take to blow her brains out. Since youve been gone, I feel that there is nothing left for me to live for and I might as well just go to be with our dear Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. In the event that I get up my nerve and decide to take my life, send our Maggie to live with my rich sister, Justine, if you and your bow-legged bitch dont want her. That way, at least one of us can live in Mountain Brook. Sincerely, Careen