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Learn how to “break the spell” of control with this bestseller hailed by Oprah Winfrey. Controlling People reveals the thought processes of those who try to control others and provides a “spell-breaking” mind-set for those who suffer this insidious manipulation. Does this sound like someone you know? *Always needs to be right *Tells you who you are and what you think *Implies that you’re wrong or inadequate when you don’t agree *Is threatened by people who are “different” *Feels attacked when questioned *Doesn’t seem to really hear or see you If any of the above traits sounds familiar, help is on the way! In Controlling People, bestselling author Patricia Evans, tackles the “controlling personality,” and reveals how and why these people try to run other people’s lives. She also explains the compulsion that makes them continue this behavior—even as they alienate others and often lose those they love. Controlling People helps you unravel the senseless behavior that plagues both the controller and the victim. Can the pattern or spell be broken? YES, says the author. By understanding the compelling force involved, you can be a catalyst for change and actually become a spell-breaker. Once the spell is broken and the controller sees others as they really are, a genuine connection can be forged and healing can occur. Should you ever find yourself in the thrall of someone close to you, Controlling People is here to give you the wisdom, power, and comfort you need to be a stronger, happier, and more independent person.
"We need to strive for a world where people control what is important to themselves while minimizing the controlling of others." We are all controlling people. In fact our feelings of wellbeing depend on staying in control. Just as when we drive a car, we must stay in control in everyday life in order to keep the things we care about going in the right direction. Yet this natural controlling behavior is sometimes the very reason we end up losing control. This happens when we try to control other people as well as when we try to control ourselves. So how do we do better? Based on Perceptual Control Theory (PCT), this entertaining and enlightening book by psychologists Richard S. Marken and Timothy A. Carey explores the paradox of why we often lose control by trying to be in control and why our controlling nature makes it difficult to stop this self-defeating behavior. They show that understanding PCT opens the window to understanding and learning about ourselves as controlling people and equips us to lead more effective and satisfying lives.
In a crisis, it's easy to revert to old patterns. Caring for your well-being during the coronavirus pandemic includes maintaining healthy boundaries and saying no to unhealthy relationships. The healing touchstone of millions, this modern classic by one of America's best-loved and most inspirational authors holds the key to understanding codependency and to unlocking its stultifying hold on your life. Is someone else's problem your problem? If, like so many others, you've lost sight of your own life in the drama of tending to someone else's, you may be codependent--and you may find yourself in this book--Codependent No More. The healing touchstone of millions, this modern classic by one of America's best-loved and most inspirational authors holds the key to understanding codependency and to unlocking its stultifying hold on your life. With instructive life stories, personal reflections, exercises, and self-tests, Codependent No More is a simple, straightforward, readable map of the perplexing world of codependency--charting the path to freedom and a lifetime of healing, hope, and happiness. Melody Beattie is the author of Beyond Codependency, The Language of Letting Go, Stop Being Mean to Yourself, The Codependent No More Workbook and Playing It by Heart.
From one of the world's most acclaimed experts on verbal abuse comes the first book that answers the question foremost in every woman's mind: Can he really change? Evans goes beyond identifying verbally abusive behaviors to prescribing a course of action for both victim and abuser.
Everyone knows someone who is impossible to please, critical, judgmental, picky, and stubbornly closed-minded. These are symptoms of a disorder called obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD), but it’s common for people to have subclinical levels of some or all of these qualities. Most of the time, it’s best to avoid the difficult to please person, but what happens when he or she is a close family member, coworker, or even a spouse? It’s still possible to maintain a positive relationship with the right tools. Impossible to Please, written by the authors of Toxic Coworkers, is a manual for dealing with these difficult people without sitting through stressful arguments, vicious insults and attacks, and passive-aggressive behavior. It empowers readers to take charge of the relationship and regain their dignity and confidence in interactions with these individuals. This book features specific strategies that are immediately effective when conversing with critical people and explains how readers can respond to unfair blame without becoming angry or overly defensive. By setting boundaries, improving communication, and asserting themselves, readers learn to deal with the impossible to please in romantic relationships, friendships, family, and work relationships.
In this groundbreaking book, Dr. David Schnarch, one of the foremost experts on sexuality and relationships, explains why normal healthy couples in long-term relationships have sexual desire problems, regardless of how much they love each other or how well they communicate. In-depth examples of couples he has counselled reveal his unique understanding of common-but-difficult sexual desire problems that affect couples of all ages. Combining compassion and clinical wisdom, Dr. Schnarch explains how to use his revolutionary Four Points of Balance approach to resolve low desire, mismatched desire, sexual boredom, and the emotional gridlock that accompanies these problems. Intimacy and Desire provides a roadmap for how couples can transform common sexual desire problems into self-exploration and personal development that leads to psychological and spiritual growth, stronger relationships, and more powerful and meaningful desire for each other. It provides time-proven comprehensive solutions that help couples reconnect with each other sexually, and take their intimacy and passion to new, previously unexplored heights.
This book will help both the dominator and the manipulated recognise and deal with these issues, and enable individuals to walk in the liberty of the Holy Spirit.
Self-Control in Animals and People takes an interdisciplinary look at what self-control is, how it works, and whether humans are alone as a species in their ability to demonstrate self-control. The book outlines historical and recent empirical approaches to understanding when self-control succeeds and fails, and which species may share with humans the ability to anticipate better future outcomes. It also provides readers with in-depth explorations of whether various species can delay gratification, the ways in which people and animals exhibit other forms of self-control, what influences the capacity and expression of self-control, and much more. In addition to its comprehensive coverage of self-control research, the book also describes self-control assessment tests that can be used with young children, adults, and a wide variety of nonhuman species, with the goal of making fair and clear comparisons among the groups. This combination makes Self-Control in Animals and People a valuable resource for cognitive, developmental, and clinical psychologists, philosophers, academic students and researchers in psychology and the social sciences, and animal behaviorists. - Provides a comprehensive perspective of the evolutionary emergence of self-control across species - Explores different "kinds" of self-control and their links to one another, and whether self-control can be improved or strengthened - Offers insight on mental time travel (chronesthesia) and how it relates to self-control - Demonstrates how to develop self-control tests for human and nonhuman animals, and how to make fair and clear comparisons among those groups
Runkel links Perceptual Control Theory (PCT) thinking to psychological literature and discusses it against that background.
This Master-Plan gives you the incalculable new power to dominate, command and manipulate people around you! Add new STRENGTH to your WILL! Get new AUTHORITY in your MANNER! New POWER to COMMAND! New-won MASTERY of LIFE! DON’T put off for one more day your decision. Take this book into your life now. Start the automatic success-process working in your own career and personal life as well. You could be—right now—enjoying the glittering rewards life brings to the Man of Power...wealth, good living, a happy family, hosts of admiring friends and subordinates, the prestige and social success given to the Man of Power! USE this step-by-step plan today and watch your life become a golden road to success as you begin to use your new-won POWER...INFLUENCE...and CONTROL OVER THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU! A classic in the Do-It-Yourself genre.