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In Cruise Confidential, Brian David Bruns spills the dirt — or in this case, the dirty water — on those romantic, fun-filled vacations at sea. His hilarious chronicle of the year he spent working for Carnival Cruise Lines takes readers down into the areas where the crew works and lives, leaving readers gasping with laughter as they’re assaulted nonstop with events that range from the absurd to the utterly bizarre. Stewards fighting over food. Cutlery allowances and other nonsensical rules. What the crew calls those onboard (no, it’s not “passengers”). And of course, the sex. An abundance of ready, willing, and able bodies eager for action on a vessel replete with nooks and crannies leads to love in some mighty strange, and seemingly impossible, places. Breezy, entertaining, and informative, Cruise Confidential is essential reading for those planning a cruise or for anyone who just needs a good laugh.
Returning with his award-winning wit and delightfully candid narrative voice, Brian brings us the first and only expose of art auctioneering on the mighty liners, where the tenet of 'what happens at sea, stays at sea' has always been observed-until now. Ship for Brains takes on cruise ship art auctioneers, a society brimming with odd personalities drawn to the stress and isolation that invariably lead to alcohol and a Hell-may-care attitude. According to Bruns, "They willingly give up home and family in favor of high-paced, crushing sales goals demanded while port-hopping from nation to nation; art auctioneers are undermined by the lash of tyrannical ship officers, unforgiving gallery managers, hyena-like trainers, and a skeptical public. The burn-out rate is phenomenal-but when it works, you are king of the world." Brian's true-life struggle turns both harrowing and hilarious when goaded by the lecherous but mighty auctioneer Bill Shatner, and he must navigate sexy dancers and their all-to-intimate cliques, the slapstick schemes of his mentors, and the seduction of success, all while staying true to his girl and himself. We are transported from the Caribbean to the Pacific and Costa Rica to Transylvania as our likable guide vividly describes his many misadventures, triumphs, flirtations, and, above all, his amusing and astute insights into human nature. Ship for Brains-this ain't no galley tour.
If you want a holiday that's hassle-free, virtually pre-paid, and that lets you see lots of places while only needing to pack and unpack once, then you should try a cruise. This best-selling book is the cruise industry bible: it gives you all the information you need to choose the right cruise for you. Meticulously updated every year by cruise expert Douglas Ward, it is divided into two main parts: the first helps you work out what you're looking for in a cruise holiday and how to find it; the lively text and colour photographs describe every aspect of life on board, including safety, the highs and lows of the cruise experience and how to save money. The second part contains unbiased reviews and fascinating detail of almost 300 ocean-going cruise vessels, and grades them on service, food, entertainment and facilities, using an internationally recognised ratings system.
A three-continent romance was not what Brian expected when he first visited Transylvania, but Bianca lured him into an entire life making a playground of all seven seas. The Red Sea, the Black Sea, the Caribbean, the Aegean ... a head-spinning list of rendezvous. Luxury liners were their vehicle, with ship life like no other. The awesome power of the big ships to cross oceans of cultures kept bringing them together ... and pulling them apart. But it was a secret past that threatened to sink them. Vastly entertaining and expansive, hilarious and true, feel-good Mr. Brown shows us that the stuff of legendary romance lies in us all, if we but have the courage to reach for it. Finalist- Book of the Year, Humor, ForeWord AwardsFinalist- Book of the Year, Travel, ForeWord AwardsGold- USA Best Book AwardsSilver- Paris Book FestivalBronze- London Book FestivalBronze- Hollywood Book festival.
Dr. Kruz Nutty's laugh therapy for all Crazy Cruisers who HAVE to be afloat or sink in despair
A shocking exposé of modern piracy - the Fast Food Nation of the cruise industry
The 1950s ocean liner Queen Isabella is making her final voyage—a retro cruise from Long Beach to Hawaii and back—before heading to the scrapyard. For the guests on board, it’s a chance to experience a bygone era of decadent luxury, complete with fine dining, classic highballs, string quartets, and sophisticated jazz. Smoking is allowed but not cell phones—or children, for that matter. But this is the second decade of an uncertain new millennium, not the sunny, heedless mid-twentieth century, and certain disquieting signs of strife and malfunction above and below deck intrude on the festivities, throwing a trio of strangers together in an unexpected and startling test of character.
A glamorous ship. A missing woman. A holiday to DIE for... The gripping new thriller from the Sunday Times bestseller! ‘A brilliant new storyteller has arrived’ ERIN KELLY ‘Intense and claustrophobic’ HEAT ‘Agatha Christie with glamour’ SUNDAY TIMES
I wish I knew then what I know now! Don't get to the end of your law school career muttering these words to yourself! Take the first step toward building a productive, successful, and perhaps even pleasant law school experience...read this book! Written for students about to embark on this three year odyssey, by students who have successfully survived law school. Law School Confidential demystifies the life-altering thrill ride that defines an American legal education by providing a comprehensive, blow-by-blow, chronological account of what to expect. Law School Confidential arms students with a thorough overview of the contemporary law school experience. This isn't the advice of graying professors or battle-scarred practitioners decades removed from the law school. Fresh out of University of Pennsylvania Law School, Robert Miller has assembled a panel of recent law school graduates all of whom are perfectly positioned to shed light on what law school is like today. Law School Confidential invites you to walk in their steps to success and to learn from their mistakes. From taking the LSAT, to securing financial aid, to navigating the notorious first semester, to exam-taking strategies, to applying for summer internships, to getting on the law review, to tackling the bar and beyond...Law School Confidential explains it all.
This final installment of Brun's Cruise series finds Brian aboard the Wind Surf, a small sailing cruise ship that takes her passengers to cultural ports throughout the Mediterranean.