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The international bestseller--­­more than 500,000 copies sold! With their 1994 international bestseller, Dealing with People You Can't Stand, Drs. Rick Brinkman and Rick Kirschner armed a civility-starved world with no-nonsense strategies for dealing with difficult people with tact and skill. Since then, cell phones, the Internet, voice mail, and other technological wonders designed to bring people closer together have only made it that much harder to avoid "people you can't stand;" even worse, they've also created exciting new ways for annoying people to realize their talent for being pains in the butt. Updated and revised for the digital age, this new edition of Brinkman and Kirschner's bestselling guide shows readers how to successfully combat the whiners, grenades, tanks, snipers, close-talkers, pedants, and other rude, crude, and inconsiderate people who can ruin your day at work, in stores, on the street, in restaurants, at the movies, in waiting rooms, by fax, phone, and E-mail, and in cyberspace.
Explains how to: Identify 10 bothersome behaviors and deal successfully with each of them Understand why people become difficult Use sophisticated techniques to neutralize whining, negativity, attacks, tantrums and more Cultivate the nine "take-charge" skills that prevent people from becoming difficult
The classic guide to bringing out the best in people at their worst—updated with even more can’t-standable people! Dealing with People You Can’t Stand has been helping good people deal with bad behavior in a positive, professional way for nearly two decades. Unfortunately, as the world becomes smaller and time more compressed, new difficult people are being made all the time. So Kirschner and Brinkman have updated their global bestseller to help you wring positive results from even the most twisted interactions you’re likely to experience today. Learn how to get things done and get along when you’re dealing with people who have the uncanny ability to sabotage, derail, and interfere with your plans, needs, and wants. Learn how to: Use sophisticated listening techniques to unlock the doors to people’ s minds, hearts, and deepest needs Apply “take-charge” skills that turn conflict into cooperation by reducing the differences between people Transform the destructive behavior of Tanks, Snipers, Know-It-Alls, Whiners, Martyrs, Meddlers, and other difficult types of people This enhanced eBook includes features you won’t find in the print edition, including: 7 comic book style presentations embedded with audio that depict different scenarios of dealing with toxic personalities—illustrating tips and strategies for making the best of the situation 16 entertaining and engaging videos showing how to resolve conflict situations with demonstrated positive and negative strategies Link to the Lens-of-Understanding Self-Assessment you can complete to evaluate your relationships with people in your life Access to a 27-minute audio of the authors explaining on how to change your overall attitude, so you can use the tools in the book even more effectively Whether you’re dealing with a coworker trying to take credit for your work, a distant family member who knows no personal bounds, or a loud cell phone talker on line at the grocery store, Dealing with People You Can’t Stand gives you the tools for bringing out the best in people at their worst.
One of the New York Post's Top 10 Career Books of 2012 and a Booklist Top 10 Business Book DO YOU WORK WITH A MEAN GIRL? A woman’s field guide to the new frontier of professional development—working with other women Women-to-women relationships in the workplace are . . . complicated. When they’re good, they’re great. But when they’re bad, they can ruin your day, your week—even your year. Packed with proven advice from two of today’s leading experts in workplace relationships, this one-of-a-kind guide gives women the tools they need to navigate difficult situations unique to women-to-women relationships—whether with a boss, a colleague, a client, or an employee. Have you dealt with a woman in the workplace who: “Accidentally” excludes you from important meetings? Seems intent on taking you down professionally? Gossips about you with other coworkers? Makes you look bad by missing deadlines? Forms a “pack” of mean girls to make your life miserable? Mean Girls at Work isn’t just about surviving difficult situations. It’s about transforming a toxic relationship into one that benefits and supports both of you. This book is also for women who engage in mean behavior . . . but don’t know it. After all, who hasn’t gossiped about a female coworker? Who hasn’t rolled her eyes in the presence of a woman she doesn’t like? Who hasn’t scanned another woman head to toe—which is just a nonverbal way of saying, “You’ve just been judged”? The authors provide invaluable advice to the more subtle ways of being mean—even if they’re not intended. With a workforce composed of a higher percentage of women than ever, workplace dynamics have changed. Crowley and Elster cover every conceivable scenario, providing critical advice on how to rise above the fray and move forward professionally. Mean Girls at Work is your map to dodging the mines and moving forward in today’s transformed workplace. Praise for Mean Girls at Work “An invaluable suit of armor for surviving nine to five!” —Leil Lowndes, bestselling author of How to Talk to Anyone “If you think the emotional cruelty of comedies like Mean Girls and Heathers doesn’t exist in the real world workplace, think again. In Mean Girls at Work, Katherine Crowley and Kathi Elster valuably chronicle female vs. female predators and offer solid defensive strategies.” —Ann Kreamer, author of It’s Always Personal: Navigating Emotion in the New Workplace “Whether you are in your twenties and just starting your professional career, your midcareer forties, when you are supposed to have figured it out already, or a woman in her fifties or sixties who’s seen it all—this book is a must-read. . . . The authors have finally given women the tools and the sound advice necessary to deal with . . . conflicts that keep us all from succeeding. . . . Carry this book with you to work every day!” —Carolyn Cassin, President, Michigan Women’s Foundation “A must-read for women of all ages in today’s workforce. This book offers what we all need to develop the capacities to endure this ever-changing workplace. We know it is all about relationships and you need the skills outlined in this book to survive and thrive when the Mean Girls attack.” —Kim Harrington, Coordinator, Professional Development and Training, Office of Human Resources, California State University, Sacramento
Dealing With People You Cant Stand offers practical tactics for resolving relationship challenges at work and home. It shows readers how to get things done, even when they are dealing with rude, crude, and inconsiderate people who have the ability to derail anything good that can happen
“This book is a contemporary classic—a shrewd and spirited guide to protecting ourselves from the jerks, bullies, tyrants, and trolls who seek to demean. We desperately need this antidote to the a-holes in our midst.”—Daniel H. Pink, best-selling author of To Sell Is Human and Drive How to avoid, outwit, and disarm assholes, from the author of the classic The No Asshole Rule As entertaining as it is useful, The Asshole Survival Guide delivers a cogent and methodical game plan for anybody who feels plagued by assholes. Sutton starts with diagnosis—what kind of asshole problem, exactly, are you dealing with? From there, he provides field-tested, evidence-based, and often surprising strategies for dealing with assholes—avoiding them, outwitting them, disarming them, sending them packing, and developing protective psychological armor. Sutton even teaches readers how to look inward to stifle their own inner jackass. Ultimately, this survival guide is about developing an outlook and personal plan that will help you preserve the sanity in your work life, and rescue all those perfectly good days from being ruined by some jerk. “Thought-provoking and often hilarious . . . An indispensable resource.”—Gretchen Rubin, best-selling author of The Happiness Project and Better Than Before “At last . . . clear steps for rejecting, deflecting, and deflating the jerks who blight our lives . . . Useful, evidence-based, and fun to read.”—Robert Cialdini, best-selling author of Influence and Pre-Suasion
A practical and hilarious guide to getting difficult people off your back, for anyone pulling their hair out over an irritating colleague who's not technically breaking any rules From open floor plans and Zoom calls to Slack channels, the workplace has changed a lot over the years. But there’s one thing that never changes: you’ll always encounter jerks. Jerks at Work is the definitive guide to dealing with—and ultimately breaking free from—the overbearing bosses, irritating coworkers, and all-around difficult people who make work and life miserable. Social psychologist Tessa West has spent years leveraging science to help people solve interpersonal conflicts in the workplace. What she discovered is that most of our go-to tactics don’t work because they fail to address the specific motivations that drive bad behavior. In this book, she takes you on a rollicking deep dive of the seven jerks you’re most likely to encounter at the office, drawing on decades of original research to expose their inner workings and weak points—and ultimately deliver an effective game plan for stopping each type before they take you down with them. Jerks at Work is packed with everyday examples and clever strategies, such as how to: • Stop a Bulldozer from gaining influence by making sure they're not the first to speak up in meetings • Report a Kiss Up/Kick Downer to a manager who idolizes them without looking like the bad guy • Protect your high-achieving team from Free Riders without stifling collaboration • Use a Gaslighter’s tactics to beat them at their own game For anyone who’s said “I can’t stand that jerk!” more times than they’d like to admit, Jerks at Work is the ultimate playbook you wish you didn’t need but will always turn to.
Originally published in 1985, this bestselling, essential book about management and motivation has over 1 million copies in print and remains relevant for today. Alan Loy McGinnis, author of the award-winning, international bestseller The Friendship Factor, studied great leaders throughout history, the most effective organizations of modern times, and prominent psychologists to culminate a wealth of motivational tips and ideas. In this book are 12 practical principles to help anyone -- parent, manager, teacher, friend -- motivate, inspire, influence, and build enthusiasm. Mastering the art of motivation and improving relational habits isn't easy but McGinnis includes encouragement alongside real-life examples to relay life application for any scenario. Every chapter is a must-read with deeper revelations on specific topics and powerful ways to focus one's energy toward change and improvement. People management, team-building, individual assessment, goal setting, accountability, and dealing with trouble-makers are just a few of the topics covered in the highly accessible chapters. McGinnis' positive and strengths-based approach inspires momentous change, allowing individuality and input along the way. Bringing out the best starts with you, and then you can bring out the best in others.
From the creator of the popular website Ask a Manager and New York’s work-advice columnist comes a witty, practical guide to 200 difficult professional conversations—featuring all-new advice! There’s a reason Alison Green has been called “the Dear Abby of the work world.” Ten years as a workplace-advice columnist have taught her that people avoid awkward conversations in the office because they simply don’t know what to say. Thankfully, Green does—and in this incredibly helpful book, she tackles the tough discussions you may need to have during your career. You’ll learn what to say when • coworkers push their work on you—then take credit for it • you accidentally trash-talk someone in an email then hit “reply all” • you’re being micromanaged—or not being managed at all • you catch a colleague in a lie • your boss seems unhappy with your work • your cubemate’s loud speakerphone is making you homicidal • you got drunk at the holiday party Praise for Ask a Manager “A must-read for anyone who works . . . [Alison Green’s] advice boils down to the idea that you should be professional (even when others are not) and that communicating in a straightforward manner with candor and kindness will get you far, no matter where you work.”—Booklist (starred review) “The author’s friendly, warm, no-nonsense writing is a pleasure to read, and her advice can be widely applied to relationships in all areas of readers’ lives. Ideal for anyone new to the job market or new to management, or anyone hoping to improve their work experience.”—Library Journal (starred review) “I am a huge fan of Alison Green’s Ask a Manager column. This book is even better. It teaches us how to deal with many of the most vexing big and little problems in our workplaces—and to do so with grace, confidence, and a sense of humor.”—Robert Sutton, Stanford professor and author of The No Asshole Rule and The Asshole Survival Guide “Ask a Manager is the ultimate playbook for navigating the traditional workforce in a diplomatic but firm way.”—Erin Lowry, author of Broke Millennial: Stop Scraping By and Get Your Financial Life Together
Strange as it may seem, other people are not nearly as committed to our happiness as we are. In fact, sometimes they seem like they're on a mission to make us miserable! There's always that one person. The one who hijacks your emotions and makes you crazy. The one who seems to thrive on drama. If you could just "fix" that person, everything would be better. But we can't fix other people--we can only make choices about ourselves. In this cut-to-the-chase book, communication expert Mike Bechtle shows readers that they don't have to be victims of other people's craziness. With commonsense wisdom and practical advice that can be implemented immediately, Bechtle gives readers a proven strategy to handle crazy people. More than just offering a set of techniques, Bechtle offers a new perspective that will change readers' lives as they deal with those difficult people who just won't go away.