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The relationship teacher, coach, and founder of The Relationship School reveals the origins of conflict styles, how to stop avoiding difficult conversations, and how to resolve conflict in our most important relationships. Conflicts in our closest relationships are scary because so much is at stake. If the conflict doesn't go well, we could lose our marriage, our family or our job, all connected to our security and survival. So we do just about anything not to lose those relationships, including avoid conflict, betraying ourselves or becoming dishonest. Unresolved conflict affects every single aspect of our lives, from self-confidence to physical and mental health. Jayson Gaddis is a personal trainer for relationships and one of the world’s leading authorities on interpersonal conflict. For almost two decades, Gaddis has helped individuals, couples, and teams get to the bottom of their deepest conflicts. He helps people see the wisdom in conflict and how to get to zero—which means we have successfully worked through our conflict and have nothing in the way of a good connection. In Getting to Zero, Gaddis shows the reader how to stop running away from uncomfortable conversations and instead learn how to work through them. Through funny personal stories, uncomfortable examples, and effective tools and skills, he shows the reader how to move from disconnection to connection, acceptance, and understanding. This method upgrades the old tired and static conflict resolution approaches and offers a fresh, street-level, user-friendly road map on exactly how to work through conflict with the people you care most about.
What if you could have difficult conversations with ease? In From Conflict to Connection, you will learn a way of being in relationship with yourself and others that creates new possibilities out of discord and disagreements.
A groundbreaking study of unity and conflict in Baptist life in New Zealand.
In his fourth book of well-loved quotes, Jeff Brown delivers his most compelling message yet: the power of love, friendship, and healing. In his notoriously candid style, Jeff dazzles us with poignant, intimate, and insightful heartspeak. His wisdom and word wizardry encompass all forms of relationship: romantic partnerships, soul-friendships, family bonds, and our connection to the greater world. He also addresses the often gritty yet essential work of healing our wounds. We struggle in relationship, and we also heal in relationship. At a time when our world is fractured by polarized views, Hearticulations reminds us of the golden threads that bind us togetherƒƒ‚‚ƒ‚‚"ƒƒ‚‚ƒ‚‚€ƒƒ‚‚ƒ‚‚"our shared vulnerable humanityƒƒ‚‚ƒ‚‚"ƒƒ‚‚ƒ‚‚€ƒƒ‚‚ƒ‚‚"and that there is more that connects us than divides us. This will be a book to carry around with you, or pass on to a dear friend. Like a pocket-sized oracle, turn to a random page and be uplifted by this lexicon of love.
"Invaluable for so many partners looking to reconnect and grow closer together." —Gwyneth Paltrow, founder and CEO of goop "Stan Tatkin can be entirely followed into the towering infernos of our most painful relationship challenges." —Alanis Morissette, artist, activist, and wholeness advocate The complete “insider’s guide” to understanding your partner’s brain, sparking lasting connection, and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust—now with more than 170,000 copies sold. “What the heck is my partner thinking?” “Why do they always react like this?” “How can we get back that connection we had in the beginning?” If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, you aren’t alone, and it doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed. Every person is wired for love differently—with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people’s minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and routines, making it possible to neurologically prime the brain for greater love and connection and fewer conflicts. This go-to guide will show you how. Drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this highly anticipated second edition of Wired for Love presents cutting-edge research on how and why love lasts, and offers ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship. This fully revised and updated edition also includes new guidance on how to manage disagreements, as well as new exercises to help you create a sense of safety and security, establish healthy conflict ground rules, and deal with the threat of the third—any outside source which threatens the harmony in your relationship, including in-laws, alcohol, children, and affairs. You’ll find proven-effective strategies to help you strengthen your relationship by: Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening routines to stay connected Learning how to see your partner’s point of view Meeting each other halfway in a fight Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By using simple gestures and words, you’ll learn to put out emotional fires and help your partner feel appreciated and loved. You’ll also discover how to move past a “warring brain” mentality and toward a more cooperative “loving brain.” Most importantly, you’ll gain a better understanding of the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships. While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you understand how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences, and create a lasting intimate connection.
CHAPTER 1. INTRODUCTION: Conflict is an inevitable aspect of any relationship, and in the context of marriage and intimate partnerships, it can often feel overwhelming. However, it's essential to recognize that conflict, when handled constructively, can actually strengthen and deepen the bond between partners. "Navigating Conflict: A Guide to Managing Conflict in Marriage and Relationships" sets out to provide practical strategies and insights for couples to navigate conflict in a healthy and productive manner. In this book, we delve into the nature of conflict within relationships, emphasizing that it's a natural and inevitable part of being human. Drawing from psychology and relationship research, we explore the various triggers and dynamics that contribute to conflict, including differing expectations, communication styles, and unresolved issues from the past. By normalizing conflict, we aim to alleviate the stigma and fear often associated with it, empowering couples to approach disagreements with greater resilience and understanding. The Importance of Effectively Managing Conflict: Here, we highlight the significance of addressing conflict proactively for the overall health and longevity of a relationship. Unresolved conflicts can fester and lead to resentment, erosion of trust, and ultimately, relationship breakdown. Conversely, couples who learn to manage conflict constructively not only strengthen their connection but also cultivate greater intimacy, empathy, and mutual respect. We underscore that conflict resolution skills are essential for maintaining a thriving and fulfilling partnership, regardless of the stage or duration of the relationship. Overview of the Book Structure: This section provides a roadmap for the eBook, outlining the key themes, chapters, and exercises designed to support couples in navigating conflict more effectively. Each chapter will address specific aspects of conflict management, from understanding triggers and communication patterns to practicing active listening and negotiating compromises. Throughout the eBook, readers will find practical tips, case studies, and reflective prompts to apply the concepts to their own relationship dynamics. By offering a comprehensive yet accessible framework, "Navigating Conflict" aims to empower couples to transform conflict from a source of tension into an opportunity for growth and deeper connection
A professor of psychology details a five-step process called "motion coaching" that allows parents to raise a child better able to cope with his or her emotions. 35,000 first printing.
"Professor Kellett′s text is unique among undergraduate texts in its use of narrative theory to understand conflicts and to develop more effective strategies in family and relational conflicts. The most impressive aspect of the text is the rich and compelling stories. Students and practitioners will be able to relate to the stories and learn important conflict analysis techniques and communication skills through them." —Angela Laird Brenton, University of Arkansas at Little Rock "The text is a wonderful study of the role of archetype in a conflict and the use of narrative. I am impressed with the notion of projection. In a self-focused society we don′t often think that the problem may lie within ourselves. The book teaches the skill of self-reflection and helps readers to become more other-centered. I am pleased to read the case studies as they provide fine classroom tools; they are engaging and diverse. Kellett has done much to incorporate narrative into the study of conflict and communication. Conflict Dialogue is a welcome addition to the body of conflict literature and centers communication within that body of literature." —Christopher Lynch, Kean University Conflicts are more effectively managed if people understand the layers meaning in their conflicts and collaborate based on those meanings. In this book, author Peter M. Kellett analyzes and interprets real-life conflict stories as a way to create opportunities for more productive ways to navigate and resolve conflict. Key Features: Examines real, lived experiences of conflict: Real-life conflict stories, from students themselves, illustrate how people actually manage conflict and allow readers to identify with experiences from their own lives. These stories represent the different participants in the conflict allowing readers to compare and contrast the meaning of the conflict from varied perspectives. Addresses diversity in conflicts: Because conflicts are mediated by both personal and cultural issues of identity, case study narratives of diverse cultural relationships and conflicts are included throughout. Blends theoretical depth with practical technique: This book uses an additive approach that builds theoretically grounded technique through four sections. Throughout each chapter, readers get both a sense of the depth and complexity of conflicts and an understanding how dialogic negotiation can be used to create more productive relationships. Intended Audience: This is an ideal textbook for advanced undergraduate and graduate courses such as Interpersonal Conflict, Conflict Analysis/Management, Dispute Resolution, and Negotiation in the fields of Communication, Sociology, Psychology, Human Resources, and Business & Management. It is also an excellent resource for scholars, researchers, and practitioners in the areas of conflict and dispute resolution.
′...effectively fills a long-standing void and will no doubt be hailed as a much-needed new addition to the literature... This text very much exemplifies the strength of Ho-Won Jeong as a theorist and one of the more prolific writers in the larger peace and conflict studies field... the final three chapters on ′De-escalation Dynamics′ (which includes a brief section on third party intervention), on ′Conciliation Strategies,′ and especially the one on ′Ending Conflict,′ which provides a range of outcomes beyond the usual focus on third party intervention (read mediation) epitomizes the value of this new text′ - Journal of Peace Research ′...an awesome tour d′horizon of modern war, violence, and confrontation within and between nations. Illustrating via just about every conflict in every corner of the world, the author invokes an endless array of insights and interpretations, ranging from the micro to the macro, beautifully written in a seamless sequence of closely linked and discursive essays.′ - Professor J. David Singer, University of Michigan ′Ho-Won Jeong has written an illuminatinbg analysis of the dynamics of conflict. He lays out the tools we have to analyze conflict in a literate and comprehensive way. A valuable book for anyone interested in a more comprehensive understanding of conflict, its sources, and its deescalation and termination′ - Janice Gross Stein, Belzberg Professor of Conflict Management, Director, Munk Centre for International Studies, University of Toronto ′Jeong has successfully combined behavioral and structural analysis of the dynamics of social conflict. This volume covers the multiple dimensions - escalation, entrapment, de-escalation, termination, and resolution - both of violent and non-violent confrontation between adversaries, as well as the utility and limitations of external intervention. For students of the social sciences, it should serve as an excellent introduction to the complex realities of social conflict.′ - Milton Esman, John S. Knight Professor of International Studies, Emeritus, Cornell University By examining the dynamic forces which shape and re-shape major conflicts, this timely book provides students with the knowledge base needed to successfully study conflict sources, processes and transformations. Broad in focus, it addresses the multiple social, political and psychological features central to understanding conflict situations and behaviour. A range of both recent and historical examples (including the Arab-Israeli conflict, the ′War on Terrorism′, the Cold War, and the civil wars in Sudan, former Yugoslavia and Sri Lanka) are discussed, illustrating the application of concepts and theories essential to the analysis of inter-group, inter-state and intra-state conflict and conflict resolution in a wider context. Understanding Conflict and Conflict Analysis is key reading for students of international relations, peace and conflict studies, conflict resolution, international security and international law.