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Book of Amusing Anecdotes is filled with real-life amusing incidents centred around children. The book is simple, refreshing, and easy-to-read, which you can connect with your own life.
One of the most popular questions cops get asked is "What's the funniest thing that's ever happened to you on the job?" Well, we set out to gather a few funny stories from across North America and compiled them into this eBook with some stories you will want to read again and again to laugh at and share with your friends. So many times in the career of law enforcement officers, you end up saying "You just can't make this stuff up!" So, here are some insights as to the sorts of things that we have laid eyes on or experienced that we hope you'll enjoy! Please be aware that the stories in this book are REAL and some involve recounting nudity or other PG-16+ situations that you may want to consider if you find such real situations (that cops see and have to learn to laugh at) offensive.
How did Jon Scieszka get so funny? He grew up as one of six brothers with Catholic school, lots of comic books, lazy summers at the lake with time to kill, babysitting misadventures, TV shows, and jokes told at family dinner.
Like many ambitious New York City teenagers, Craig Gilner sees entry into Manhattan's Executive Pre-Professional High School as the ticket to his future. Determined to succeed at life—which means getting into the right high school to get into the right college to get the right job—Craig studies night and day to ace the entrance exam, and does. That's when things start to get crazy. At his new school, Craig realizes that he isn't brilliant compared to the other kids; he's just average, and maybe not even that. He soon sees his once-perfect future crumbling away.
First, some giant ants steal breakfast. Then there are the evil ninjas, massive ape, mysterious mole people, giant blob, and countless other daunting (and astonishing) detours along the way to school. Are these excuses really why this student is late? Or is there another explanation that is even more outrageous than the rest? From Davide Cali and Benjamin Chaud, the critically acclaimed author/illustrator team behind I Didn't Do My Homework Because . . . comes a fast-paced, actionpacked, laugh-out-loud story about finding the way to school despite the odds—and the unbelievable oddness! Plus, this is the fixed format version, which will look almost identical to the print version. Additionally for devices that support audio, this ebook includes a read-along setting.
Funny Girl is a collection of uproarious stories, rollicking comics, rib-tickling wit, and more, from 25 of today’s funniest female writers for kids. What could be funnier than family? Read stories about Ursula Brown's grandmother driving her on a road trip to disaster, Lisa Brown's little brother getting a Tic-Tac stuck up his nose, and Carmen Agra Deedy's mom setting the bathtub on fire. What could be funnier than friends? Pretty much nothing, as Rita Williams-Garcia shows two besties hatching a bird-brained scheme to get on to a TV talk show, and Deborah Underwood introduces a dynamic dog-and-cat duo teaming up on a pet advice column. What could be funnier than YOU? Tell your future with Mad Libs, discover your Chinese Zodiac sign with Lenore Look, and learn the best tricks of the comedy trade from professional humorists like Adrianne Chalepah and Delaney Yeager. With clever contributions from award-winning and bestselling authors including Cece Bell, Sophie Blackall, Libba Bray, Shannon Hale, Lisa Graff, and Raina Telgemeier, this anthology of funny girls will make you laugh until you cry. Or cry until you laugh. Or maybe you won't cry at all. Either way, you'll definitely laugh. Funny Girl isn’t just an anthology: it’s a cause, a mission, a movement. Girls are funny. Now it’s time for the world to know it.
Excerpt from The Funny Bone: Short Stories and Amusing Anecdotes for a Dull Hour Tew pick out a good husband - shut up both eyes, grab hard, and trust in the Lord. There ain't nothing that iz a sure kure for laziness, but i hav known a second wife tew hurry it sum. About the Publisher Forgotten Books publishes hundreds of thousands of rare and classic books. Find more at www.forgottenbooks.com This book is a reproduction of an important historical work. Forgotten Books uses state-of-the-art technology to digitally reconstruct the work, preserving the original format whilst repairing imperfections present in the aged copy. In rare cases, an imperfection in the original, such as a blemish or missing page, may be replicated in our edition. We do, however, repair the vast majority of imperfections successfully; any imperfections that remain are intentionally left to preserve the state of such historical works.
Every other Thursday on Santa Monica Boulevard’s Comedy Central Stage, a motley assortment of prolific Hollywood writers, actors, and comics convene to reveal the most personal—and colorful—parts of their lives. Their soul-baring monologues reveal the sources of their creative genius, from wacky families, to psycho exes, random ramblings, and unbelievable Hollywood insights. This hilarious collection, featuring a foreword by Arrested Development's Mitch Hurwitz and Jim Vallely, includes some of their best confessions. It provides an inside scoop on Hollywood, including stories on mishaps at the Emmys, writing for popular shows, being put in a sleeper hold by Hulk Hogan, growing up in famous families, and what it’s like to play Jan Brady. Funny, embarrassing, or dirty (or a combination thereof), but always brutally honest, Dirty Laundry shines a voyeuristic light on the underbellies of the people who have sold their souls to the entertainment biz. Authors include Maggie Rowe, Andersen Gabrych, Doug Benson, Kevin Nealon, Richard Belzer, Amy Stiller, Laura Silverman, Mary Birdsong, Taylor Negron, Randy Sklar, Kelly Carlin-McCall, Jennifer Elise Cox, Tom Saunders, Eileen Conn, Carlos Kotkin, Eddie Pepitone, Mark Evan Jackson, C. Brian Smith, Davis McHenry, Matt Price, David Landsberg, David Chrisman, Keith Blaney, Andrea Abbate, Jonathan Schmock, Jen Sincero, Claudia Lonow, Jackie Kashian, Shaz Bennet, B. Mark Seabrooks, Stirling Gardner, and Drew Droege.